where to start on voice training???

[oatmilkzombie]

I hate my voice, I'm pretty sure I want tracheal shave but I'm broke, unemployed, and staying with my parents and I just don't know where to start with voice training and it feels hopeless, I know it's not I know I'll get there at some point but I just hate it so much that even hearing it causes me dysphoria. sorry, heavy I know, I just need advice on where to start

[Maid Marion]

There are a bunch of things that can be done to sound more feminine.
Women are more likely to enunciate or speak their words clearly.
You may want to practice that.  Take your time to speak words clearly.

Women use properly formed sentences instead of simple one or two word answers.
Learn to respond appropriately.

Women modulate their sentences.
This allows them to introduce sarcasm or the ability to say one thing and mean something else entirely.

Acquafina is the actress in Crazy Rich Asians that has a deep husky voice that is also feminine.

[Lori Dee]

Check out TransVoiceLessons on YouTube. Lots of how-tos and exercises.

[Robbyv213]

You tube seems like a good place for now. Or pick your fav singer or actress whose voice you like and try to emulate them. Like when people try to impersonate Arnold Schwarzenegger. Lol I know stupid example but many get it pretty well after some practice. So why not try that with say Sandra Bullock or Taylor Swift lol.

As for surgery I know there are at least two ways surgeons shorten the vocal chords but can be risky either way.

And obviously there is a speech therapy. I know most use one of those devices you would use to tune an instrument. And depending on your normal voice they teach you how to reach a realistic higher pitch and tone using that tuner.

[Sarah B]

Hi Aria

I seems that I have been beaten to the post by Maid Marion, Lori and Robby.  So I will just briefly go over what has already been mentioned

Maid Marion has given basic information on how females speak and these pointers are sometimes mentioned on the internet and of course YouTube, which Lori first mentioned (I was just going to reply with just 'YouTube', initially) is usually the port of call when one wants to know about something.  Finally, Robby mentions imitation is another way to go about learning how to speak like females out there.

For me, who never had any of this information, the only thing I knew and I don't know how I came across it was to practice and sing along with other female singers.  In other words imitation, which I was good at doing with accents.

Which I did while I travelled to swimming practice every morning and evening.  Singing along with Oliver Newton John, Cyndi Lauper, Stevie Nicks and Annie Lennox to name a few and the music came from a cassette tape no less of all things!

One other trick, I found out about and that was to speak softly.  When I finally changed my life around and got my first job all I did was speak in a very soft voice.  When I was at my first job as Sarah, I was told by another female employee that I spoke so soft and quietly or something similar, it was a very nice compliment and I suppose it was good for myself esteem and yes I was stunned to say the least.

Robby mentioned surgery (tracheal shave) and speech therapy, but since you do not have the money for these options yet, then the solutions above will work to your advantage.

So practice each day and remember.  Perfect practice makes perfect.  As my swimming coach of olde would use to say.

Love and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter
@LoriDee
@Robbyv213
@Maid Marion
@oatmilkzombie

[Maid Marion]

I never speak softly.  I'm tiny and always speak up to avoid getting ignored!
Being tiny and feminine I usually get to initiate conversation.
I've gotten good at the nonverbal body language folks use to negotiate social interactions.
Folks do this to avoid getting turned down or embarrassed in social situations.

Good conversation is an art. It can be very rewarding if you can get good at it.
It is much like golf, which a very difficult learning curve.
It can be very rewarding once you get sufficiently good at it.  Or immensely frustrating if you can't.

[Sarah B]

Hi Marion

I never speak softly.  I'm tiny and always speak up to avoid getting ignored!

It's funny that you should say that.  I spent 10 years as lifeguard and swimming instructor and in that time i learned to project my voice, so that others could hear me around the pool, which of course can be noisy as it was a indoor swimming pool.

I was not the only female who could do that and a colleague of mine could also do that and on occasion we would discuss it.  So yeah, speaking softly does not always work and as time goes on your voice and confidence changes.  So I don't think I speak softly anymore to the extent that I use to.

Being tiny and feminine I usually get to initiate conversation.
I've gotten good at the nonverbal body language folks use to negotiate social interactions.
Folks do this to avoid getting turned down or embarrassed in social situations.

Good conversation is an art. It can be very rewarding if you can get good at it.
It is much like golf, which a very difficult learning curve.
It can be very rewarding once you get sufficiently good at it.  Or immensely frustrating if you can't.

One is always learning and that is what I'm always trying to do.  Learn something new each day and what you have said is something one can learn from.

Take care and all the best.

Love and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter
@Maid Marion

[Clarissa Heng]

The thing about learning from Youtube is that there are SO many resources available that you don't know where to start. Like, which video is supposed to be Lesson 1, and then which is Lesson 2. It's all over the place.

[Nadine Spirit]

Clarissa -

That's why I short cut the process and first sought out a voice coach. She taught me the basics of what to do, we practiced together for awhile, and since then I just practice, practice, practice.

To do it on your own I'd start with small things like doing scales. Maybe that's what they're called.....hmm..... anywho, start off with saying the vowel "e," with a lower pitch and slowly go higher. Doing that daily, or twice a day even, can help to strengthen your vocal chords and allow you a greater range over time.

[Robbyv213]

Yes check out trans voice lessons on you tube. I have been doing their beginner practice video over and over.

The creater really changed her voice over the course of 5 years. I can only hope to have half as much success as she did.

[Lori Dee]

If you have a smartphone, download the Voice Tools app. It's what my Voice Coach uses. It has a voice pitch analyzer as well as other features. One of the features is that you read a paragraph while it analyzes your voice. It also gives you phrases to practice saying while it monitors your pitch.

When just getting started, record your voice reading a paragraph of something, anything. Save that recording. Then do it again in a month and compare them. Soon you will get to a point where you can tell that you are trying too hard and it doesn't sound natural. Just keep practicing until it does.

[imallie]

I'd really recommend a vocal coach. There certainly are some great vocal resources online... but like anything else, you'll do so much better, so much more quickly and confidently with personal attention.

In terms of finding the right vocal coach, I'd suggest the following:

1. If someone or some site offers before/after examples of their clients, listen to them. If you're not thrilled with the way those voices sound? Move on. There are lot of vocal coaches who think helping people to sound like Minnie Mouse is the same thing as feminizing a voice (some of the free lessons may do this too). Softer and higher is not always the key.

2. Check your insurance. Believe it or not, a lot of insurance plans do cover vocal training. They will cover vocal surgery as part of their trans care, so it makes sense that they'd encourage clients to take the much less intrusive (and costly) course of lessons first — which is why they often pay for it.

3. Check some of the bigger hospitals and universities in your area. Many of them run group and even individual vocal lessons. Some are part of their teaching system, but you can really benefit as the programs are often free or require a minimum charge. And because they're affiliated like that, they're taken very seriously and well regarded.  But again, do research.

When I found my coach? I found a coach whose entire vibe I meshed with. The way she talked about the process and her goals of working with trans clients spoke to me. But she was across the country so our timing wouldn't work. But she said "I have a friend who is just like me who lives near you"... and boom, I had a coach.

So... sometimes it's just dumb luck too. I guess that's #4 😘

But lastly, PLEASE don't hate your voice. It's the only one you have. Everyone sounds weird to themselves. And every voice is unique and valuable. Watch TV with your eyes closed and you'll notice the incredible range in women's voices — from high to low, deep to thin, etc...  so there's nothing to hate. ❤️

Love,
Allie