I have been a regular swimmer all my life, but I came out in 2020 at the start of Covid, so our pools were closed. I had GRS in 2021, but prior to this my genitals were so atrophied that I was flat in front anyway. My physical problem is that I am really big in my upper body and tiny around my hips, so swim outfits simply don't fit me as I am size 20 up top and size 10 on the bottom.
While I did get B cups, I could easily go to the beach topless and just look like a man with moobs. I live at the beach, and my grandkids always want me to come in the sea with them, so it was getting me down. I had to stop lap swimming due to rotator cuff damage and tendon wear from 40 years in the pool. So I had BA to improve my confidence, and bought a rash top and bikini bottom. I tentatively waded into the sea with my grandkids, and nobody stared at me!
Last year I noticed that my walking was becoming restricted, where I would walk 5 kilometres most days (to keep fit) I was having to stop and rest more and more. We looked for causes and eventually found that I have prolapsed discs, and bone growing into my spinal cord. We are still looking for answers to this, but to maintain leg muscles, my doctor told me to walk laps in the pool. I mentioned that if I was going to the pool, I would like to try swimming again, and my doctor noted that my shoulder night pain had subsided, so I could try a few laps and see if the pain came back.
So I headed off to the local pool, but I had my costume on under my clothes so I only had to remove my outer clothes before getting into the pool. No drama, but after a few laps, my right shoulder began hurting. I realised it was as I stroked a bit harder to breathe to my left, so I continued trying to breathe to my right, but then my left shoulder began to ache. I figured 300 metres was enough after a 3 year break, so I started my walking laps. I was a bit disappointed.
When I finished my session, I had to face the change room challenge, and to make it harder, a Kinder group had just finished their lessons and the ladies was full of toddlers and Mums. Our showers are seperate, and I managed to shower and get my panties, bra and top on, but I had to go out into the general change area to finish dressing. Now, 4 year olds tend to say what they think, so I braced for embarrassing questions, but none came! It all went normally and I was delighted!
I thought about it at home for a couple of days and decided next time I would take a diving mask and snorkel so I didn't have to breath to the side! It worked, I did have to have a couple of rests, but I managed 1000 metres with no shoulder pain! Of course, that night would be the real test as that is when shoulder pain is worst, but I was clear!! The change room was similar with 8 year olds this time, but no problems!
I was encouraged to buy a membership, and I go at least once a week, sometimes twice, and I swim 1000 metres (which is the agreed limit with my doc, as I used to swim 4 to 5 kilometres a session), and walk 1500 metres. Not bad for a very overweight 70 year old! Being old does lower public expectation about my appearance, but the pool now holds no fears for me, and I am back doing something I love.
Another important thing for me is being able to participate in swimming so normalises my life. When I couldn't go swimming or to the beach, I felt not really part of society, excluded because I was trans, but now I feel just like any other person.
Hugs,
Allie
