Hi Kylie Hi Kylie,
I really appreciate you sharing your story. Walking into a gas station on your first day in a new town, just being yourself and putting yourself out there, it takes a lot of guts. I'm genuinely sorry to hear that you don't have friends or family to lean on at the moment. It's tough to navigate all this without support, but the fact that you are still pushing forward is something to truly be proud of.
I remember when I threw out my old clothes. I literally tossed all my clothes in the garbage bin, right in front of my best friend. I guess it felt liberating, but that was quite a while ago. But I never looked back.
It's awesome to hear you have got your first doctor's appointment lined up and that you are starting the process to change your name. When I changed my life around, I changed my most important document right away and then tackled the rest over time. I've never had issues because of it. Getting that legal recognition sorted out early really helps make everything else easier.
About those feelings of doubt only you can truly know if this is the right path for you. But if this makes you happier, that speaks volumes. You mentioned feeling like you are in a completely different place now and I can relate. All I did was change my clothes and then got back to work within three months. The rest? Well, the rest they say is "history".
When it comes to surgery, I would suggest taking your time with top surgery. Hormones often take three to five years to fully work in terms of breast development. It might make sense to focus on saving for bottom surgery first, then re-evaluate later. If, after a few years, you are still not happy with how your breasts look, top surgery will always be there as an option. Just give your body the time it needs to adjust.
You have made a brave leap and it sounds like this has been on your mind for a long time. Keep moving at your own pace and don't hesitate to reach out here at Susan's anytime you need. You are not alone in this anymore.
Take care and all the best for the future.
Best Wishes AlwaysSarah BGlobal Moderator@Kylie725