queston

[kristinrichann]

My other half and I are wondering were are the Signifiant Others  mostly all we see are the other half talking   not to stir up issues   but we also saw that Susan has asked that this board is to be used by the Signifiant Others not as a place for us to vent
  even my other half agrees that there needs to be a place that they can come and voice their opinions
with each other  and as she has said it is no wonder why no other wives or exwives are posting here to get the help that they need not only do we need suport but so do they

Susan my other half is interested in helping out and she will be sending you a e-mail shortly

Lets all give them a chance   I gave mine a chance and it has worked for the best for me   not all situations will be the same  but we wont know if we dont give them a honest chance
Kristin  &  Pippi doll

[Ms Bev]

Marcy reads much, if not all my posts at Susan's.  She knows she's more than welcome to post here, and has thought about it from time to time.  I guess she doesn't want to, or she would have by now.  I love the other involvements she has regarding transsexuality, mine specically.........we love sharing our precious time together, and talk, talk, talk.......shop, try on clothes, get our hair and nails done together, watch sunsets (not sunrises..the lazybones), watch movies in bed, and other joyful things

We do a few things apart from each other, like me spending time here as she watches a show I'm not so interested in, or while she's reading a good novel.

Maybe someday she will introduce herself here at Susan's.





Bev,
significant other of the significant other

[TamTam]

Bev, is that you and your SO in your avatar?  You're both so pretty. 

[chrerry]

My other half and I are wondering were are the Signifiant Others  mostly all we see are the other half talking   not to stir up issues   but we also saw that Susan has asked that this board is to be used by the Signifiant Others not as a place for us to vent
  even my other half agrees that there needs to be a place that they can come and voice their opinions
with each other  and as she has said it is no wonder why no other wives or exwives are posting here to get the help that they need not only do we need suport but so do they

Susan my other half is interested in helping out and she will be sending you a e-mail shortly

Lets all give them a chance   I gave mine a chance and it has worked for the best for me   not all situations will be the same  but we wont know if we dont give them a honest chance
Kristin  &  Pippi doll

I have wondered the same thing as I have been looking through all the forums also and when you go into the soTalk you always see names but you never see anyone talking so you move on, I'am an SO and still have'nt found other..chrerry

[LynnER]

  I have wondered the same thing as I have been looking through all the forums also and when you go into the soTalk you always see names but you never see anyone talking so you move on, I'am an SO and still have'nt found other..chrerry

When you go to the chat rooms, dont just go to #SOTalk, try going into the general #Chat
Most people including SO's spend most of there time in that room and then branch off from there when they find someone they wish to speak with alittle more privatly, while still in a public forum...

[chrerry]

  Hi my name is chrerry and I'm the SO of a CD and I find the same thing, I haven't seen any other SO either, but I can tell you I don't want it to go away, I love my CD with all my heart and will always be here for them..chrerry

[candie]

I get the impression most SO's don't really want anything to do with "trangender discussion" and "support" and would much prefer it just all go away . . .

Honestly, this site saved my young relationship with my boyfriend. I'm an SO of a FTM (yet to transition). We've been together just short of two years, and when I found this place last year, it opened my eyes. I know I don't wish it would just all go away, I mean, it pains me to see him hurt but that is only natural. I want to support him, and it makes me sad to think of the relationships where people are misunderstanding, and unsupportive. There certianly are SO's that are supportive. And I hope I am one of them to him.

Just last night, we were looking at binders online together.

[kristinrichann]

candie
if you mean corsetts we went to timless trends and we are both very pleased with thier products
even their warrenty is the best
we dont were them just for the figure but to inhance our clothing also  looks good wearing them over the right clothing also
just currious how long have you known about your partner   my So who is now my sister was hurt angery confused betrayed, etc  but she had the determanition to learn more about this  and has been a great suport for me also  we have been suporting each other sence my transition started not to mention that we have been having fun doing things togeather as sisters would shoping hair make-up men etc.
I want to say that it is nice that you are suporting her   she will need alot of suport as time goes on 
but please Do Not! forget about your self  I am shure that you are going through your own fealings
this will not be easy on eather of you there will be tough times ahead but hang in there  but dont let her drage you down
I realy hope that the both of you can come to have a great friendship that will continue through out time as she grows    you will also find that you will grow in many different ways    make shure that she goes to see a gender counsler  this is the most imprortant step in her life  do not allow excusses   you can find out so much imformation out here and even on the internet  but it will help a little in creating a few answers   the main answers that your partner needs to find are inside herself 
I want to say that it is nice to see that there is someone else that is learning and has the want to learn more and be suportive
good luck
Kristin & Pippy

[candie]

kristin + pippy,
thank you for your response. i know times ahead will be hard, but even for bio. male/bio. female relationships, it's not always easy. i know we'll have specific battles others don't, but that is okay, though nothing is ever set in stone, i plan to be there with him for a very long time, and i intend to do my best.

i have to say though, it is him. He is a FTM. for him we are looking into binders, he was thinking about t-kingdom, we just need to get money in a form we can pay for it now. haha, i'm the one that is enthrawled by corsetts, they do look good on people, i'm glad you and your sister have found them, and enjoy them.

and i never indend to forget about myself. even already, i know the importance of me. i plan to care after him when he needs me, and do for him what i can, but only if he plans to do the same for me. and he knows that, and i do believe intends to do so.

oh, and i've known since i think a few weeks before we got together, or just shortly thereafter. he remarked before how early on he felt ready to tell me, or well, that he wanted to tell me.

he know's he'll eventually need to see a counseler.. but right now he is in college... and not only doesnt have a way to get to one, but really doesn't have the money to pay for it.

but yes, it is always nice to see people that are willing to support the ones they love.

-candace.

[kristinrichann]

there are counslers that work on what they call a sliding scale and this realy helps  and even in most schools there are a few counslers that do have a little gender knowlage  I realy do wish the best for the both of you    counseling is ever so important in all this   I am sorry I mised what you said on the FtM  I got that flu back and it has me realy screwed up blurry eyes congestion fever and all  this has been a bad year for colds and flu for everyone  both of you have a happy easter and I hope that the wrabbit doesnt miss you
Kristin & Pippy

[tekla]

There are other sites that seem more devoted to the SO question and issues.  Private boards often hurt the whole by the way.  Several of those sites, have suffered a loss in members and postings due to divisions.

[candie]

Really though, I think this site does rather well for SO's ... like I said, it's really helped me. I've never felt I couldn't post something, for fear of any group seeing it. I can see how private boards could be negative, especially since, sometimes, the only people that can answer the question an SO might be asking, is another TG person, or whatnot, but it may be something the SO wants a bigger opinion on than just that of their own SO, or that they aren't sure how to ask their own SO.

I like how everyone is allowed to post on here. It gives every bodies side, and I think that is really good. If we blocked people out, we might get a one sided idea of some things, especially people who are new to concepts. I think having everyone in one space keeps everything well rounded.

[kristinrichann]

it is good that it is open for the SO and their partners  I realy do feel that they need to hear the truth about all this not just from one sorce but from all points  but most of the SO that my sis has im'd with say they feel like this is not their board  (some know her from the dolls that she makes and ships world wide) they have been seeing others post here and they feel that they cant be open with each other  not to mention that the anger, betrayal and confusion that they feel is just continuing   they say that they do need imformation but at the same time they are worried that it might not be a SO (as it was put on the internet you can be anyone you want to be) that they are couminicating with   they also need to be able to share their feelings with each other with-out the interfearance  I for one can understand this because I know the hurt that I did to my SO. (I for one can not even begin to tell let alone show her just how sorry I realy am for what I did to her by not being honest with her let alone to myself)   there are many sides to this coin  and I realy feel we realy need to respect their privicy just as in a way we also need it    we think that the only time that we should post here is when we are asked for  but this is Pippy's and my belief that is what make it nice that there are different view points with out the hatred here (in most cases)  but you will have that no matter were you go
but Pippy has also seen the destruction that has been done to SO's on other boards and she has droped off them because of this  I cant blame her she has enough to deal with with out more confusion
we would like to see more SO's post here not just for them to learn but to deal with their own confusion
also we also might be able to learn something from them
just a thought not meaning to step on any toes  I do not post here with out my SO with me so she knows what is being said and she has the ability to also say her piece
ya all have a happy easter
Kristin & Pippy

[tekla]

Of the very few things I've ever learned in life, one is not to get involved in other people's relationship issues.  I can listen and nod at the right moments, but beyond that, there are only three choices.  Stay and learn to love it, stay and be bitter and hateful, or get on with it and get out.

[TamTam]

This board has helped me, too.  Mostly on the information front, but also just.. as a bit of reassurance, I suppose.

[tekla]

I think that is its best feature, to see inside a bit, unvarnished, unpolished, but people expressing what is in their hearts.