Acceptance is more fun than passing

[SarahFaceDoom]

Re: Acceptance is more fun than passing

The above statement doesn't make sense.....

if you pass then you are accepted...if you don't pass you are not accepted.....

Both of those statements I believe to be wrong.  So I don't agree with you conclusion.  Passing is something you do with strangers on a bus.  Acceptance is something you do with friends in a hug.  Hugs with friends is more fun than Strangers on a Bus.  Therefore acceptance is more fun than passing.

[fluffy jorgen]

What if one of the strangers on the bus wants a hug? =(

oh no....its not the smelly guy wearing the 'northern exposure' hat, is it?

LMAO.
i'll be the first in line to hug this stranger. (not!)

[debbie.j]

Don't you think that grumpy men with Northern Exposure hats get lonely too?

He's a human being!

yup they do  redfish

[cindybc]

ROFL Ashley Michelle, maybe your post wasn't meant to be serious but it made me laugh. As for hugging any one, I do so without hesitation when I see someone who could use a hug. At least I never found it necessary to carry a brick in my purse. Like this bag lady that was in the restaurant where Wing Walker and I went to have supper a couple nights ago. We did the best we could to help her out. That lady touched me inside and found it difficult to hold back the tears. Before we left I gave her a hug and I could feel her frailty. She beamed at our show of kindliness and I could feel the warmth coming from her. But then I have a sense for these people. I have worked with such people many a times during the twenty years I worked as a social worker.

Cindy   

[Dawn Labelle]

Re: Acceptance is more fun than passing

The above statement doesn't make sense.....

if you pass then you are accepted...if you don't pass you are not accepted.....therefor it's much better to pass....

One can be accepted even if they are not viewed as a natal woman, and one can be rejected even if they are a natal woman, passing has nothing to do with being accepted.

The only way that passing == acceptance is when people dont know who or what they are accepting, in which case its not acceptance, its ignorance.

Its also pretty ->-bleeped-<-ty to say that unless you can pass you'll never be accepted.

Renate got it right IMO

Dawn

[cindybc]

All I have found that I need most is to have an upbeat personality with folks, you then can project to them what you want them to see and be accepted. *Passing,* well passing depends on how other folks perceive me to be. Been doing it for 8 years so I know it works.

Cindy 

[Berliegh]

Re: Acceptance is more fun than passing

The above statement doesn't make sense.....

if you pass then you are accepted...if you don't pass you are not accepted.....therefor it's much better to pass....

One can be accepted even if they are not viewed as a natal woman, and one can be rejected even if they are a natal woman, passing has nothing to do with being accepted.

The only way that passing == acceptance is when people dont know who or what they are accepting, in which case its not acceptance, its ignorance.

Its also pretty ->-bleeped-<-ty to say that unless you can pass you'll never be accepted.

Renate got it right IMO

Dawn

I see where you are coming from Dawn.....but what I meant earlier was that if you don't pass you wouldn't be accepted as a genetic female......but I agree with your point that people can be won over by someone's personality, character and confidence no matter how they might be percieved...

[tekla]

The best "people persons" I know teach others how to deal with them, rather than leaving it to chance.

[buttercup]

Why does everything have to require some stupid hierarchy?

Acceptance is fine, passing is fine, acceptance while not passing is fine, acceptance while passing is fine. Who cares otherwise?

So true..... so true.         

[debbie.j]

Why does everything have to require some stupid hierarchy?

Acceptance is fine, passing is fine, acceptance while not passing is fine, acceptance while passing is fine. Who cares otherwise?

So true..... so true.         

indeed so very true

[Jordan]

Hi all:

Acceptance is more fun than passing.

Being perceived as a woman and therefore being treated as a woman is mundane and obvious.

Being perceived as a transsexual and being treated as a person shows how wonderful the world can be.

Let the fun begin.

Renate

I totally disagree with that statement Renate ......I would never want to be percieved as a transsexual when I'm out doing my shopping thank you very much...

I only ever get seen as a boy dressed like a girl in public, its so very nice when the sales people dont care though and love to show me nice things, they understand I have relatively no idea WTF im doing, thats acceptance and it feels so much better than passing to me...

Then again I dont really know what passing is like sooo...

[shanetastic]

Hi all:

Acceptance is more fun than passing.

Being perceived as a woman and therefore being treated as a woman is mundane and obvious.

Being perceived as a transsexual and being treated as a person shows how wonderful the world can be.

Let the fun begin.

Renate

I totally disagree with that statement Renate ......I would never want to be percieved as a transsexual when I'm out doing my shopping thank you very much...

I only ever get seen as a boy dressed like a girl in public, its so very nice when the sales people dont care though and love to show me nice things, they understand I have relatively no idea WTF im doing, thats acceptance and it feels so much better than passing to me...

Then again I dont really know what passing is like sooo...

Now the real question though!  Are you sure they only see a boy dressed like a girl!?!? 

[Dawn Labelle]

I only ever get seen as a boy dressed like a girl in public, its so very nice when the sales people dont care though and love to show me nice things, they understand I have relatively no idea WTF im doing, thats acceptance and it feels so much better than passing to me...

Then again I dont really know what passing is like sooo...

I totally agree hun, thats what I want for acceptance, passable or not and I can pass to a certain extent. In my experience, I've found that the more I accept myself and the less guilt / shame / fear that I feel over what I am that the less and less I care about passing. Passing is terribly overrated in an open society..... now being trans in some parts of the world passing is equal to survival, but thats another story entirely.

Dawn

[GypsyKaren]

I'm a Post-Op and I rarely "pass", and I probably never will without FFS (which I'm now considering). Would if I could, wish though I might, it just doesn't happen to often, such is my fate in life. What makes it up for me is a returned smile from another woman, to me that's acceptance and her way of saying "hi sister", that always lights me up and it happens all the time.

Another cool thing about it is a lot of women get to asking me questions about being TS and having the surgery, I think it's a great way for me to educate people about us, and I have to say that I get very positive feedback from the vast majority of them. A lot of them think that what I've done is pretty cool, so I'll take that form of acceptance anytime and everytime, and it always leaves me smiling. Men just give me weird looks and move away like I'm contagious or something, but that just cracks me up.

There are a few times when I get the giggles from some idiots, but hey, idiots aren't worth my time or worry, so I just give them a great big smile and keep on doing whatever I'm up to, and I think them seeing that they're having no effect on me bothers them more than anything, I just love it!

Karen Starlene

[Tanya1]

^ Yea- don't let some idiots put you down! They only do that to make themselves feel good and to escape their pathetic low lives.

Keep living

[cindybc]

Hi GypsyKaren

Looks like you have your own little system at work and if it works that is well and good. I have my own similar system on how to interact with the nutes out there then be it as it should. As for passing I believe it is as simple as projecting, projecting to others what you want them to see. I to tell the truth don't really pass that well but I have not been sired for the past seven years I been on full time. Of course my attitude and personality have much to do with it as well. I am always ready without hesitation to go do what ever I can to help someone who is in need. Just be careful hon when you venture out there.

Cindy

[noeleena]

hi ...being accepted .  passing .  the voice then letting you down .  when i am talking to people & i am in full female mode    strange  as it may sound my voice goes up i dont think to do it   its just me .  i did not think i would ..pass..as such .   the thing for me is as you know i am both m & f .   as i have accepted my self for who i am its not a prob.   its not as it seems for others  who i deal with .   some   are you on homones had s r s  or what ever dont dispair just be your self it takes time to work out .  just a thought any way.....noeleena....