I worked some masculine jobs like trailbuilding and carpentry.
While I learned some useful skills, I hated how I was treated.
I was always told to be more man, less girly girl.
I was told that if I wasn't as strong as the others I just wasn't trying hard enough, and that I was lazy or not a hard worker.
I couldn't lift the things they could, I never have been able to.
It's very difficult for me to get any sort of upper body strength.
I've always been rather small and timid.
So it realy hurt, and when I would get frustrated to the point of tears, they would feel sorry for me but then later fire me for some reason or another.
It was always the same story.
I only did those jobs because I needed the money and they paid well.
They were real torture, physically and otherwise.
I hated it.
I hated not being able to express myself.
But it paid well so I put up with it.
I eventually had enough.
I couldn't take it any more.
I broke down.
I had to come out, and I had tostop doing those sorts of things.
That's why I started going to school, I needed to do somthing else.
I couldn't keep doing that the way it was going.
I'm sorry to ramble like that.
Sara
