Easing in

[Rowan_Danielle]

I'm sticking my toe into the water now, testing a pool of life that has intrigued me for decades.

While I'm male, I have long had a feminine side that has, when I was young, been a problem.

I was the kid that didn't like fighting.  I'd rather talk my way out of a problem if possible.  If not, I would avoid the issue.  (But I usually managed to avoid things that resulted in fighting, attempting to stay on reasonable terms with all.)

I was the kid that emphasized with characters in books, movies and songs, to the point that I would cry during certain songs and movies.  It has gotten more intense over the years, now that I have kids.  (Think of how bad it was in third grade, as a boy, crying because of the sad ending to a popular song.)

I was the kid that could barely throw a base ball, catch a football, run the hurdles or anything else like that.  Heck, sports bored me.  I'd rather read a book.  About the only thing I could do better than any boy was high kick.  (I can still do that, even after all these years.  Just not as high, relatively speaking.)

When circumstances put me in a junior high class full of girls, I was quite comfortable gossiping with them and being one of the 'girls', as much as a guy could be.  Since the class was in a different environment, there wasn't much peer pressure from the male side, thank goodness.  (I can still do things like that, on the bus and in office environments.)

I consider myself to have an artistic side, one that dabbles in writing, photography, crafts and clothing design.  In the household, I'm the one that people come to when they are dealing with design decisions involving shape, color and pattern.  While I know males seem to dominate writing and photography, females tend to be firmly entrenched in crafts and parts of clothing design.

When I do role playing in various genres, Dungeons and Dragons, Champions, BESM, I tend to prefer female characters.  They fit my mindset and allow me to be female while being in character.  (The fellow gamers have been a little scared how well I play the part.)

I'm comfortable enough as a male, most of the time.  But I have often wondered whether I would be more comfortable as a female.

Over the past few weeks I have been easing in to the TG/TS community by looking over websites, printing articles and picking up information about the topic.  Now I'm ready to go in a little deeper.

Any suggestions?

[cindybc]

Hi Rowan and welcome to Susan's. I do pray that you will find the answers to any questions you may find a need to ask. Role playing! Wow! I don't believe in coincidence but I do synchronicity. I was just sharing such similar ideas with another individual on another thread. I use to love role playing especially mainly female characters. I do not do role playing anymore because I have a soul mate living with me. I have been living full time as a woman for the past seven years and my Soul mate has been living as a woman for the past five years. But I will say that role playing if no more it was the only way I could alleviate or deal with the GID problem at the time. Have yourself a wonderful evening.

Cindy 

[Rowan_Danielle]

Hi Rowan and welcome to Susan's. I do pray that you will find the answers to any questions you may find a need to ask. Role playing! Wow! I don't believe in coincidence but I do synchronicity. I was just sharing such similar ideas with another individual on another thread. I use to love role playing especially mainly female characters. I do not do role playing anymore because I have a soul mate living with me. I have been living full time as a woman for the past seven years and my Soul mate has been living as a woman for the past five years. But I will say that role playing if no more it was the only way I could alleviate or deal with the GID problem at the time. Have yourself a wonderful evening.

Cindy 

Thanks for the encouragement Cindy.

[Hazumu]

Hi, Rowan-Danielle;

It didn't say in your introduction -- have you gone out en femme?  How you take to that is a good indicator.  Basically, does presenting as female seem somehow right?  If it does, that's a clue.

Beyond that there is a lot of resource here at Susan's.

Two books that helped me at the start were 'True Selves' (don't remember the author) and 'Gender Outlaw' by Kate Bornstein.  Recently, I finished "Whipping Girl, by Julia Serano.

Plus you can use the Wiki here and post questions in the forums.

Oh boy! as the first staff member to greet you, I get to introduce you to the Terms of Service.  Please read them.  The most important points are: no ad-hominem attacks (attack the idea not the person,) and no HRT dosage information -- HRT is serious business and, although the information is available on other sites, Susan's Place does not want to contribute to people self-medicating.

Now, take your shoes off, put on your favorite lounger, fill your coffee cup (we'll get a hook with your name soon,) and let us get to know you!

Karen

[Rowan_Danielle]

I haven't gone out en femme yet.  I'm one of those timid types.

I'll definitely need to see about those books.  Trying to get my mind around this mind set will take some time.  Seeing how others have made the journey may help I suspect.

I believe I have read the Terms of Service prior to registering. 

Keeping HRT info off the forum is good sense and something I would be in favor of automatically.  I'm one of those who prefers minimal medication.

As far as attacking ideas and not people, I'm one of those who believes in the original Golden Rule.  (Not the one that goes "He who has the gold makes the rules.")  I do my best not to attack people since friendly persuasion does a better job in the long run.  And as far as attacking ideas, I prefer to question the ones I disagree with, rather than attacking them.  There are many ways to the same results.

[drkprincess]

Hi Rowan, it was nice meeting you and hope to see you around.
And welcome to Susans :-D

~Rachel~

[funnygrl]

Hi ya Rowan and Welcome as well!!! i really identified with a lot of things in your post (no fighting, talking your way out and or avoiding it entirely, music, artistic side).

I say JUMP IN!!!!

Hope you find all the information you need, i know i did. glad you're here!!!

[Rowan_Danielle]

Hi Rowan, it was nice meeting you and hope to see you around.
And welcome to Susans :-D

~Rachel~

I'll definitely be around, though times may vary, especially on the weekends.

I did have fun last night, getting a feel for the chat on this site.  Your use of the more advanced features (rubs her rear where she was bit) gives me lots of ideas for ways of interacting.

Posted on: February 25, 2008, 09:46:13 AM

Hi ya Rowan and Welcome as well!!! i really identified with a lot of things in your post (no fighting, talking your way out and or avoiding it entirely, music, artistic side).

I say JUMP IN!!!!

Hope you find all the information you need, i know i did. glad you're here!!!

I'm thinking about jumping in, but it will be a shallow puddle or tide pool at the edge of the ocean of change.  Before I jump into a deeper spot, I want to pin things down as far as where I'm heading.

I'm definitely open to suggestions though.

Oh, as an addition to the original post, one of the things I remember vividly when I was a kid was working with my younger sister and a neighbor girl on a Barbie fashion show.  We set up a stage, with different colors of lighting, using a chair, a desk lamp, blankets and some toys could be put under the lamp to change the colors.

[drkprincess]

I am not a room moderator but I would been glad to help you out with any questions you have about chat. I have been in IRC all over the internet for many years, Guess that makes me a chatoholic LoL

~Rachel~

[tekla]

I think we have to be very careful with sexual stereotypes.  To wit.

I was the kid that didn't like fighting  - Most of the men I know don't like it either.  However, 30 years in nighclubs have introduced me to some women who do really love opening a can of WhoopAss on someone.  And they are very feminine girls too.  I'm our crews resident 'girly man' as our Gov would have it, and I'm one of the first to wade into a brawl.  You can never tell.


I was the kid that could barely throw a base ball, catch a football, run the hurdles or anything else like that.  Heck, sports bored me.  I'd rather read a book.  - I love to read, and have read a whole lot in my life.  But I like physical activity too.  I live to ski.  And two of my best friends, the two biggest sports nuts I know, are both girls, one played NCAA Division 1 softball on one of the top teams, the other ran track and hold records at her college.  Both are medical doctors, so it was not all brawn over brains. Again, you can never tell.

While I know males seem to dominate writing and photography, females tend to be firmly entrenched in crafts and parts of clothing design.  The biggest selling fiction book in the US is still Little Women, by Louise May Alcott.  And Bill Blass, Michael Kors, Marc Jacobs, Ralph Lauren, Valentino Garavani, Tom Ford, and lots of men run the fashion industry.  Most of the hottest new designers this year are men.

[Rowan_Danielle]

I think we have to be very careful with sexual stereotypes.  To wit.

I was the kid that didn't like fighting  - Most of the men I know don't like it either.  However, 30 years in nighclubs have introduced me to some women who do really love opening a can of WhoopAss on someone.  And they are very feminine girls too.  I'm our crews resident 'girly man' as our Gov would have it, and I'm one of the first to wade into a brawl.  You can never tell.


I was the kid that could barely throw a base ball, catch a football, run the hurdles or anything else like that.  Heck, sports bored me.  I'd rather read a book.  - I love to read, and have read a whole lot in my life.  But I like physical activity too.  I live to ski.  And two of my best friends, the two biggest sports nuts I know, are both girls, one played NCAA Division 1 softball on one of the top teams, the other ran track and hold records at her college.  Both are medical doctors, so it was not all brawn over brains. Again, you can never tell.

While I know males seem to dominate writing and photography, females tend to be firmly entrenched in crafts and parts of clothing design.  The biggest selling fiction book in the US is still Little Women, by Louise May Alcott.  And Bill Blass, Michael Kors, Marc Jacobs, Ralph Lauren, Valentino Garavani, Tom Ford, and lots of men run the fashion industry.  Most of the hottest new designers this year are men.

Good points with good examples.  I'll try to keep such in mind.

When I fail to, blame it on growing up in a world when TV was young and TV programs were stereotypes.  In today's world, things are a heck of a lot more flexible.

[tekla]

Be yourself, all else follows from that.

And in the US, Title IX created a whole generation of female sports stars, some of which are damn awesome.

[cindybc]

Hi, Sometimes I really get lazy and don't do much more then sit behind this computer, especially during the gloomy winter months. But here is an accounting of an adventure I had yesterday.

Hi, (a friend from another group) since there is only you here and I am sitting here alone I may as well recount my  adventures of the day to you. I guess I am one of those who does not know how to just sit and relax. I am just to active to just sit around doing nothing. I need to be doing things. Like today is, I mean, "wow!" one of those poster card perfect sunny mild days. It must be close to 60F out there. I went for a long walk, and I mean a looooong walk. Every place I saw along the way kept reminding my of the kind of places I would go in to mess around all day when I was a kid.

There was this small river that runs through a bushy area and I just had to go explore it. There were a couple of plaques in there giving the history of the place. They told of how this guy, Johnson was the first citizen of the area to produce hydro power. This back in the eighties going back when this township of Surrey ws mostly woods, and now is mostly all built up. (

Well this Johnson guy built a dam, wheelbarrowing all the stones himself from a near by stone quarry, and then build a water wheel from the instructions he got in a book. Well it turned out he was able to produce enough power for his work shop, home and a few neighboring houses. There was only one hitch he discovered, the river was one of the main routes that the salmon used to get up to their spawning ground which was located in the woods on the other side of the bridge that ran behind a row of houses and appeared to empty in what appeared to be a large pond in the woods, ya I followed it, I love walking in the woods.

Anyway, our entrepreneur discovered the salmon in the spring could not get past his dam. So here again our entrepreneur took to start building a water ladder made of stones so the Salmon could get over his dam. It took him a year to accomplish this feat and it worked. I love exploring historical places. "Wow!" what a super day this was, I feel like a shaggy haired little girl that just come out from exploring an enchanted forest for most of the day. I swear I think I'm getting younger instead of older.

Seven years into the making this sixty + years grandmother settin here like a little kid waiting for the next adventure to come her way.

Cindy

[Rowan_Danielle]

Cindy:

A wonderful adventure.  I like spontaneous things like that.  And historical markers, especially if they deal with local events and ideas that were years ahead of their time.

Johnson sounds like John Muir, one of the founders of the Sierra Club.  Muir started out as an inventor and entrepreneur himself.  But things happened and he became one of the early environmentalists, a person whose actions have made the world a better place.

Without Muir and other like him, Mother Earth would be in sad, sad shape.

May you enjoy other adventures like this.

Rowan

[cindybc]

Hi Rowan, thank you. I just have a roaming mind and sometimes when I can't go out on an adventure like that I do it in my imagination and type it out into my word pad. But yes the moto is that you don't have to feel you won't be able to follow some passions you had as a man. I knew on 75 year old GG whose passion was building things and maintaining all the gardening of her large back yard. I knew a couple of other trans girls who kept up with their favorite hobbies they had as males after they transitioned.. I had a friend, a girl, who was tinier then I am who loved to come with me to do minor carpentry work I performed around town where I lived. Although I have very much feminised and do not have the upper body strength I had I am still quite active.

Cindy 

[tinkerbell]

Hello Rowan and welcome to Susan's!

Thank you for your introduction.  Please take a few moments to get familiar with all the boards of the site, review the site rules before posting, and take advantage of our many resources such as the wiki, chat, and the links listed at the main page.  We look forward to your future posts and participation.  Enjoy your stay

tink