Hello, Michael, and welcome back to Susan's. Since I didn't meet you earlier, it's nice to meet you.
Feeling like a kind male isn't all that unusual. I'm quite a bit older than you so it took a whole lot longer for me to be able to go from a kind male to a kind woman.
When I was about 12 or 13 I had to "buy" the gender role that society had established for those born with "Male" as their gender identifier. I was anything but typical. I had learned to live like my dad showed by his example. I had a strong faith in a Supreme Being. I also wanted the same qualities of honor, caring, generosity, and consideration as any girl would find in a boy (me) who, along with his dad, had parts of a Boy Scout and Sir Galahad inside of him. If I had to be a male I was determined to be the best male there was, but I had my conflicts, too.
I was ready to belong to a girl as her steady when I was 13. At 15 I was ready to commit to marriage to a high school sweetheart. I was regarded as a true friend, a good date, and, as the girls I dated said, I was a "nice guy" and "trustworthy."
Point: Being kind and being known as kind will serve you well regardless of your gender identity. Acts of kindness know no gender. I had that confirmed earlier today when I was at the supermarket.
I had all of my groceries emptied from my cart onto the conveyor. I turned to see a man who looked to be about my age (I'm 56) who had three items in his hands. I asked him to cut in the line ahead of me. He was thoroughly surprised and wasn't sure of what to say besides "thank you!" He did say that "gentlepeople" are harder to find each day, and that we are from the "old school." I smiled and bid him a fine evening, and my evening was better as a result.
My apologies for yakking too much here. Please feel free to pm me if you so desire.
All the best,
Wing Walker
Glad I Changed Course When I Did