Hi Spike
Welcome to the forum. I am post transition of 15 yrs ago, and am married to a woman that has never been around the gay scene or anything other than a very conservative life style. She did not know me when I was young and transitioning, she only knows the life we have together, and it is a pretty hum drum normal life lol...that is to give you hope.
We are friends with other couples, though they do not live near us currently, they did at one time. They have a normal hum drum hetero life as well. We have always thought it interesting that people would think our lives are any diff than other strait couples, truth is it is not. Not even a little bit...ok, wait, with medical issues it can be, because I have the stress of new doctors etc. other than that though, nope.
You ask about the girls verses mens with friendships. That is a tricky question to out right answer, but believe it or not it is quite normal for men to have more females for friends than males for friends, I know a LOT of men that have that as the case in their lives and they did not transition.
As for making friends with males...that is sort of complicated in the beginning. If he looks 14 it will be something he will sort of grow out of anyway. I never looked that young, but I had a buddy that had that issue, being short and looking a lot younger than he was. For me I look a little younger than I am now, but that is if I shave my beard, if I have my beard I look a little older lol...sucks for me! I wish I looked younger!!
I can tell you this...from every guy I ever met that was trans, we ALL went through a period of time for say the first two years or so.... that we go out and do all the things we feel we were cheated on, hence,, paintball, and playing with things that had been so out of our reach. It is like the testostrone turns on a deep rooted need to anyway lol...but it is all a part of puberty and puberty is exactly what he is going through! There needs to be a balance of course with playing and responsiblity, and some are better at it than others lol...but it can all be fun. And your support will be a big help as he goes out and experiences new things.
In time yes, he will make some male friends. There is some socialization skills that will need to be fine tuned to some degree, and he will know them when he hits up against them. They are often very suttle, but he will notice it immediately and adjust accordingly, until it just becomes a part of his nature. That takes time.
Sounds to me like you all have a wonderful life to look foward to, and he and you both are blessed to have each other. I am sure you know that!
Feel free to write anytime, there are people that will assist you here! For the most part in no time at all you will figure out that you are just as normal as any other couple out there and life will just flow...
Welcome!!
Peace,
Taylor
