So, um, hello! Let's see, I guess I'll get the Life Story part out of the way first:
I'm the oldest of three with two little brothers. I was always very jealous of them as a child. I hated wearing the dresses my mother picked out for me. All my friends were boys. When I dressed myself I wore jeans and baggy sweatshirts with a baseball cap. I never played with dolls or had toys that were traditionally feminine. I think my parents actually did a pretty good job in that regard-- I wanted to play sports and build things so I did; my brother wanted to play with dolls and play dress-up so he did. That sort of thing. I never really fit in with the kids at school and I was labeled "tomboy" or "gay". In high school, I cut my hair very short and was often mistaken for a guy (which was both pleasant and embarrassing at the same time). In college, my wardrobe became a little more feminine as I started wearing more fitted tops but I still buy all my pants, coats, and shoes from the men's section. I shaved my head a couple of years ago and rocked the GI Jane thing for a little while but now my hair is growing long again mostly due to sheer laziness. I stopped shaving my legs a couple of years ago, which was really freeing, but I still can't stand the look of hairy armpits. Not sure why. I'm currently engaged to a wonderful guy who is incredibly supportive. We've been together for about 3.5 years. I've never really fully identified with either male or female. Sometimes I feel very masculine and other times I feel very feminine. Most of my friends are still guys and I like being considered "one of the guys" but I don't always think of myself as masculine. "Girl" just doesn't fit me. Neither does "boy", I guess. So, yeah. I'm not really sure where I fall on any kind of gender continuum. Until fairly recently (past few months) I hadn't even really explored all these thoughts. I had always just pushed them to the back. It's confusing and frustrating and it's me.
