If you can't convince them, confuse them. (Or, what to do about my voice?)

[Jamie-o]

I experimented for the first time trying to pass in public today.  Went to Walmart.  First clerk I encountered sir-ed me. (Yay!)  Then I opened my mouth and she immediately switched to Ma'am and apologized profusely. 

Then I went to try on some clothes and the clerk put me in the handicapped changing room.  At first I didn't realize why she chose that one until a little bit later when I saw her surreptitiously checking to see what department I was shopping in.  When I came back she put me in the men's.

So, mixed but encouraging results.  I was afraid I would be totally unable to pass.  Seems my voice is still a problem, though.  I don't have a particularly high voice, for a gal (that's always the caveat), but it has always has a definite presence about it that says "WOMAN!"  I remember in 8th grade I was in the school musical and everybody else in the cast sounded like kids -- pleasantly androgynous -- and here I was with this big Julie Andrews wannabe voice that made me very uncomfortable.  I'm told I spent my entire solo making faces. lol 

Anyway, does anybody have any suggestion for how I can try to masculinize my voice, without it sounding as if that's what I'm trying to do. (Don't want to be the equivalent of those guys who dress in drag for Halloween and talk in some ridiculous falsetto.  )

[_Kris_]

Well, you just gotta remember that not all males have deep, manly voices, either. Really, I believe that it all just comes down to confidence, and the way in which you carry yourself. Sure, you're not going to want to burst out in high-pitched, feminine giggles, but you don't have to try to dramatically deepen your voice, either, since that will only have the opposite effect, and people will suspect something is up.

And congratulations on the passes, even if they weren't 100%.

[Elincubus]

I have the same problem as Jamie-o (just in case anybody has some more tips ). I searched the internet but feel a bit let down in that aspect. Either the articles are only about MTFs or they don't say more than "FTM have less problems with the voice than MTF because T masculinices it".
I mean that's great prospects but what are guys like me to do who are still far away from transtition?

It would also be more complicated for me to see if I pass because in my language there isn't an equivalent of "sir" or "mam" that's used almost constantly.

[Ender]

Then I went to try on some clothes and the clerk put me in the handicapped changing room.  At first I didn't realize why she chose that one until a little bit later when I saw her surreptitiously checking to see what department I was shopping in.  When I came back she put me in the men's.

Lol, that sounds familiar.  Changing rooms are a pretty quick way to tell if you pass--looks-wise, that is.  I remember trying to go to the female side of a Wal-Mart changing room 'cuz my mom was with me and I wasn't out to her yet.  The changing room lady looked at me kinda astonished and said firmly: "young man, <i>your</i> dressing room is over there" *pointing to the mens*  Made for awkward times with my mum... 

After having this happen a few more times, I just started heading straight to the mens side, with no objection from whoever was working there.  I would consider my voice un-passable, but if you head confidently over to the guys side of a dressing room and answer any questions (ie, how many items) with short answers in a bit of a monotone... well, I've had no problems. 

Like you, I have a fairly deep voice (for a female), but still not in a clearly male range.  I think the tipping point between "androgynous" (or pre-pubertal boy) and "female" comes down to enunciation--perhaps you know about this already, but guys and girls really do pronounce words differently.  I'm sure there are exceptions, but on the average, males seem to have far less fluctuation in pitch when pronouncing words.  It's kinda hard to describe, but just give a listen to males and females conversing and you should be able to hear that there is more to how a guy talks than just a deeper voice--the words sound 'flatter,' almost more direct, and do not have that slight increase in pitch at the end that many females seem to put in.

On a side-note, I remember waay back in junior high during those awkward-as-heck adolescent days when I was still trying to figure myself out.  I noticed that there was a definite difference in how I spoke and how other females spoke.  I also noticed that these females got far fewer odd looks when they spoke than when I did, so I tried to emulate the way they fluctuated pitch when they talked.  It did work, as I got less strange looks and overall people responded more positively to me, almost as if my original monotone was considered 'rude,' and my female imitation was interpreted as 'nicer.'  Needless to say, I'm now working on cutting that acquired "accent" of sorts out of my speech.

[Nero]

I have the same problem as Jamie-o (just in case anybody has some more tips ). I searched the internet but feel a bit let down in that aspect. Either the articles are only about MTFs or they don't say more than "FTM have less problems with the voice than MTF because T masculinices it".
I mean that's great prospects but what are guys like me to do who are still far away from transtition?

It would also be more complicated for me to see if I pass because in my language there isn't an equivalent of "sir" or "mam" that's used almost constantly.

your language? just curious. your english is good.

[Elincubus]

your language? just curious. your english is good.

Thank you, I love the English language a lot. I'm from Austria and a German native speaker.
Hadn't much luck with my English teachers but read very much.

[Luc]

I hate to tell you guys this, but try as you might to lower your voices, nothing will work apart from testosterone. I thought I could do it myself, thought my voice was plenty low, thought I passed incredibly well (since I was always fairly masculine-looking), but I finally got to the point where I wanted T, and I've never been happier. Within about a month & a half my voice was entirely passable as male, and at almost 4 months now it's nice and low, and I have a ton of facial hair. I haven't had the slightest difficulty passing in at least 2 months. It's a wonder drug, totally.

Sebastien

[Jamie-o]

I think the tipping point between "androgynous" (or pre-pubertal boy) and "female" comes down to enunciation--perhaps you know about this already, but guys and girls really do pronounce words differently. 

So, dude, you're saying I should totally try out my Cali skater boy imitation?  That's a hella phat idea, dude!  (You'll have to imagine the actual skater boy accent.  It's there.  Really!) 

No, I will give that some thought.  Since I look about 15 in boy mode, I'm going to have to listen to how young guys are talking these days.

Elincubus:  Ihr Englisch ist sehr gut.  Viel, viel besser als mein Deutsch! 

[zombiesarepeaceful]

Actually I've tried to lower my voice since I transitioned...it's been about a year and a half....and my voice is definitely lower, and I now have a noticable adam's apple that wasn't there before. So, I believe it can be done. My voice was already pretty low to begin with, but definitely not male. With practice it became easier to talk in a deeper voice. For some people it may be obvious that you're trying to talk lower but I haven't been told this by people I've talked to. It's not naturally lower now by any means. I could still produce the same voice that I had before I transitioned, but it's more natural now to talk with a lower voice. That, and the adam's apple is here to stay

I guess that the easiest way to produce a deeper sounding voice, short of going on T, is to talk from your stomach, not your throat. It takes practice like I said but it was well worth it.

[Elincubus]

Actually I've tried to lower my voice since I transitioned...it's been about a year and a half....and my voice is definitely lower, and I now have a noticable adam's apple that wasn't there before. So, I believe it can be done.

That's really interesting, especially that you actually got an adam's apple just because of that. Gives one some hope too.

[trannyboy]

I transitioned for 2 years without T. I passed because I argued the point. The vast majority of the time people assumed I was male and when anybody said otherwise I just corrected them. I made a joke how people make the mistake all the time and made it clear I was a guy. Unless people were trying to be cruel or had my ID that was the end of it. People don't usually want to argue about your gender. Your voice has less to do with passing then your ability to be total comfortable presenting as male. You must be sure of yourself to convince others. I have seen people who don't look male or female (as the case may be) but they pass without hormones or surgery because they present themselves to the world as a man. If you want to avoid your voice then the tips already given are all I can suggest. Oh and maintain  direct eye contact with people it decrease argument over gender when someone has doubts.


Incidentally everyone male or female has an Adam's Apple, it is your larynx and the cartilage surrounding it. It is more visible in men because they have more muscle pushing it outwards, less fat and slightly different physical structure. A lot of female body builders develop a more visible apple because of extensive training. Mine is very visible when I am in good condition and sort of disappears when I am overweight. At different points it has enabled me to pass and other times it outed me.

->-bleeped-<-boy

[Keira]

While males and females have adams apple, male's is a bit different which makes it stick out.
See the bones on wikipedia for references.

[Dev]

Just to throw in my 2 cents worth.  My therepist tells me I have a neutral voice, so I guess thats a good thing.  I am not on T and won't be for about 2.5 more years.  I try to talk from the stomach as suggested before, but noticed one thing that also helped and could help you also.  Be aware of your natural talking speed. 

I talk very fast, and sometimes people have known me for years have to get me to repeat or slow down.  When I am at the therepist's office I tend to think about what i want to say more then just blurting it out so I talk slower.  I am living currently in a country that's native language is not english, but most speak it, so when I talk to them I have to be very aware of my speed or I get the appoligy and then repeat it again.  When i slow down, my voice gets deeper. 

It's not something people really think about, but it does play a factor in the pitch.  Not sure if this will help you or not, but its worth a shot if you are a fast talker like I am.  I know I never paid attention to it until recently and it's helped me keep my pitch low, yet natural.