Quote from: ->-bleeped-<-boy link=topic=32161.msg223819#msg223819 date=1208202549
I am not sure where to put this but I need to know how many of your therapists want to know about your sex life. Ok I mean yeah basic stuff is normal I guess. I am being forced to see a sexologist and we had our first session last week. The first 15 minutes were normal pay bill and explain her "process". The next 10 were brief partial overview. Then she asked me how often I masturbate to orgasm and things went downhill from there. The rest of the session was me poorly defending my stance that sexuality was private. I couldn't argue my own views without losing any hope of approval and I couldn't pretend to be ok with it. By the end of the session I just wanted to run. I have to go back to get her approval for surgery coverage. I can't be labeled obstructive so next time I will talk all she wants about sex. I don't get this, these are the professionals in 2008 for crying out loud. What the heck does it matter how I touch my partners and myself. I have to watch myself with this woman. I feel like I am dealing with the old gatekeepers and I was never good keeping my tongue around those fools.
->-bleeped-<-boy
I have had that same experience, acctually, when I was 15, seeking testosterone-blockers, and my Gender Therapist wanted a second opinion from a sex therapist buddy of hers. I think I was terrified, already having social anxiety, to meet this virtual stranger, and we introduced ourselves briefly, and her first real question she asks me is "What do you think about when you masturbate", I was really caught offguard because I thought this session would be about my gender. Needless to say, I was very vague, because such subjects are usually seen in our society as private and even "bad". She asked about If I think about other people when I masturbate, who are they/what do they look like/what's their sex, as if it matters, what sex am I when I masturbate, do we use any objects, how often, Grahhh. It was very uncomfortable, I didn't even know her. She offered no real "it's Ok to think about that, it's OK to masturbate" or any kind words really, she was just quizzing me, it was scary.
I wish I had some advice, but I honestly don't know what therapists are getting at when they ask these questions, what I did in that session was basically be as vague as possible, probably frustratingly so, for a solid hour.
"What do you think about when you masturbate"
"Stuff"
"What kind of stuff"
"People"
"What are the people doing"
"Touching, I guess"
Yeah, Imagine an hour of THAT, my gods. This isn't really advice, I can't give any advice, 6 years later I still don't f*ing know what was going through that therapist's mind, maybe it was the payment she would recieve out of pocket for asking me embarrassing questions for an hour.
I have no advice, I can relate, though.
