They gave me female hormones

[Elincubus]

Almost a year ago after my by now one and only time at the gynaecologist, I was prescribed some drug to regulate my menstrual cycle, since I was seventeen and had my period about 4 times a year--I didn't think much of it back then because I hadn't realized my transexuality, now I would definitely refuse.

But that's the point, I began realizing that I'm ftm slowly at the same time, I began taking the drug.
Up to now I never connected this two things, but lately as I begin thinking about hormones and everything, I wondered more and more what exactely they were giving me.
I looked it up know--it's progestagen, definitely a female hormone. I did only take it for some months and the only effect it had on my periode is that it's even less regular now, but I wonder if it affected me mentally somehow.
I keep hearing how hormones make so many people feel better, more right in their body and so I wonder if the female hormones could have somehow done the opposite to me--making me feel worse and thus triggering the realization of my gender identity.

[Just Mandy]

Boy... that's a tough one and I'm not sure that anyone can answer that... I'll be interested in seeing the replies...

All I can offer is a confirmation that hormones do make you feel better, a feeling of things being right for
the first time in my life. Good luck.

Amanda

[Elincubus]

Boy... that's a tough one and I'm not sure that anyone can answer that... I'll be interested in seeing the replies...

Actually, I'm just curious. I would like to know if it had anything to do with my realization and it will be interesting what people here have to say.
But It wouldn't change anything--if the hormones triggered my realization, I'm more than glad I got them prescribed because I know finally know what was 'wrong' with me all my life. If not, well, they didn't harm me.

[Just Mandy]

But It wouldn't change anything--if the hormones triggered my realization, I'm more than glad I got them prescribed because I know finally know what was 'wrong' with me all my life. If not, well, they didn't harm me.

I think that's a very healthy way of looking at it

Amanda

[Dennis]

It could be, Elion. I went on the pill at 19 for a year and I recall that was the first time after puberty that it occurred to me that something was wrong. It didn't surface for me at that time and I haven't made any connection about that before now, but that is definitely a possibility. The unfortunate side effect of that was that I grew breasts, never having had them before. And boy I regret that. Could've had a peri if I didn't mess with my hormones.

Dennis

[Nero]

I was put on a high estrogen birth control to regulate my periods. My breasts got fuller (which lasts to this day) and I became even more emotional a person than usual. It was pretty crazy. I had to stop.
The effects were just too much for me.

[Laura Eva B]

I keep hearing how hormones make so many people feel better, more right in their body and so I wonder if the female hormones could have somehow done the opposite to me--making me feel worse and thus triggering the realization of my gender identity.

I was chatting and drinking with UK's leading endo after a "presentation" (Dr Leighton Seal, works for the NHS gender clinic in London and has seen 2000+ TS).

He is absolutely anti-progesterone (unlike my endo who prescribes it), questioning its benefits in M2F, and says that while estrogen is a "mood lifter" progesterone is a well known "depressant", and why would anyone want to take a depressant ?

So sure Progesterone could have made you feel worse.

But bottom line is you should make gender identity decisions with a clear mind, and not under the influence of any even mildly "mood altering" drug.

Laura x

[lady amarant]

It makes sense to me that the wrong hormones would precipitate a crisis of sorts. Many trans-people only come to a realization of themselves at puberty, for exactly that reason - their mental and physical being starts changing away from androgynous childhood in the opposite direction from what they were expecting, consciously or subconsciously, and it brings the dysphoria front and centre. Late or very gradual puberties, as has been mentioned by more than a few TS people I've spoken to (I experienced it myself as well) would probably not have the same capacity for a crisis-point, since you are remaining androgynous for longer, especially mentally. Being put onto a strong dose of hormones then would be similar to precocious, nasty puberty as some kids experience.

My take on it, could be way off, but there ya go! 

~Simone.

[Ender]

I remember I was put on a course of progesterone, then a course of estrogen + progesterone a month later, when I was around 19.  Reason being was that some 'parts' of me had stopped functioning altogether (ie, no periods); I let it go like that for about six months (and was pretty happy that it had gone) until I did some reading and found that I was most likely damaging my bones by doing nothing.  So I ended up going to a gyno, where she gave me that great prescription combination that I avoided taking for another two months. 

I remember having more of a problem with the estrogen because I recognized it as more of a 'female-type hormone' than progesterone at that time; but it wasn't a pleasant experience taking either of them.  Kind of a subtle thing tugging at my mind that <i>this is wrong.</i>  It was less intense than when puberty hit (which sent me into a several year dissociative depression; I'm still dissociated from this body, btw), but still pronounced.  It took me another two years to pin an exact word on what was wrong; during that two years--and since childhood, really--I was under something of a delusion that I appeared, if not completely male, very masculine to others (with regards to strong upper body, mannerisms, etc).  When that delusion that others saw me as I saw myself was broken--and that this body was not going to conform itself to my mind without medical intervention--is when I finally conceded defeat and decided to do something about it myself.


Posted on: April 26, 2008, 10:52:59 AMOne more thing, to Dennis and Nero: with regards to breast growth, would you recommend NOT taking birth control pills as a method to controlling periods?  I am definitely a candidate for peri-areolar right now, and don't want to do anything to change that. 

I've been to a gyno with regards to painful cramps--seem to be getting worse; OTC pain pills are no longer effective and even a heating pad doesn't bring relief like it used to... the last couple times they lasted about eight hours straight and I was screaming into a pillow for five of those (I have a good tolerance and can ignore most pain, but this is... ridiculous and draining).  Anyways, the gyno recommended I go on birth control.  I voiced my concerns that the breasts would grow larger and she said that it can happen, but she seemed to regard it as a non-issue (almost had a look in her eyes of "why <i>wouldn't</i> you want them to grow?"); it's like she couldn't fathom why it would be a big deal for me.  *Shrug* at this point I'm looking at just putting up with the pain, cutting class if need be, and hoping I don't have an exam that day. 

[Just Mandy]

He is absolutely anti-progesterone (unlike my endo who prescribes it), questioning its benefits in M2F, and says that while estrogen is a "mood lifter" progesterone is a well known "depressant", and why would anyone want to take a depressant ?

I can absolutely  say E is a mood lifter... lol... I've never been happier.  But is that E or the fact I've moving
forward? I don't know.

Amanda

[Case]

He is absolutely anti-progesterone (unlike my endo who prescribes it), questioning its benefits in M2F, and says that while estrogen is a "mood lifter" progesterone is a well known "depressant", and why would anyone want to take a depressant ?

I can absolutely  say E is a mood lifter... lol... I've never been happier.  But is that E or the fact I've moving
forward? I don't know.

Amanda

Hard telling but neither one make it worse!

[lady amarant]

*Shrug* at this point I'm looking at just putting up with the pain, cutting class if need be, and hoping I don't have an exam that day. 

Eryk

*Hugs* 

~Simone.

Posted on: 28 April 2008, 03:21:30

He is absolutely anti-progesterone (unlike my endo who prescribes it), questioning its benefits in M2F, and says that while estrogen is a "mood lifter" progesterone is a well known "depressant", and why would anyone want to take a depressant ?

Natural, bio-identical Progesterone does counter some of the effects of Oestrogen, granted, but it has a number of beneficial effects (as opposed to synthetics, called progestins, such as Provera, which are REALLY nasty)

Benefits:

• Improves cardiovascular health.
• Improves skin, nail and hair health.
• Improves bone-density by targeting progesterone-specific receptors called osteoblasts.
• Somewhat counters the carcinogenic effects of oestrogen.
• Has the same effect as DHT suppressants like Finasteride or Dutasteride.
• Promotes the growth of alveoli (glandular tissue) in the breasts. While actual breast-growth is temporary, the development of these tissues will lead to the growth of a fuller, more naturally shaped breast. Oestrogen only targets fatty and fibrous tissue.

The Downside:

• Excessive levels of progesterone may depress libido and mood.
• May cause slight levels of insulin insensitivity, affecting blood-sugar.
• Again, excessive levels of progesterone may increase the risk of certain types of breast-cancer forming.

All in all, I am definitely pro-progesterone, and will be making sure I get onto it after about a year on OeEstrogen-only HRT.