Mental changes on HRT

[crazyfoxgirl]

I haven't been able to find a lot of information on this topic, so I figured I'd go to the source.

I've been on HRT for a year or so now, but since starting I've noticed some issues with my thoughts. Many transgenders have mentioned emotional or sexual orientation changes, but not many have talked about other mental changes, like changes in focus or interests, or shifts in perspective or preference.

The only way I can think to describe the change I'm dealing with is a loss of focus. Occasionally I feel scatterbrained, like I'm thinking of everything at once. It's probably something similar to attention deficit disorder(ADD). Before HRT I was able to sit and work on a single project for hours at a time, and concentrate much easier, but recently I find myself getting distracted, and can't focus on a single task for very long without also occasionally switching to a different thing, or working on several things at once. It's not debilitating, but it can be a problem if I need to concentrate on something to the exclusion of all else.

However, there could be many reasons for this other than the hormones, so I'm wondering if anyone here noticed a change in their concentration, focus, or thought patterns since starting hormones?

[Sluggy]

I have not had this experience, though I already had ADHD prior to starting HRT.

That being said I'm only two months in

[SophieD]

However, there could be many reasons for this other than the hormones, so I'm wondering if anyone here noticed a change in their concentration, focus, or thought patterns since starting hormones?

I have not experienced any of these effects; I'm almost two years into HRT with oral estradiol and spiro.  I have had some occasional dizziness (my PA explained that spiro can lower blood pressure a bit).  Hope this helps.

[Michelle_P]

Yes, I've had a bit of this effect.

When I was fully in hiding, I found that intense concentration, essentially escaping into a 'flow state' where self-awareness faded in favor of task focus, was a way to escape dysphoria.  I was more comfortable in that state of suppressed consciousness.  I just couldn't sustain it past several hours due to physical needs of my body disrupting the mental 'flow state'.

Perhaps a year to several months before my 'crash' and coming out last year, though, the anxiety and depression interfered with my ability to enter this state, and I couldn't do that any more.  It turns out that the inability to concentrate and focus were symptoms of the depression and anxiety, and were why I lost that knack.

A few months after I started HRT I found that I was able to get back into that 'flow state' and perform well on tasks that required concentration and focus, but at the same time, as I came out to people and eventually started full time life as myself, the dysphoria and the need to escape into myself faded away.

Now, I've lost the knack to entering that 'flow state' due to lack of practice!

I do practice mindful meditation, which involves a 'flow state', but is not particularly good at assisting in focus and concentration on a task.  I've been using that to get through things like Electrolysis Mondays, but it doesn't help when I have to do a tax return, a complex financial calculation, or electronics work.

I doubt very much that I lost the concentration and focus due to return of depression and anxiety, as I felt too darn good.  I think it is just a lack of practice and a lack of necessity, as it is no longer a survival tool for me.

Just some introspection for you to dig through while you poke around for an answer within yourself...

[staciM]

I'm ~2months into an "introductory" dose and over the last couple weeks I've noticed some mental changes.  My wife has caught me several times having some new "ditzy" moments that are certainly attributed to HRT.  She thinks it's funny . Having difficulty pronouncing complex words and forgetting what I'm talking about in the middle of a thought are two common ones.

[warlockmaker]

I remember writing on this forum when I was on HRT for a few months. I had a great therapist and advisor and he used to tell me that the greatest change would be our minds. Not the physical changes that we pre HRT focused on. The change in perception, the significant increase in empathy. Like Zen buddhism says "the trees seem to be no longer trees and the mountains no lomger mountains." This soon changes back to trees and mountains as we understand the new person mentally we have become. I find today that I have better concentration and think much more clearly without the T driving my mind.  E gives us calmness and focus BUT the antiandrogens we take causes many issues and I remember that it made me me feel dizzy, anxious from time to time and short of breath (had a full physical checkup because of this reaction). Many of us have this uncomfortable reaction but we learn to understand. Later, should you choose for srs or orchy we have to watch the hormone balance as menopause females but thats another post

[Doreen]

Well.. I've been (off and on) HRT for around 20 years now.  Keep in mind the mind itself adapts constantly, developing new interests, new hobbies, old things die away, new things are born.  Had a friend say the person you are is different 7 years down the road, and that seems to be holding true.  Enter hormonal changes, and it can be more enhanced?  I am convinced some of it is psycho-somatic though, as many changes allow us to accept ourselves more, and embrace new ideas. 

Whatever causes it, allow your brain and body to adapt instead of fighting it.. but also don't get rid of old interests just because you deem them not 'female' enough or whatever the stereotype is.   Life is about enhancement, so enhance it

[Pisces228]

I have always had social anxiety and agoraphobia.  After starting on hrt they both became debilitating and severe after a life time of only being mild.  I feel like it was because hrt quieted to overbearing, severe, and loud dysphoria and I could actually feel other issues I had.  I am on medication now and I am doing better.  I was also a party animal before transitioning.   Party until 5 am, drink until I fell over at the bar, chain smoke, party drugs.  I was always trying desperately to find something that made me feel happy.  And when I would party and feel good and get drunk and high I wouldn't want it to end.  I was able to get blitzed and not feel dysphoria.  I was *dead name* the party animal.  Quickly after starting hrt, I stopped having the desire to party all the time.  My anxiety got worse, I became more introverted,  but I am happy now.  I'd rather be an anxious introvert and be happier with myself than a party animal who gets trashed to compensate for how bad they feel inside.

[Dani]

Yes, I definitely think differently now. Having been on HRT for over 2 years, I have noticed little drive to achieve things through work. I just sort of let things happen. I am more concerned with how my actions affect someone else's feelings. Sexually, boobs do not interest me much any more and I am beginning to appreciate men with a tight, defined abdominal waist.

[kat69]

I also have found mental changes while on HRT....although much of that is likely due to the decreased anxiety and depression.  I lost my focus and clarity long before HRT, the process of dealing with the anxiety (including medication) brought back the clarity and focus, letting me actually address the core issues which was my gender dysphoria. 

I've found lots of small changes in my interests...I used to cook a lot (as the man of the house), but now I actually enjoy cooking and want to be the one making the meals.  I know it's small....but I noticed it.

I also wanted to point out that in addition to all the other factors including the HRT, you are also getting older...sorry to bring it up, it's a reality though.   The funny thing is that if it weren't for me getting just a slight bit too old for my mind to handle the anxiety....I wouldn't be the Kat I am now.   My body was breaking down under the stress.   So perhaps you need to talk to your GP simply about aging.

[Jacqueline]

Hi crazyfoxgirl ,

Welcome to the site.

Yeah, I have been on for a little over a year and experience some of that. When I need to focus I can. I just don't like getting to that spot as much as I used to. At the same time, I swear my multi-tasking ability has improved. Maybe I'm just nuts.

I can also just be happy. Not about something but just generally happy with a sense of clarity. That was not the case before.

I also want to share some links with you. They are mostly welcome information and the rules that govern the site. If you have not had a chance to look through them, please take a moment:

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

Once again, welcome to Susan's. Look around, ask questions and join in.

With warmth,

Joanna

[Katya]

testosterone is a neuro-inhibitor ... so when you take it away your brain may kinda go into overdrive, but with a bit of meditation or just breathing and calming yourself ... there is a marvelous clarity to be found here and this is the aspect I have found most rewarding thus far

[Saskia_F]

I can fully relate to that!

Interests that I used to have before, have vanished partially or even completely. Not being able to concentrate myself like before, scattered thoughts, being focused on the decline too, all that has indeed happend.

I've been being on HRT for about 3 months.