Growing up confused

[Shana A]

Growing up confused

By Shelley Widhalm
May 5, 2008

http://washingtontimes.com/article/20080505/CULTURE/962847694/1015

Left out of the debate over gay marriage and gay parenting is the potential devastation wrought on the child, said Dawn Stefanowicz, who tells her story of growing up with a gay father and a chronically ill and passive mother in her memoir, "Out From Under: The Impact of Homosexual Parenting."

"I wanted those in authority to realize how their decisions impact families and children," said Mrs. Stefanowicz, speaker, media spokeswoman and home educator living in London, Ontario.

Mrs. Stefanowicz advocates for families and children on the issues of marriage, parenting, sexuality and education, and is a resource for family policy, legislative, medical, research and scholastic organizations. Her Web site, www.dawnstefanowicz .com, serves people who have grown up with a homosexual, bisexual or transsexual parent or parents and provides a network for sharing their stories.

[tekla]

The Washington Times is a daily broadsheet newspaper published in Washington, D.C., the capital of the United States. It was founded in 1982 by Unification Church founder Sun Myung Moon, Bo Hi Pak, one of his main assistants, and other church members  wiki

take it with a grain, or pillar, or salt.

[NicholeW.]

Understanding the Moon & Family Research Council agendas is one caveat to be aware of in this item.

There are at least two others. 1) That all homosexuals are like she saw her father. That's a huge reach, but given the perspectives of the publishers, the reviewers/newsperson and the Research Council, I am sure its a reach that they don't find particularly difficult to make. For them, and her, her life is a paradigm that covers the range, simply because they cannot imagine their opponents, in this case, homosexuals, acting in any way diverse from one another.

2) That the only two choices involved in raising children are a single household composed of mother, father, children. Or a 'gay' household composed of a mother, father and children. (in other words a re-capitulation of her own family or the one next-door that she always wanted to be a member of.)

They tend to over-look the other possibilities, of which I am sure there are more than this: 2 fathers, committed & loving of one another and the children; 2 mothers same as the last, children raised by grandparents, foster-care families, a state agency, heterosexual families that look and act exactly like her own did except that the 'problem' there isn't homosexuality, it's work, or play or hobby or social circles or some other thing that helps the parents over-look the needs of their children to the exclusive benefit of the parents. Probably find those, a lot, in the churches these folks attend.

Any parent worth their salt has to understand that focussing everything on the children is no more good than focussing nothing on the children. There's balance. That way the children get a 'feel' for life after family where not much of anyone will be much concerned with even balancing their needs.

You'd think a group that 'researches' families could discover that anyhow.

N~

   

[tekla]

Any parent worth their salt has to understand that focussing everything on the children is no more good than focussing nothing on the children.

Perhaps worse.  One of the things that kids from the large old-school Catholic families always seemed to know was that life was about more than them.  They were never going to get their way all the time.  And at other times, in order to get what you wanted it took some form of cooperation.

For my part I tried real hard not to handicap my kids by giving them an easy life.  Though they were not thrilled with that at the time I think they came to a grudging understanding of it.