Now, that’s different…

[Natasha]

Now, that's different...

Link
7/1/2008

"Just a few weeks ago when I was presenting as fully male all the time, my old automatic behaviors were busy doing their job of running the show and not much of 'me' was involved. In that state of being there was either very little body dysphoria or more likely I was repressing it, just like I repressed everything for decades. But once I started to allow myself to be more feminine or otherwise let the real me "out", I could actually feel a dysphoria with my body. By that I don't mean emotions, or visceral dislike of this body part or that. It was more like noise, or a signal mismatch between my brain and body. Like my brain and body had to yell to each other to be heard clearly."