'Ello!

[cyanidelullaby]

Hey everyone, as far as transitioning is concerned, you may call me Natalie. I received a terrible wake-up call in the form of a transitioned MtF posting pictures of herself post-op and describing what transsexuality is on the SomethingAwful.com forums.

Two years have passed and I haven't done anything substantial to help myself. There are issues I had to deal with from high school itself so I worked at those to keep myself sane. Once I felt ready to find a therapist, I did so, three sessions with her made me incredibly depressed due to the thing she said to me. That I would have to have plastic surgery for my face and chest in order to pass.

I tried talking her about how I felt about that, stating I would really like to see how hormones affected my appearance before considering plastic surgery. She didn't really listen to me so I stopped the therapy and here I am now. In limbo. Found more therapists, but I am not sure anymore. Maybe I should just die.

Sometimes it's hard for me to keep going. My family has showed support although it's funny because they have(when angry) mocked me about it. So, that too is tearing me apart inside and I am not sure what to do anymore.

Besides all that, I'm a huge fan of MMO games, reading books, and watching movies, anything that'll get me away from the way I feel now. =) Nice to meet everyone, I hope to make new friends here.

[NicholeW.]

Welcome to Susan's, cyanidelullaby

What an interesting name!

Please take some time to read The Site Rules and on The Main Page you can discover Links, Chat and Wiki for your use as well.

It's great to have you here!

Nichole

[Chrissty]

Hi Natalie

Welcome to Susans: hopefully you will soon find that reading and participating in this forum will help you find the new freinds you seek.

I'm more than a little surprised that any therapist was recommending surgery within 3 visits. I think you did the right thing dumping her!

You sound more than a little frustrated...So a quick word of advice about this forum..

...You need to make a total of 15 posts (replies or topics) before you can get to a lot of the interactive facilites..
               .. We Newbies all seem to miss this at first, and it can be really annoying..So do take a moment to read the rules as Nichole suggests...

I look forward to hearing more from you in the weeks to come.

..Oh and did I mention that this was a truly International site, with participants from all over the world ?..

...so it's also welcome from London in the UK...

Kisses

Chrissty 

[cyanidelullaby]

Thanks to the both of you for the welcome. I like the name cyanidelullaby, been using it since junior high on and off for forum accounts.

And yeah, the IRC channel I lurk on most of the time said to ditch the therapist too. Sorta made me nervous with therapists again, but it was something I had to do.

I did notice that this website has members from all over the world, it's very cool. Sorta used to it from other online communities but it never gets old to have different cultural perspectives in conversation!

[Nero]

Welcome and let me just say that Natalie is my favorite name in the world.  Excellent choice. 

[Chrissty]

Oooh, I've been called a lot of things, but this a first for "cultural".

It sounds like you are a little happier today.....so lets hope you can build on that.

You will still need to see doctors and therapists again to deal with your issues,
but please do not try going it alone, as it is both dangerous and expensive.

As I'm in the UK I can't help much with this one, so I suggest you try asking for help
in getting some recommendations for therapist in your local area by posting a topic in
the Transgender Section..

...Also keep looking on the web for local support groups in your area.. they do exist, and
can save you a lot of time and frustration with regards to the "red tape", as well as
giving you personal contact with some like minded freinds.

Go for it Girl!

Kisses 

Chrissty

[cyanidelullaby]

I really don't like support groups though. ;_; And thanks! I've thought of the name for two years and haven't thought of a different one yet.

[tinkerbell]

A belated welcome to Susan's, Cyanidelullaby!

Thanks so much for introducing yourself.  Please take a few moments to get familiar with all the boards of the site, review the site rules before posting (I am sure you already have  ), and take advantage of our many resources such as the wiki, chat, and the links listed at the main page.  We look forward to your future posts and participation.  Enjoy your stay

tink