Quote from: Joseph on July 19, 2008, 11:53:01 PMQuote from: Elwood on July 19, 2008, 10:57:40 PMTrans people are not freaks. Just like gay people aren't freaks. A lot of people just don't get it. I'd rather be happy and a freak anyway than lie to myself any everyone else for the rest of my life.
Hey Elwood. Thanks for your reply. I totally agree that trans people are not freaks. However, it seems most of the world doesn't agree with me and I don't really feel like going on a crusade to change their minds about this issue.
This is how I look at it; the majority of the people in the world are bigots, idiots, liars, cheaters, con artists and ->-bleeped-<-s. So you know what I say to them? Nothing. I ignore that massive chunk of the population. Who needs 'em? There are civilized cisgendered people I talk to, but there are a lot of rednecks here in Sonoma. I have to deal with a lot of bigotry and nonsense from a great deal of people, but somehow I manage to let that roll off my back like a duck in water. It used to bother me, but my own personal self confidence became more important to me than they're unsupported criticism.
Quote from: Joseph on July 19, 2008, 11:53:01 PMThis is going off-topic, but I may as well explain why I'm probably not going to transition. As annoying and paralyzing as gender dysphoria can be at times, I also find that there are other issues that often transcend my dysphoria. In addition to us, there are people out there struggling with poverty, broken families, other medical issues like autism, etc... and if you believe there's a God, there's the issue of what's going to happen after you die (eternity is a long time) and how to get to where you want to go. Of course, I'm not saying that you can't deal with those things and also transition, but I'm not sure the time, effort, and money spent on transition is worth it to me in light of those things, especially if I'm considered a freak as a result. I want to help people who are hurting and in need of encouragement. I want to share my views on God with people who have genuine questions. I can already do those things. Transitioning will mean a significant amount of time and resources spent away from those things, in addition to cutting ties with people and being a total emotional drain to my family. I already have guy friends who meet my needs for guy bonding (some know who I really am), I fit in well where I am despite my gender issues, I have a loving family, and I've made peace with the prospect of being single for the rest of my life (many people are lifetime singles anyway, even if they don't struggle with gender issues). Transitioning to cure my annoyances about being female doesn't seem to be worth it right now. I suppose I should also mention that I believe in a life-after-death, in a heaven where gender dysphoria won't be an issue any longer. Compared to eternity, this life is pretty short.
Well, first, I don't believe in God or a life after death. So I can't help you there. Some people would say that transition is a sin. But because I think eternity would be Hell in itself and I would go mad, I would much rather live a good life while I can. I live under the assumption that my life is simply the perception of my brain, and that when my brain dies, time and existence stops for me. There isn't a Heavenly parade or Pearly Gates waiting for me. It will just stop. Just like Tony Soprano, it'll be lights out for me.
I don't think money is relevant to God, whether or not there is a God. See, the point of life is to survive. People claim that life is about caring for others, but if each person carried their own weight, the world would be stable. We've got a lot of lazy asses in this world that we feel like we have to take care of. Taking care of ourselves isn't hard, and there should be left over strength for helping the disabled people. But poor people? Most poor people are poor because they aren't doing something right.
Who considers you a freak after transition? You do. No one here is telling you you're going to be a freak. Why do you listen to what other people tell you? They also called black people freaks before they knew what being black was. You think society's got a damn clue what they're talking about? I don't know about you, but I wouldn't trust them for nothin'. They're full of crap. They talk simply to let hot air out of their heads.
If your God is more important to you than your personal happiness, more power to you. But I have a strong belief that no one is in the position to help others until they've helped themselves. A person must be in their best shape before they can expect to help other people get into shape.
But what Janet has said before is right. If you aren't willing to lose
everything, don't transition.
Quote from: Joseph on July 19, 2008, 11:53:01 PMQuote from: Elwood on July 19, 2008, 10:57:40 PMI've come to accept the fact that I'll never be a 100% normal male. I've got to try to be happy with what I can have.
Exactly, though I recognize that my situation is probably different from other people here on these forums. To those reading this, I respect whatever decision you have made (to transition or not transition).
All the best,
Joseph
I appreciate that respect, Joseph. Thank you, and I respect your decision as well. Do what is best for you.
Posted on: July 20, 2008, 10:02:16 AM
Quote from: GQjoey on July 20, 2008, 05:25:06 AMI can't tell you how much anxiety I get when I go to see a new doctor, and get a physical etc, but the more you do it, the more you become comfortable with YOU. I just recently, at the age of 25 have been more open to people around me about being Trans. And I have lived "legally" as a male sine the age of 16. It took me almost 10 years to come to terms with the fact I will NEVER be a bio male, but that makes me no different, than any other male on this planet. You need to reach deep down bro, and realize even the most "normal" human being, is far from. We all have a story, don't be ashamed of yours.
I've gotten over it. My doctor knows that I'm trans, and she respects it. She completely understands. The best way to have an easy physical is to work with a doctor that works with you and respects you. Don't like the doctor you have? Get another one. No one makes you pay a doctor you don't like. That's what's great about this portion of the medical field. GPs are really flexible.
