Depressed and angered.

[caleybug]

Where to begin.....


Has anyone ever had one person who just totally makes your life a living hell? That one person who constantly goes out of his/her way to make you suffer no matter who else he hurts? Sadly, I have one of these people in my life, and the worst part is I am related to him.

This person has been a constant thorn in my side since I was a kid, and now he is trying to have my ssi taken away, by telling ssi that I am not really disabled. He informed another relative of his plans to do so. He has always believed that I've been given money by people in the family, and he is so jealous of the fact I am still living at home, and not out on my own. I guess he thinks I am getting all of this money (which I'm not) off the people I live with, and he feels he deserves it more than I do.

I've been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, general and social anxiety disorder, depression, and gender identity disorder, and I know me being paranoid isn't helping me, but I am worried that he will actually succeed in having my ssi/medicaid taken away before I am able to work again. He also threatens to "prove" that I am getting extra money from people. (which isn't true)

I know I have my shrink and medical doctor to back me up on how I am suffering from these issues, but I don't want to have to go through court or whatever the process is to prove I am still having these issues.

I am just not sure what to think at all. I've thought about contacting a lawyer and going after this person for slander and harassment, but I don't want to be the "bad guy who keeps things going within the family" I don't want to cause troubles within the family, I just want to live my life as close to normal as one can under my conditions. =\

-sigh-









Posted on: July 14, 2008, 02:04:25 AMJust an update....


Well, the person I mentioned previously reported me to S.S. today (found out from another relative). So now, I play the waiting game to see if I have to prove that I am disabled again. I swear, I try not to hate anyone, however this person has proven to me that all he wants is to make my life hell on earth.

If things couldn't get any worse, I found out exactly how another relative thought about me today. He said he didn't want some transgendered person making any decisions for the family (long story on the decision he was talking about), and that I am just dressing up for attention (that makes 2 relatives who have said this).

Then my mom just had to throw in her issues on top of mine. It's not my fault that she has a big mouth, and doesn't know when to stop. I haven't been suicidal in awhile, but I was at the point of a nervous breakdown, and the thought of ending it all did cross my mind.

I am so confused and don't know what to do right now. I am scared at the thought of losing the only income I have, I am scared because of the suicidal thoughts I had earlier, and I am just mentally drained after today, I have no desire to do anything but lay here in bed and wait for the world to stop turning.

I really do want to believe life will get better, but I am so overwhelmed right now, I am not sure what to do. I am seriously considering checking myself into a hospital. =\

I am sorry to go on and on, I just need somewhere to let it all out, before it consumes me. =\

[Jamie-o]

Hey, let it all out.  No apologies needed. I'm sorry your relative is being such a jerk.  It sounds as if you're dealing with a poisonous family situation.  I'm sorry I can't offer you much practical information, since most of what you have talked about is beyond my experience.

I can say, if you find yourself feeling suicidal again, please, please contact your therapist, or call a suicide prevention line where you can talk to people trained in helping you work through the moment.  I know it's hard to see it when you're standing in the muck, but things will get better.

Meanwhile, having a plan in place to deal with the practical issues can help make everything less overwhelming.  Do you have legal services available to you where you live?  They may be able to give you advice on dealing with the hornet's nest your relative may have stirred up.  It might even be worth contacting S.S. to find out what the procedure is for investigating reports of Social Security Fraud.  Forewarned is forearmed, as they say. Good luck! 

Keep your chin up.  Here's a big virtual hug, just to keep you going for a while.  In fact, take as many as you need.

[rockthe40oz]

I have someone in my life a lot like that. A crazy, ex heroin junkie ex boyfriend. He still insists on poking into my life and making me miserable from time to time. It's gotta be hard to have a relative doing that kind of stuff though.

I feel for you.