FTMI Yahoo group--anyone on it?

[Arch]

I'm just wondering how long it usually takes to become a member of that group. I was a bit slow in verifying my backup e-mail address, but other than that, I think I've done what I needed to do.

It's been just over a week. Am I being impatient? Myabe tomorrow I'll send a follow-up to the moderator and see what's up. I'm not sure why my membership is still pending.

I guess I can't complain too much, though. It was taking such a long time that I went looking for another forum, and that's how I found you guys.

[Dennis]

I've found some of the yahoo groups to be really slow to respond. I haven't tried the FTMI one yet, but there were a few that seemed so dormant that the moderators didn't pay any attention to them any more.

I like this place better anyway

Dennis

[Sarah Louise]

I am co-owner of a room for married ts at Yahoo.  I know I try to look daily at messages from those wanting to join, but once in a while I am not able and it will sit for a day or two.

I am not familiar with the group you mention, but if they have not answered within two weeks your request is automatically deleted by Yahoo and you would need to reapply.

Sometimes an email explaining why you want to join will help.


Sarah L.

[Arch]

Well, I just sent another e-mail to the moderator over there. It could be that I missed a step. It's been just over a week since I applied, and I'm not sure whether that's a long time for a group like that. I'm not exactly a paragon of Yahoo groups experience. Sarah Louise, I went through some of the Yahoo FAQs and didn't see anything about that two-week rule. That's good to know for the future. My membership is listed as "pending," though. I wonder if I would still be deleted after two weeks?

Dennis, the FTM_I group is quite active and has been around for quite some time. I noticed a few others that had no recent activity, and so I passed them by. One was a regional group that didn't look very active. Too bad, because it would be nice to share info with locals about the services and support in my area.

But I can't help thinking that once I've found one online forum (namely, Susan's Place), I am very much less likely to post on the other one. Still, I'd like to be a member because there should be lots of knowledgeable people there. It's a pretty large group and exclusively FTM. Exclusive isn't necessarily better, though.

I've only been on Susan's Place for a day, but I already love it, too.

[Hal]

Yeah,

I had the same problem when I tried to sign up, but I thought it was an infosite about trans stuff not a forum. I'm very satisfied with Susan's.org though! Great site, quick responses!

Hal

[Arch]

Hal, I had subscribed to the FTMI newsletter for years, so I specifically went looking for their Yahoo group, which I had found listed on the FTMI site. I don't really understand the nature of the group. It's listed as a discussion group. I do know that you can connect with people there.

So, did you never get into that group? What happened?

I put off applying for an entire week--just as I put off calling the GLBT center about counseling--because I pretty much knew that if I pursued any of this, I was probably throwing my entire summer away and wouldn't be making any progress at all on my dissertation.

The summer is far from over, but so far I'm right. My diss is lying idle, and I can't afford to let it...but I can't seem to help myself. It's ridiculous. At this rate, I will have to seriously consider taking the fall off from work, that is if I'm offered any work. I'm such a slacker.

I know, I know--don't indulge in negative thinking. Well, sometimes I can't help it.

[Elwood]

I think I am... Lol. No, maybe I'm not yet. I'm not sure. I'm part of BABOYZ (it's a group for FtMs in a SanFran bay area) and FtM Sonoma (I live in Sonoma county). I'm still not sure if I joined the general FtM group. They seemed quite militant there and I felt a little threatened by that...

[Hal]

Nothing happened, 'cause I never got to join. I typed in the info for the membership and it said it would e-mail me the confirmation or whatever... still waiting... maybe it got lost in cyberspace...     
Hal

Posted on: July 30, 2008, 02:08:45 PMAbout the Ftm newsletter, is it free? What's the site address? Hal

[Arch]

Nothing happened, 'cause I never got to join. I typed in the info for the membership and it said it would e-mail me the confirmation or whatever... still waiting... maybe it got lost in cyberspace...     
Hal

Posted on: July 30, 2008, 02:08:45 PMAbout the Ftm newsletter, is it free? What's the site address? Hal

Hunh. Maybe I won't get in, either. They're definitely careful about whom they let in. I don't know, you could try reapplying. Did you go through all of the steps? First I got one of those automated replies, which stated that I had to write to the moderator and explain a few things about myself. I did, and I received a nice reply from the moderator, who is also the president of FTMI. And then I received an e-mail at my backup e-mail address--I was supposed to verify the backup address. My introductory membership e-mail hadn't said anything about this verification process, and I don't check the backup e-mail all that often; so I missed the window and had to have the verification resent. But I did that three days ago. I reread the introductory e-mail to make sure I had done everything, and it seems as if I have. So I don't know what the holdup is.

Hal, FTMI membership is not free, but the organization has always had a policy of not turning anyone away because of financial hardship. Regular membership is $60 a year (it used to be much cheaper), but subsidized membership is $12 a year.

Let's see if I can make the hyperlink function work here. (Link removed)

I tried to rejoin recently through their PayPal link, and it didn't work. I found a different link that seemed okay. Not everything on the site works as it should. Now that I have this forum (SP) and am pursuing counseling, I might wait a bit before getting back into FTMI.

At least, I'm TRYING to pursue counseling. Where is that dratted list of specialists that the GLBT center was supposed to e-mail me? I'm getting awfully frustrated.

Posted on: July 30, 2008, 03:09:01 PMSorry about that link. I completely forgot about the policy. I usually have a great memory...

Posted on: July 31, 2008, 04:47:29 AMBoy, I've gotta tell y'all, I've just about had it with the FTM_I group. Maybe I'm too impatient, but what is the delay? I've made the application, verified my backup e-mail, and sent three e-mails to the moderator. Do they circle the wagons whenever someone new comes along? Are they doing a credit check? Are they waiting for my firstborn male child? (That's not gonna happen, LOL.)

Come to think of it, if they are checking me out, they won't find any info on the name I gave them. It's a pseudonym, for my own protection. I should think that a check like that would be counterproductive anyway because so many TG/TS people have two names: one legal, one not. So I don't think it's that.

If they're just slow, that's a bad sign, too. Not enough manpower or not enough delegation. Or both. Either way, I'm quickly losing interest in this group. Susan's Place is MUCH more welcoming.

[Hal]

At least, I'm TRYING to pursue counseling. Where is that dratted list of specialists that the GLBT center was supposed to e-mail me? I'm getting awfully frustrated.

have you tried looking in the the transitional male resource book for therapists in your area?

Hal

[Arch]

I finally got into the FTM_I group, and it really is just a mailing list. I read a bunch of back messages without finding too much useful material, but that doesn't mean it won't be useful in the future. I suppose I should be glad that the group is so picky about whom they let in.

At least, I'm TRYING to pursue counseling. Where is that dratted list of specialists that the GLBT center was supposed to e-mail me? I'm getting awfully frustrated.

have you tried looking in the the transitional male resource book for therapists in your area?

Hal

Hal, I consulted a number of resources, including Transitional Male, before I called the LGBT center. The woman I talked to there seemed to have a more comprehensive list than anyone else. So I wanted to wait. In the end, I went with the guy that she mentioned as specializing in FTM issues.

My main problem--and this might seem ironic--is that I can't be counseled by a female therapist. I get along with women fine in daily life, but therapy requires me to really open up, and I won't do that with a woman. It probably goes back to my own mother, who had mental health issues that she never did anything about. It's a long and complicated story, but I've never really connected with her, and I didn't trust her as far as I could throw her. (Not that I would dare. Scary person, my mother.)

So...you can imagine that wanting only male therapists rather limits my choices, so I wanted the info from the center before I made a decision. However, it looks like things will work out anyway.

TM is a cool resource. I still haven't plumbed all of its depths.