Getting a Job

[Aiden]

Ok, so I have a part time job currently, is my first job and it's a very relaxed environment.  Basically long as not dressed with holes in cloths showing everything your fine.  I'm out there, and they don't seem to mind.  I often just wear my usual every day cloths as well.  I like the acceptance there, and I know what I have there is rare, but there is one small problem...

I'm graduating soon, and moving out hopefully within next 6 months.  Soon as move out the amount of income I get will drop by quite a bit.  My hope was to be able take the time I had to be at school and put it toward work.  Not sure if they will have openings for them days though.  Plus I know I need to work something within my field of study.

So what's my issue?

One: Most the jobs in my field require full time, and I'm not ready to work both a full and part time job.  Not to mention the time it takes to get from one place to another will make it rediculas.  And I don;t want to quit my current one yet, not till am sure can keep the new one.

Two: I don't know if I should come out to the people hiring me or not.  I mean if it's a good job I may end up being there through early stages of transition.  Plus the idea of having to put on a girl appearence bothers me.

Three:  I don't have a single business suit and I don't know if I should come dressed masculine or feminine.  Only nice cloths I have are from my feminine phase and their not exactly formal wear.  So I don't know what to wear, and 4 goes with this...  I have no idea where to get something good for an interview, much less a place thats affordable.

So I dono, any suggestions?

[Lee]

IMHO, I do not think it is a good idea to disclose this to a potential or new and sometimes even an employer that you have been with for awhile.

Others may disagree, I just think this is one of those things that is for "need to know" people.

Particularly when you are trying to get a job, most of the time the interviewer(s) may be friendly and seem to be positive about anything you volunteer, however I would just focus on selling your skills, talent, etc. in regards to what you have to offer them and the company as an employee. Work hard on Selling yourself!

What industry are you going for a job in?

Some industries, like mine, pressed khakis or slacks and a nice polo do just fine even if you have to present as female, or are read as one.

Good luck to you!

[ConfusedMichelle]

I have a possible job interview on Sunday at a restaurant called Red Robin.  Anyone heard of it?

It's an All-American, really trendy Burger/Milkshake joint that's spreading all across the south.  Apparently you'll walk away with at least $100 in tips every night, according to current employees.  The uniform is just a red Red Robin t-shirt and jeans.  So I think I will be able to pass well enough there.

[Dante]

Heard of Red Robin, but there aren't any in my area.

As for your job, Aiden, I'm not sure. I've never had a job before, so I can't offer much. But I agree that you shouldn't tell them just yet that you are a transsexual. You should probably wait until you are employed, that way they can't fire you because of it. And you'll have an idea of who you will be working with, to see if you trust them As for what to wear, I say go to a suit store (like Men's Warehouse) and find yourself a suit. Find something that is masculine, but not too much so. Something androgynous, but leaning toward male. That should be good for your interview/work.

[sneakersjay]

Depending on the dress code of the place of employment, you may not have to dress girly.  In my job I can wear scrubs or casual as long as it's not jeans.  I usually wear khakis or cargo pants, and a button down shirt (casual, plaid, short sleeved) with a belt and black sneakers.  I'm not out, but I'm not girly either.  Plus my hair is very short, as is the hair of a few women coworkers.  So I look fairly androgynous at work, though I do have to suffer the female pronouns.

As T takes effect, I'm growing my hair long again.  I'll be the guy with the graying ponytail, but I love that look on men, so why not me?  My stylist is aghast!!  LOL

Jay

Posted on: August 14, 2008, 11:04:17 AMAiden, as far as interview wear, it totally depends on the field you're going into.  Try to ask others who have gone before you what the dress code is for interviews.  It may not be suit/tie formal, but business casual, where dress khakis and a button down shirt may be all you need.  Kohls and even Target has those for not much money.  Heck, Kohls has suits even.  See if you can find out before you spend money on something you really don't need. 

Jay

[tekla]

Dude, a cheep suit is just that, a cheep suit.  They don't fit right.  So at a bare minimum go to someplace like Men's Warehouse or Macy's and get a half-way decent one at a place that has an in-house tailor who can make the adjustments in it.

Second.  Go to the place you are interviewing at the day before.  Hang out across the street at lunch time and see what everyone who works there is wearing.  Walk in wearing the same stuff, look like you already work there.


Always take the full time job over the part time one.  If you have doubts, don't even try for the full time, because most real full time jobs (one that pay over minimum wage) are in reality, more than full time.

[Aiden]

Well I'm graduating with an associates in Multimedia, with my stronger skills being in the 2d computer arts such as photoediting, 2d images, and flash.

I did talk to the career services person at my school.  Basically she just said that a black suit, plain will work.  Doesn;t have to be feminin or masculin and black is a fairly good neutral color.  Now just gotta see what I can afford lol.  And find a place nearby can get to.

As for the coming out part... I understand what your getting at, but I don't see my status being hidden.  Up point, Pittsburgh from what read does have antidiscrimination laws for Gender Identity, but still doesn't mean it couldn't effect the job process.   

[tekla]

I'd go for more of a charcoal gray, black looks too much like an art student or funeral director, not that there is much of a difference, but gray looks more like business.

[Aiden]

mmm... I guess... not sure what you meant about that comment about art students and funeral directors.  I do consider myself a form of art student you know wasn;t aware I was anything like a funeral director

[tekla]

Go with the charcoal gray, looks more businesslike.

[Aiden]

Will have to look and see what can get, and what looks good on me lol.   Won't be able get anything till next month though.

[tekla]

Well go check out a men's warehouse or macy's level store, I'm sure a good suit is running at $400-600.

[Aiden]

400-600!!!  crap.  I don't have that much      not after bills and food

dang... not even before bills and food realy  would take everything had left after rent

[tekla]

Hey, people who think its cheaper to dress as a guy are right in that you need less clothing, but good clothes are expensive regardless of gender.  And, $4-600 is not expensive for a suit, not even close.  An Armani suit is going to run $1-2,000.  Heck an Armani tie is $130. 

A custom made suit is going to be $2-3K and up.  But they do wear well, and look great.  I got one years ago in London, when the exchange rate was very high in my favor and it still cost $1K.  Worth it though.  People do notice that kind of stuff.

Also, you need shoes.  Nothing give people away like shoes.  Allen-Edmonds are the way to go, about $300.

At some point, if you really want to make money, you have to look like you have it and are worth it.

[Dennis]

Yeah, I usually pay in the $4-600 range for a suit. You can find cheaper, but they'll look like crap after a few times wearing them and they will look cheap right away. Cheap suits don't hang right and they wrinkle fast.

Ties I can get away with $25-50 on sale, but usually don't buy anything other than fairly heavy silk cause other materials pill, get misshapen, and generally look shabby too fast. A tie chain or tasteful clip can dress it up too.

And Tekla's right about shoes, but I haven't followed that advice. Too much wear on 'em for me to pay $300, but I know my shoes detract from the whole look. And women notice that sort of thing, because I do have one pair of expensive shoes that I don't wear to work and I get comments on them every time I wear them (in the sort of 'oh! you do have decent shoes, don't wear those other ones' way).

Dennis

[Aiden]

Sighs... then it's going be a while before I can get one.   I may have to go with something cheep least temperaily.  I understand what you mean, but you can't spend money you don't have. 

[tekla]

Well, the difference between good shoes and crap ones is that good ones can be resoled and re-heeled.  So, while you might go through five pairs of crap ones, I'm still on the first pair of the real good ones. 

And, at that, we are not symmetrical  beings.  One foot is a bit bigger than the other is on my body.  So, with average shoes, one is either too tight, or too loose.  (or vice-versa).  But my EA shoes are each perfect for each foot.  Which is way comfortable.

Same with suits.  I have one arm about 1/8 to 1 /4 inch longer than the other.  Most OTR suits look wrong.  But the suit I had made for me took that into account and when you look at it, each sleeve looks right.

And, in the long run, that stuff is no more expensive than the cheep stuff.  One pair of those shoes last like three or four pairs of any other shoes.  Same end out.

[Aiden]

jeeze...  what you expect me to do?  avoid looking for a job till I can save enough money for a suit?   I don;t see what is wrong with getting something on the cheep side until can aford a better suit. 

BTW did an online search... kinda annoying that hard to find something gender neutral all say for men or for women

[Scotty72]

If you can't afford a nice suit don't sweat it.  But if you do manage to find some dude's wallet and return it to him and he gives you a thousand bucks, take Tekla's advice and get a nice suit.

You could manage to scrape by with a nice pressed pair of black khakis and a nice longsleeved button down shirt with a tie.  If you're a good shopper you can find good fitting pants for 10-20 bucks, the shirt from 5-10, and the tie for 5 or 10ish, depending on material.  Shoes arn't hard to find either if you're looking right.  Walmart always has an older mens section with nice black shoes that look dressy but will only run you 20 bucks.  And it doesn't have to all be black either, but I'd stick with the black pants and shoes, they just look more professional.  But you could toss in some color like a red or dark blue shirt with a solid color tie.

It'll look nice without the bite in the wallet.  If you're a fairly decent shopper all that will run you anywhere from 50 - 100 bucks.  It tends to look pretty nice without looking overzealous.

[Aiden]

Yeh, got someone where I live who's going to try and help me find something lol.  Not sure how the tie would work.  I tend to be a little to obviously female in front