Alternatives to SRS/GRS?

[Sarra]

Well, this may be moot, but until I know for sure, I must inquire.

I have been thinking about surgery. I realize that surgery is... Well, 10 years away for me, if I chose SRS or GRS. Well, 10 years away at best. Instead, I've considered a nullification instead. For those of you unfarmiliar with nullification, it's basically where they remove all male genitals and leave a flat area, with a hole for the urethra.

This would prevent any future SRS, other than the procedure using part of the colon. Since sexuality and I seem to be mutually exclusive, that is more insentive to get a nullification than not to.

Has anyone else considered this path, gone down it? Pros, cons?

I get pain in my testes, usually once a month for about 2 weeks, sometimes 3. The pain is accompanied by them shrinking, or growing. It isn't the same kind of pain that comes from a torsion. I have talked to 2 doctors about this so far, and neither could find anything wrong with me. When they shrink, they're almost half the size of how they normally are. When they 'grow', they get to be about normal size for male genitals. Not taking any meds right now that would effect this, no HRT, or anything. Just... Getting frustereated with the pain.

[Terri-Gene]

I was giving some thought to a "nullification" a couple of years ago, as I wasn't thinking in terms of sex ever again in any terms and since Libia Plasty can be done, the finished product can look like it should, just leave nothing for penitration.  I asked a Lesbian woman about just how important the lack of a vagina would be, assuming no problems of a personal nature about intimate relatons with a transsexual?

She told me that while it was not necessarily necessary to have a vagina, in many woman to woman relationships, it could be important and shouldn't be discounted as a heavy factor.

I still give it some thought now and again.  Makes no difference one way or another if I keep my wife, but I'd really hate to limit my choice of partners if it did turn out to be a big deal.  It's always a low budget option though if you just can't carry it around any longer.

Terri

[stephanie_craxford]

Hello Sara,

I read about nulification a while back and it's still in the back of my mind as an option for me as well.  Sexual relations has not been an issue for me for many years now so I do consider it as viable.  I'm asuming that it would be somewhat cheaper as well.  Another option I was also thinking of was partial GRS, where a vagina would not be created, the name of this proceedure escapes me at the moment.

The thing that must be considered is the results of both proceedures.  If I were to choose either, I myself want to be very sure that this is the route to go as once there I believe it would be almost irriversable.  As Terri-Gene mentioned, you have to consider future relationships, or the effect on present relationships.

Then to top that off, there is the whole debate on if you were nullified would you be a woman?

[4years]

Bah.
My private parts have no baring on weather or not I am a woman thank you very much.

[stephanie_craxford]

Bah.
My private parts have no baring on weather or not I am a woman thank you very much.

I have to agree somewhat, but unfortunately for me here in Canada anyway, legally the only proof govenment will accept to change the "Male" to "Female" marker on any of my documents (drivers license etc...) is a form from surgeons stating that that I have had GRS and I am now a woman.

But no matter what, like you I know that I'm a woman, and thing will change that. 

[4years]

Ah all right I was not considering society's thoughts on the subject. You make a very valid point Stephanie

[Terri-Gene]

 "My private parts have no baring on weather or not I am a woman thank you very much"

May not to an individual, but there sure is one helck of a doings going on because all to many people, not to mention a good portion of them are women who would argue that point.  It's hard to talk about being a women or be included in anything concerning womens space from the middle of a group of these.  Mifght not change your mind about what you are, but it sure makes it hard to take any pleasure from it.  Fortunately, the situation is being addressed.  Now, if it does any good ...... ??

Terri

[4years]

"... but it sure makes it hard to take any pleasure from it."
Not from where I sit. Now granted I do have a lot less social interaction than most people (by design), but regardless it really does not matter much to me what someone else considers me as. Perhaps this thought will change as time goes on, though I tend not to think so. I'm not doing this to be accepted by others. I'm doing this to be accepted by myself. (Just to reiterate I am speaking for just myself.) I believe this differentiates from the thought of doing this to be accepted as yourself. The end result I believe is the same, we all seek to be ourselves and be happy. But, our definition of happiness and acceptance differs. At least, I think so

[Terri-Gene]

 "The end result I believe is the same, we all seek to be ourselves and be happy. But, our definition of happiness and acceptance differs."

Somewhat, but for me, it is two different issues.  I can be happier, more useful, productive and a lot more secure in myself with my body image straightened out, thats the primary objective, after all, to be comfortable with what I am and not at odds with my inside and out.

Underneith it all though, is wanting to just be left alone with it.  To not be pointed out as "different" or questioned about what it is I feel?  Though I could care less what the boys think about it, I do care about the acceptance of females as a true part.  I can belong in my mind forever, but that does not make me happy in any real way.  I want the recognition and nurture of those I identify with.  I need that, If acceptance is not granted because I don't cut it, then thats that, but if the only reason is because I'm "different" it's like being crushed, 3rd class, while I'm barely handling 2nd class just yet while never taking a back seat.

And then too, I'm heavily bought into the binary system, so it's 100% or it'll never feel right.  OK, so 100% is asking more then is possible in relaionships with others, but I'm far from being an island,  I need to be shared with and loved with, I need people, female people, Women, who can go past facts and figures and just see the ideal, with the reality to realize that the ideal is subject to imperfection.  I've sealed out so many things and avoided or neglected  meaningful relationships in the past, just so I could concentrate on myself and not worry about them.  I need others in my life, those I can share with, learn with, experience with and grow with.  And these arn't common everyday people you find wherever you look.

I got no idea how to put a description to it, but down deep, I need that simple recognition from those I would be a part of to be complete, so no, Self Acceptance is a primary goal, but once it is achieved, it demands recogniton of others to fulfill itself.

I said before about only having it here and there.  It's all in the circles.  All know I was born male, I've been to public for it to be otherwise and when it gets brought up I feel empty, because i'm right back where I started, different, and not in a way I would want.  What others think can be very real to you 4years, it can make all the difference in being there as a true participantor, or, a spectator.  To me, simply knowing it just isn't enough, it is the acknowledgement of it by those who matter that makes it all come together.

Terri

[Cassandra]

I'll give you my take on the subject. I don't really care if I am accepted under any legal definitions. And acceptance by others is not the end all or be all. I've never really been accepted fully as either so I'm used to it.

My general feeling is that I was cheated at birth so I want to be as close to 100% as is medically possible. Not for anyone elses perceptions or the possibility of future relations, just for me. I don't really care how cheap other methods might be it just wouldn't be the same.
I want the best surgeon I can find and if that cost more, fine. If I just can't afford it I'll just wait until I can.

Just my 2 cents.


Cassie

[Terri-Gene]

I can hear where you are coming from Cassandra, but there comes a point when just yourself isn't all you need.  Humans are social animals and some of us have greater or less social needs.

I to could never really be happy except as 100% anatomically correct, but aside from my own need in this there is the ability to not have to exclude myself from any situations which might result in exposure.

I learned all to early on what almost total non acceptance can be, much as most do I guess, but needing love and closeness as I always did, it had some rather drastic effects on me and a need for acceptance has always driven me.  that drive is a hugh drain of energy and thught, and the simplist means of eliminating it is to find it and know that I don't have to work so hard to achieve it.

As to the "alternative methods", well, there are many who can stand carrying it around no longer, but are short of the funds with waiting not likely to produce any more available cash, and in those cases, a cost of 1/4 to 1/2 of full SRS can be attractive, as it can be outwardly just as convincing.  As long as there are no "toys" or men involved.  And sensation can be retained just as in full SRS.

Terri

[4years]

Acceptance by others is very good don't get me wrong. Above I classified that as "accepted as yourself". It might well be we all first wish to be accepted by ourselves and then later accepted as ourselves. This is speculation though.

But more to the point of the topic at hand, weather one can accept (the "accepted by yourself" part) less than full blown GRS or not will depend on the individual.

... As long as there are no "toys" or men involved. ...

Depends on the toys but that is a deviant topic

[Leigh]

I couldn't imagine not getting SRS, but then again I am greatly looking forward to heterosexual sex as a woman... though I can definitely imagine it being an option for lesbian transexual-types.

For lesbian-transexual types?  I can't speak for het-transexual types, but penetration in the lesbain community hapens all the time.  Why would anyone not want the whole package?

[Cassandra]

Why would anyone not want the whole package?

Good question. I just don't see why anyone would cross the finish line and then refuse the prize. And dittos on the lesbian thing. What were you thinking Devi, just cause we don't want a man we don't use our 2000 parts?

Cassie