Why am I still dealing with this!

[Angel_Mapper]

I had SRS last month, and the only piece of paperwork I have left to change is my birth certificate, so I should have been done with all these transition shenanigans, except...

Nobody on my mom's side of the family knows, because they all live in the south and I don't keep in touch with them.  I would be happy to keep it that way, but my sister's pregnant, and due in December.  My grandmother is going to be visiting my mom and sister for Christmas and for the birth.  I'm not going to miss the birth of my first nephew, but I'm not looking forward to my grandmother's reaction.  I couldn't even guess whether it would be a good or bad one.  I don't want to wait until I get there and have a potentially huge fight stress my sister out, but ffs, I had SRS, I'm done having "the phone call" with people and there's no way in hell I'm going to disguise myself as a guy like I had to do at my sister's wedding two years ago.

BLARGH.

[Janet_Girl]

Angel,

I have but one word for you about dressing as a boy to please them..........Don't.  Ok its a contraction, but you know what I mean. 

You have been through everything, including SRS.  You are you now, be only you.

Janet

[Flan Princess]

How about a good fashioned conspiracy  >
Where everybody who knows about your (post) transition is quiet and only refers to you as a "friend" of your sister.
(or am I just thinking out of my rear end again)

[Angel_Mapper]

Angel,

I have but one word for you about dressing as a boy to please them..........Don't.  Ok its a contraction, but you know what I mean. 

You have been through everything, including SRS.  You are you now, be only you.

Janet

Oh god, no way.  I'd rather uh... something unpleasant rather than do that.

Maybe acting like it's always been like this and being confused when she asks why I'm a girl now will work... 

[cindybc]

Hi Flan Princess, your statement

(or am I just thinking out of my rear end again)

was certainly good for a few giggles. Sometimes I wonder that myself.

Hi Angel_Mapper, you are even legally a female now and why on earth would you want to present as anything else your not, just to please a few hostile wing nuts in your family? What you may want to do though is discus it with your sister and it she is willing to accept you as who you are then she should be the news breaker to the rest of the family. Announcing that her sister is coming to town for the birth of your nephew. If things get hostile, just don't go, you really don't need or deserve all the hurting.

Cindy 

[Angel_Mapper]

My mom and sister are fully supportive of me (they live in Reno, not down south with the rest of our extended family), but they've said and I agree that it's not their place to tell the family.  This would be so much easier if I KNEW they were going to be hostile, but I don't know.

I'm just going to show up to see my sister and mom.  If my grandmother doesn't freak out then awesome, but if she does then that's her problem, I shouldn't make it mine because it's not.

[cindybc]

Ok that sounds good, if your mom and sister support or accept you and they are the main reason for going, I would say that is good. It is wonderful to be able to have family that accept you, and seeing your nephew being born would make it so worth going, not to mention bringing closer ties between you and your sister. It is so unfortunate that  so few in our families do accept us. If getting past the cranky grandma is the worst of it, then you will be fine.

I will also send prayers that all goes well

Cindy

[Liann]

Frankly, I wish I had your situation and your problems. I'm green with envy.

[cindybc]

Hi  Liann, Sighhhhhhhhh, I do so agree with you.
I haven't seen my sister in 8 years since I came out full time as Cindy. We were close growing up as kids and continued to be close into our more mature years until I told her about Cindy. Unfortunately that ended our relationship and that was 8 years ago. My children left for college a year later and haven't seen them since. I had 11 children go under my roof through the years. My own three children, my sisters 4 children, a foster daughter and three children I had in my care up till five years ago. Now they are gone. Even after having dealt with this before transitioning it still at times comes back to do a number on the emotions, I loved children and I should thank the Creator for having been blessed with having as many children under my roof. My sister is not getting younger so the chances of seeing her again grow slimmer. Time does not heal all in such cases. Anyway, that will be enough from this old windbag.

Sorry for this teary eyed post folks, it's just not been my best day today.

Cindy