It is personal for my grandmother

[Secretgirl]

Once she saw about a writing with my new name. She became overly anxious and said (or cryed): No this. Anything else. This is not new for me. Please!)
I do not know what to think or what she meant.

[Renate]

Hi SecretGirl:

I think that she's just having a hard time coming to terms with your transition.
Maybe she'll eventually get used to the idea, maybe not.
Sometimes older people are very fixed in their ideas, but sometimes they are open to new things, too.

Just be patient and show her that you still love her.