SAGE ADVICE: Ugly woman in a beautiful dress
http://www.swvatoday.com/comments/sage_advice_ugly_woman_in_a_beautiful_dress/living/3660/10/1/2008
The girl who sat behind me in 10th grade history once told me I'd make
a pretty girl. That was before my hair left my head and scattered to
my chest and back. I was thin then and hadn't yet went through the
whole pimple thing. A few accidents had scarred up my face, but it was
still smooth for the most part. Even razor nicks weren't much visible
since I only had to shave about once a month, give or take a month.
If only Tricia could have seen me Saturday.
I don't, in fact, make a pretty girl, good-looking woman or hot mama.
I do look a lot like an ugly Janet Reno in search of her Elian
Gonzalez.
That ugly Janet Reno thing is no oxymoron. Trust me.
I found out exactly how terribly ugly a woman I make in the moments
before a womanless beauty pageant in the Bland gym. I hadn't taken any
of the wigs or clothes for a test run, so I was fairly shocked when I
looked in the mirror. I think I gasped, which made me feel pretty
unmasculine, decidedly less masculine than Janet Reno, particularly
when Mrs. Reno has her gun trained on little Cuban boys.
