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Grrrrrr.....very annoyed.........

Started by findingreason, October 26, 2008, 08:04:07 PM

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findingreason

I was thinking about something, everyone I came out to about possibly being TS are not being very considerate of me lately. Each and everyone of them is still using male titles like guy, boy, dude, etc......completely unnecessary in my opinion. I wish they would just use gender neutral ways of talking around me, instead of enforcing me as a male even more. I don't know for sure if I am female, but when I hear all this male stuff it doesn't help me figuring myself out. I don't mind he/him/his because it is necessary in sentence structure, but they can leave the rest out.

I used to be hurt each time they called me by one of these things, and was more than upset at their lack of respect for what I am going through, but anymore I've heard it so much I just don't care anymore.

Any suggestions on what I can do to perhaps get them to stop? They are supportive of me, but I want to remind them to please not use these identifications of me when they talk around me.


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Annwyn

grab an arm and rub ur boobs against it.  that gets the message across:)
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Sephirah

If they know you don't like it... just pretend you don't hear them or act as though they're talking to someone else. That should get the message across eventually. *hugs*
Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

If you're dealing with self esteem issues, maybe click here. There may be something you find useful. :)
Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3
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pennyjane

i agree with laura.  i was persistant and firm.  i never held back from letting people know that it hurt me when they used the male pronoun.  very few people ever did it to hurt me, so when the ones who did it unintentionally learned that it hurt, they tried harder to not use it.

i was never mean, or even annoyed...i just corrected it when i heard it.  it took awhile, but i haven't had the male pronoun used on me for a long time now.  one thing i learned very early on....thin skin and transsexualism are not a very good match.  God bless with...
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Janet_Girl

The one thing that has worked for me when ever someone slips in that male pronoun in my presents.  I turn and say "EXCUSE ME.  Him/he?" and if they use the male name "Ah. It's Janet".  And yes some will get the impression that I am a B***h about it.  But it works because they always say they are sorry and correct what they were saying.

Sometime you have to lay down the law to people.  And then stand your ground.
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findingreason

Thank you for all the replies everybody,

I don't know if I have the courage to stand up for myself yet, as I don't know about myself for sure yet....though hopefully I'll have a better idea of it soon. But I guess I have to take a stand to at least get them all to neutral gender speech with me, as I need to give myself some headroom to figure out what I am without all those male pronouns and such.


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Gracie Faise

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Nero

Quote from: Gracie FAISE on October 26, 2008, 10:50:30 PM
"Dude" is gender neutral, btw.


yep, so is 'guy' (you guys).even 'man' is sometimes used on females from their friends (c'mon, man). I've been called all these as a genetic female. 'Boy' is really the only one mentioned never used on girls.

But even so, if you don't like it, you don't like it. And they should respect your wishes.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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