Finding a woman after/before transition?

[Mister]

That's your call.

Do you think you could be without her and be happy w/o transitioning?  Or are you willing to hold off on something you want/need for your (potential) partner?

[darius82501]

I'm just hoping she comes back. She said she really wants it to work with this guy but would seriously consider being with me if it doesn't workout. I can't transition where I am at now. Not a good place to do it at, if there is such a place.

[Mister]

Well, Geography aside..   If you're willing to not transition to be with someone, I'd recommend you look at your motivation for being with that person.  Staying "female" because of someone else's preference sounds much more like you'd be living the life she wants you to live than the one I assume you'd prefer to.

[Elwood]

I've always hated the idea of "FINDING" a woman and "SEARCHING" for a partner. I never shake hands with a new friend INTENDING to have a "relationship" with them. I always look for friends, and friendships may or may not become more. I find it manipulative and immature to say, "Yeah, I'm single and looking." It's never going to be genuine if you're SEARCHING for that person. It will always be staged, and you were in it for the "girlfriend/boyfriend" relationship. The friendship stage is skipped, and this is why there are countless divorces and break ups...

[icontact]

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Listennn. The perfect answer to your question.

[darius82501]

Listennn. The perfect answer to your question.

That is a good song. I'm just being realistic. There are a lot of people who end up alone. And if she doesn't decide to come back, there is a good chance that could be me. Finding someone who can deal with transgender is difficult. Thanks for the song though.

[Janet_Girl]

I know that this is you boys thread, But what is wrong with a Trans woman,HUUUUMMMM.

Ok she is leaving now. ** Door slams shut **

[Nero]

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Listennn. The perfect answer to your question.

Love that song. And I did find them for a time but now they're in the ground.

[Elwood]

I know that this is you boys thread, But what is wrong with a Trans woman,HUUUUMMMM.

Ok she is leaving now. ** Door slams shut **

Transwomen are fine, as long as she doesn't use her penis on me. And I know that sounds horrfying, but I know a transgirl who loves to have sex with her penis.

I had a crush on someone who I thought was a transgirl... but he was a cross dresser who identifies as male.

[Janet_Girl]

That Dan, is something that will never be a problem.  That part of my anatomy is verboten.  It is a growth that is better not seen. 

Once it is removed and the faster the better, the happier I will be.  I am looking for love and affection, and not sex. 

Sorry for jumping into you boys' talk.

[iFindMeHere]

I've always hated the idea of "FINDING" a woman and "SEARCHING" for a partner. I never shake hands with a new friend INTENDING to have a "relationship" with them. I always look for friends, and friendships may or may not become more. I find it manipulative and immature to say, "Yeah, I'm single and looking." It's never going to be genuine if you're SEARCHING for that person. It will always be staged, and you were in it for the "girlfriend/boyfriend" relationship. The friendship stage is skipped, and this is why there are countless divorces and break ups...

HOW OFTEN do I agree with Elwood?

OK.

He's right.

I disagree strongly with the sexual practices in this book (no sex til marriage? AW HELL NO), but "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" is a pretty good book otherwise.

Posted on: November 08, 2008, 05:53:08 pm

I know that this is you boys thread, But what is wrong with a Trans woman,HUUUUMMMM.

Ok she is leaving now. ** Door slams shut **

Yeah I think that would be awesome if I dated women. Because she might understand at least the trans issues. But socially, women kinda tweak me. Maybe I'll get over that as I get more used to living as the man i am. *shrugs*

[sneakersjay]

That Dan, is something that will never be a problem.  That part of my anatomy is verboten.  It is a growth that is better not seen. 

Once it is removed and the faster the better, the happier I will be.  I am looking for love and affection, and not sex. 

Sorry for jumping into you boys' talk.

No problem, Janet.  I have no problems dating a transwoman, with or without that part of her anatomy, whether she likes tolerates it or hates it, whether she isn't opposed to using it or would rather not use it.  A transwoman is a woman, period.  Just as I have a tiny dick, I accept that a transwoman may have a larger clit. 

Doesn't matter, because I will fall for someone because of who they are as a person, not because of what is or isn't in their panties.  But she would have to like sex -- however we would define that--...cuz I can't live without physical intimacy in a relationship (BTDT with a depressed ex with no sex drive.  Not good!)

Jay

[Janet_Girl]

There are more ways of being physical intimate, than sex.  Kissing, cuttling, back rubs, holding each other.  I know I can show a man that I love and care for him, without the sex.

Don't get me wrong, sex is great.  But I am not ready  intercourse until it is complete, at least not until we had a discussion about it and that calls for being out with them.  But if that person was FtM and knew that I am Mtf, then it would be 'OK, how are we going to do this" kind of discussion.

[iFindMeHere]

Doesn't matter, because I will fall for someone because of who they are as a person, not because of what is or isn't in their panties.  But she would have to like sex -- however we would define that--...cuz I can't live without physical intimacy in a relationship (BTDT with a depressed ex with no sex drive.  Not good!)

Jay

YES THIS. I don't care what we do (as long as we both like it) but comfort with and interest in sexual matters with a partner is a MUUUST.

[Mister]

Doesn't matter, because I will fall for someone because of who they are as a person, not because of what is or isn't in their panties.  But she would have to like sex -- however we would define that--...cuz I can't live without physical intimacy in a relationship (BTDT with a depressed ex with no sex drive.  Not good!)

Jay

YES THIS. I don't care what we do (as long as we both like it) but comfort with and interest in sexual matters with a partner is a MUUUST.

Sexual compatibility, yes, but I think I'd be too bothered by needing to 'ignore' things to sleep with a pre-op MTF.

[iFindMeHere]

YES THIS. I don't care what we do (as long as we both like it) but comfort with and interest in sexual matters with a partner is a MUUUST.

Sexual compatibility, yes, but I think I'd be too bothered by needing to 'ignore' things to sleep with a pre-op MTF.

It's interesting the way different people think of things. I don't know that it's a hard-and-fast rule for every single affirmed woman. I know it isn't for affirmed men--I have a friend who is a very out transman and loves his genitalia as is.

[Mister]

YES THIS. I don't care what we do (as long as we both like it) but comfort with and interest in sexual matters with a partner is a MUUUST.

Sexual compatibility, yes, but I think I'd be too bothered by needing to 'ignore' things to sleep with a pre-op MTF.

It's interesting the way different people think of things. I don't know that it's a hard-and-fast rule for every single affirmed woman. I know it isn't for affirmed men--I have a friend who is a very out transman and loves his genitalia as is.

Eh, i guess that was an incomplete statement.  I fully enjoy sex.  I fully enjoy sex with someone with female anatomy.  I have no sexual attraction to male genitalia in the slightest.  There is no way I could sleep with someone female appearing without the equipment to match.

[iFindMeHere]

Eh, i guess that was an incomplete statement.  I fully enjoy sex.  I fully enjoy sex with someone with female anatomy.  I have no sexual attraction to male genitalia in the slightest.  There is no way I could sleep with someone female appearing without the equipment to match.

See now that seems unfair.

[Mister]

Eh, i guess that was an incomplete statement.  I fully enjoy sex.  I fully enjoy sex with someone with female anatomy.  I have no sexual attraction to male genitalia in the slightest.  There is no way I could sleep with someone female appearing without the equipment to match.

See now that seems unfair.

Explain thy opinion, sir.

[iFindMeHere]

Eh, i guess that was an incomplete statement.  I fully enjoy sex.  I fully enjoy sex with someone with female anatomy.  I have no sexual attraction to male genitalia in the slightest.  There is no way I could sleep with someone female appearing without the equipment to match.

See now that seems unfair.

Explain thy opinion, sir.

It's not a personal accusation, I hope you understand. I am considering the opinion not you personally.

I would hate it if someone said "I'm not gonna date him cos he doesn't have a penis." Seems.. unfair somehow.