three typically male traits you will never give up.

[Ellieka]

Some times telling some one "Go F*** yourself" gets the desired reaction but I find it just as amusing to tell them to "Go do something with yourself that the Bible would not approve of." Perhaps a bit more wordy but it still gets a satisfying perplexed look from the target.

I'm not opposed to the use of "cuss words" but I hate hearing them used ten times in a five word sentence.

[tekla]

I don't know, the first time I ever heard a complete sentence made up of nothing but the F word, as in F-ing F-er's F-ed, I have to admit I was almost impressed.

[iminadaze]

perhaps this is generational... i know there is a time and place for certain language, but im not as stuck on this being horrific!

Makes sense from a younger generational perspective, but if/when you have children of your own
who like to use profanity like its going out of style, and society looks at you as being at fault when
it is society who is at fault, then tell me your opinion, I have a feeling it might be a little different.

Expulsion from school, the child sits in thier room too much cuz parents don't want thier kids
around the child cuz of thier potty mouth and when you go to approach the child to try to
help the situation the child simply tells you to leave them the F*** alone...It can be horrific!

But what do I know, I am just a parent who sees this happen all to often.

Nicole

[tekla]

Aside from the cultural stuff - which is never forced, no one on my stage is forced to refer to ever single item with the F word in front of it, but I'm sure not going to stop anyone from doing it.

But with kids the thrill of the forbidden is hard to resist. To the degree that you make a big deal of it, they figure out that its a big deal. 

[Rachael]

Makes sense from a younger generational perspective, but if/when you have children of your own
who like to use profanity like its going out of style, and society looks at you as being at fault when
it is society who is at fault, then tell me your opinion, I have a feeling it might be a little different.

Expulsion from school, the child sits in thier room too much cuz parents don't want thier kids
around the child cuz of thier potty mouth and when you go to approach the child to try to
help the situation the child simply tells you to leave them the F*** alone...It can be horrific!

But what do I know, I am just a parent who sees this happen all to often.

Nicole

The language is not the problem there, its the kids dicipline, and how they were brought up. Children dont have to be bad, but they can get that way when they get that message from home, or are allowed to get that message from elsewhere and that its ok.... swearing is the syptom, not the disease

[iminadaze]

But with kids the thrill of the forbidden is hard to resist. To the degree that you make a big deal of it, they figure out that its a big deal.

Sure do hope so, my daughter has me pulling my hair out, and I already don't have enough if it.

  Nicole

[Rachael]

wow... you got this forum on bleeper?

Tbh, if you give her a good role model, and treat her right, she will get over it. She needs to realise being that way is bad.... ignore her more when she does it, when she messes up, punish her. and dont let her forget that will happen. most of all, show her love.

[iminadaze]

The language is not the problem there, its the kids dicipline, and how they were brought up.

Way wrong IMO, and I pointed that out. Society's point of view

So what do you you suggest...beat the child to enstow discipline.

I'll admit I am at my wits end but I will never resort to that.

  Nicole

[tekla]

Look, there are 40-50K words in the English language and your sorting out a mere handful as being 'bad' because a bunch of bible jerks have somehow got it in their knickers that they are naughty words.  Intercourse them. 

I don't even use them (much) because I find that instead of asking "What's your F problem?"  I get a better response out of using my creative side and asking "What's wrong kid, you find out that when Daddy played with your sister she got a safe word and you didn't?"  Or, "Did your mommy catch you helping mister assistant minister make white tinkle after Sunday School again?" 

Note that lack of dirty words.  Note also, its much worse.

My kids grew up talking like that because my wife did, though being the educated type she really liked the eleven letter words more than the four letter ones, but they went to college, got good grades and it didn't ruin their life. 

[iminadaze]

wow... you got this forum on bleeper?

I don't know what that means, perhaps its a way of saying leave it alone,
and maybe that would be best...I don't want people to dislike me
even though it is just me being diverse. anyway I enjoyed the discussion
and am going to try ignoring the situation with my daughter, but without
ignoring her of course, perhaps it may make a difference.

And Tekla, Noted... Yeah that is much worse.

Nicole

[tekla]

I also taught a lot of my crew some ASL (American Sign Language) gestures so that when they had to be quite they still could swear at each other.

[iminadaze]

She has learned those too...some anyway, I see it out the corner of my eye.

[tekla]

To the degree that people are offended by it, the kids will pick up on that, it gives them something that most kids rarely have, power.  To the degree that you don't care, they get bored with it.

[placeholdername]

Sure do hope so, my daughter has me pulling my hair out, and I already don't have enough if it.

  Nicole

Speaking as someone who was incredibly defiant towards my parents when I was younger (to the point where I dropped out of high school and they send me off to a therapeutic boarding school), the problem with your daughter has nothing to do with curse words being bad or good, and little to do with how she was 'brought up'

What it is is that she has feelings she needs to talk about, and she either doesn't know how to express them, or doesn't feel safe expressing them.  If you can find a way for her to be able to open up to someone (parent/friend/therapist/anyone) you will be far better off than if you try to focus on correcting her behavior.  The behavior is never the problem, it's just a symptom.

Now I've said this but I don't really know anything about you or your daughter and I could be way off the mark, but I spent years in that therapeutic boarding school and a lot of it rubbed off on me.  No matter what, it will take time before things get better.

[iminadaze]

Speaking as someone who was incredibly defiant towards my parents when I was younger (to the point where I dropped out of high school and they send me off to a therapeutic boarding school), the problem with your daughter has nothing to do with curse words being bad or good, and little to do with how she was 'brought up'

What it is is that she has feelings she needs to talk about, and she either doesn't know how to express them, or doesn't feel safe expressing them.  If you can find a way for her to be able to open up to someone (parent/friend/therapist/anyone) you will be far better off than if you try to focus on correcting her behavior.  The behavior is never the problem, it's just a symptom.

Now I've said this but I don't really know anything about you or your daughter and I could be way off the mark, but I spent years in that therapeutic boarding school and a lot of it rubbed off on me.  No matter what, it will take time before things get better.

You nailed it pretty good, to the point where I do have her in counseling.
Of course thier discussions are none of my business...

[placeholdername]

You nailed it pretty good, to the point where I do have her in counseling.
Of course thier discussions are none of my business...

That sounds good.  It's something I'm still dealing with my parents about.

[Rachael]

I don't know what that means, perhaps its a way of saying leave it alone,
and maybe that would be best...I don't want people to dislike me
even though it is just me being diverse. anyway I enjoyed the discussion
and am going to try ignoring the situation with my daughter, but without
ignoring her of course, perhaps it may make a difference.

And Tekla, Noted... Yeah that is much worse.

Nicole

I meant you replied fast

[Alyssa M.]

Here's some advice for you young people, from your mother.

[joannatsf]

So, I'm a parent and my kid is off to college now but I remember having "the talk" about language.  I said that there are no such things as bad words.  There are only innappropriate people and situations to use some words.  The trick is to figure out what will fly in any given situation.  If your grandma asks how you are "->-bleeped-<-in' great" is probably not a good answer!

I also said that swear words have power.  They are meant to convey strong emotions.  Using them in common speech destroys their power.  So use them when you've got the right audience and situation or if you REALLY want to convey strong emotion. 

[Alyssa M.]

Curse words losing there power is annoying, but the abuse of the word "literally" is my pet peeve.

"When you use the word 'literally' to mean 'figuratively,' I 'literally' want to shoot you. Capisce?" 

I know a guy who was a Classics major in college who twitches every time he hears the word "tragic" to describe a natural disaster.