The Lion (of God), the (Sea) Witch, and the Wardrobe (that you can't have)

[Alyssa M.]

Actually, this story has nothing to do with C. S. Lewis whatsoever.

Last week I went to a holiday party with a bunch of musicians -- singers, actually. And, well, you know what happens when singers get together, don't you? No? Well ... um... they sing.

And I don't mean just a couple of their favorite Top 40 Hits from when they were in junior high -- no, they sing everything from Christmas songs to German Lieder to Broadway to ... well, Disney. So I'm already feeling rather dysphoric -- all those beautiful soprano voices that I can't dream of ever even approaching...

And then someone starts playing a soft lilting eigth note motive on the piano -- fa-sol-la-do-fa-sol-la-do, sol-la-ti-re-sol-la-ti-re, repeat -- yes, that sounds vaguely familiar...

     Look at this stuff, isn't it neat?

Oh, Little Mermaid? Yes -- I don't even know how many times I saw that -- must have been a dozen or so -- one of the benefits of having sisters, one of my true guilty pleasures growing up. Okay, I'll sing along softly if I can remember some of the words...

     wouldn't you think I the girl who has everything?

Still trying to remember how this song goes...

      but who cares,
     no big deal,
     I want more.

     I wanna be where the people are.
     I wanna see, wanna see them dancing,
     walking around on those -- what do you call 'em -- oh, feet!

Oh, crap, suddenly this sounds ... too familiar ... I'm starting to replace words in my head, edit the lyrics on the fly ...

     wish I could be
     Part of that world

... the sopranos sing, as I sit on the stairs watching them relive the childhood I never had.

And I suddenly realize why I always loved that ridiculous movie. All these women grew up seeing that movie (at least in retrospect) as a mildly female-affirming, mildly misogynistic fantasy ... hey, sweetie, think life's so tough as a girl? You want to be a mermaid? Well, she wants to be you, so be grateful! (But selling the message with sparles! and happy Disney music!)

     What would I give if I could live out of these waters?
     What would I pay to spend a day warm on the sand?
     Bet'cha on land they understand
     That they don't reprimand their daughters
     Proper women sick of swimmin'
     Ready to stand

Yes, I always knew what was really going on in that movie -- especially once I figured out that Ariel is really a boy's name: an Archangel, Lion of God, a character from The Tempest.

Just one day -- give up my voice? In a heartbeat -- I never wanted it in the first place. Pay? Yeah, I've thought about that one pretty well -- what, $50-100K? But don't you even think about it, kid. You try, and you'll get fed to the Sea Witch. "Where they don't reprimand" -- don't you mean "sons," son? And proper women? fuhgeddaboudit!

And so I'm sitting there on the stairs next to the piano, fighting back tears, actually, discretely wiping tears from my eyes, thinking, "how the hell does a guy explain bursting into tears over the Little Mermaid?"

Listen to it again and tell me I'm making this up.



~Alyssa

[lady amarant]

You're not making it up. I always loved that movie, and yeah, it touched me right at my core.

~Simone.

[Lisbeth]

I grew up too much on the original story to feel much from the movie. The seawitch giving her a dagger to kill the prince who had married another, but instead flinging it into the sea expecting to become seafoam, but rather becoming a spirit of the air to kiss the cheeks of the newlyweds? *shudder* No, no, no, no....

[LondonBridge]

I absolutely loved that movie, the original story and practically anything to do with mermaids and still do haha! I heard in a documentary once that most trans children seem to be fascinated by mermaids!

x

[MarySue]

No, you're not making it up. Music can trigger primal emotions. Although I suspect it wasn't just the lyrics. You said you'd seen the movie with your sisters; the music might have brought back a lot of stuff from your childhood. On top of that, you were at holiday party. I don't know your status, but for a single person, holidays in general, and parties in particular, can be upsetting.

This was the first time I'd heard Arial's song. It hit me, but not as much as it affected you.

BTW, the song that gets to me is Aldonza's Song from Man Of La Mancha. The first time I heard it was on the b'way cast album. It left me shaking like a leaf. I just sampled a few YouTube renditions. None of them have the power of the Joan Diener version I heard in college, but I still wanted to crawl into a corner and hide under a blanket.



Here are the lyrics. It's best delivered "against the words" -- as if Aldonza is a queen who's angrily proclaiming her noble birth to some fool who's mistaken her for a mere commoner:


I was spawned in a ditch
By a mother who left me there
Naked and cold and too hungry to cry
I never blamed her
I'm sure she left hoping
That I'd have the good sense to die.

Then, of course, there's my father
I'm told that young ladies
Can point to their fathers with maidenly pride
Mine was some regiment
Here for an hour
I can't even tell you which side.

So of course, I became, as befitted my delicate birth
The most casual bride, of the murdering scum of the earth.

Spoken -- Don Quixote: But still thou art my lady.

Aldonza: A LADY! How should I be a lady?

For a lady has modest and maidenly airs
And a virtue I somehow suspect that I lack
It's hard to remember those maidenly airs
In a stable, laid flat on your back.

Won't you look at me, LOOK at me
God, won't you look at me
Look at the kitchen slut, reeking of sweat
Born on a dungheap, to die on a dungheap
A strumpet men use and forget.

If you feel that you see me not quite at my virginal best
Cross my palm with a coin and I'll willingly show you the rest!

(spoken -- Don Quixote): Never deny that thou art Dulcinea!

Aldonza:
Take the clouds from your eyes and see me as I really am.

You have shown me the sky, but what good is the sky
To a creature who'll never do better than crawl?
Of all the cruel devils who badgered and battered me,
You are the cruelest of all.

Can't you see what your gentle insanities do to me
Rob me of anger and give me despair
Blows and abuse I can take and give back again
Tenderness I cannot bear.

So don't reach out to me when your sweet Dulcinea you call
I'm no-one, I'm NOTHING, I'm only Aldonza, the whore!

[Lisbeth]

This is the modern Disney song that gets to me:



*cries* (literally)

[iFindMeHere]

This is the modern Disney song that gets to me:



*cries* (literally)

Me too--i didn't know why it made me cry for the longest time. Obvy I apply it in the other direction from you but really read the lyrics: http://fpx.de/fp/Disney/Lyrics/Mulan.html#Reflection

it could be interpreted either way.

[lady amarant]

This is the modern Disney song that gets to me:

...

*cries* (literally)

Oh my goodness. I haven't seen Mulan yet. This song has me in tears now. Is there a strong trans-thread in the whole movie, or is it just this particular song?

~Simone.

[iFindMeHere]

Oh my goodness. I haven't seen Mulan yet. This song has me in tears now. Is there a strong trans-thread in the whole movie, or is it just this particular song?

~Simone.

It's not trans at all. It's part of a traditional set of stories about Mulan, who is a cultural Heroine. Heteroromantic, Wartime, etc etc.

oh and Eddie Murphy

[MarySue]

I don't think those movies have a TG theme per se. But they do have a general transformational theme. They feature a princess who seems to have it all, but yet she's dissatisfied with her life. She wants to be ... something else.

That's what makes the story appealing. As they say, watching a story about a happy, well adjusted person is about as exciting as watching paint dry.

Is it any wonder that the general theme of "wanting to be something else" strikes a chord ... if not the whole bloody orchestra! ... in most of us?

[iFindMeHere]

*nods*

[Lisbeth]

Oh my goodness. I haven't seen Mulan yet. This song has me in tears now. Is there a strong trans-thread in the whole movie, or is it just this particular song?

~Simone.

Well, Mulan runs away from home and joins the army as a man in order to fight the Huns. There's also this scene where she gets the men in her squad to dress as girls to sneak into the palace and rescue the emporer. Though the movie is more about gender roles than gender identity.

There's a much longer version of the song on the DVD in the extras section. I wish I could have found that video.

Mulan II is a horrid letdown because in it Disney upholds the traditional values of family, obligation, and hetero-relationships.

[krisalyx]

AWW same thing here loved the litle mermaid i mean i literly bugged my parents to death with the soundtrack, but what get to me is rent strangly enough just most of the songs toward the end including the "i should have died 15 years ago" song just make me cry like crazy, also did anyone actually try to watch ken burns the civil war i mean everytime i ever head ashkogan farewell i would just cry & sob like crazy to the point where i could not either watch the documentry or listen to the soundtrack without crying. does anyone else has anything that would make you just break down like that.