Identity Politics

[lisagurl]

Does being a women give us a license to be emotional, irrational and irresponsible?

If traditional expectations of stereotypes is acceptable why should women be considered equal? If indeed women can not live up to or expect to be afforded exceptions for their actions why should they be given equal rights as rights come with responsibilities?

[TamTam]

We are equally as emotional, irrational, and irresponsible as men are, just perhaps in slightly different ways and different methods of expression.

[lisagurl]

just perhaps in slightly different ways and different methods of expression.

Like selling our bodies?

[whatsername]

What is this thread about?

[TamTam]

Re: selling bodies.  It saddens me when people are so judgmental.  How is it our business what people choose to do?  We don't have to agree, but perhaps your arguments are what's irrational and emotional, not the women you're so eager to look down upon.

[cindybc]

I work at a women's shelter where up to 300 women who work and/or live on the street come each day for meals, clothes, and other necessities, so I know for a fact they don't do it for pleasure. It's called survival.

If you sit with any one of of these ladies you will soon discover that not one of them is  there for lack of intelligence. They think, feel, see, and perceive the environment around them just as well and clearly, if not then more keenly aware than most well-to-do, pampered individuals.

The comment that custody of children is not so much in favor of the woman any more is correct. At one time it was that way but now the courts look for who is better suited to take care of the children. 

Both men and women have varied emotions, feelings, and perceptions of events and circumstances in what is transpiring the world around them but from experience I have noticed that perceptions between a man and a woman on any given situation differ.  For example, looking at a color scheme they would differ in the shades of colors they see largely depending on the viewer's sensitivities. The intensities could be deeper and more defined, like the saying feelings can go "soul deep." Nurture and intuition.

As a woman, which would you feel could be further into the depth of shades of colors?

Cindy     

[cindybc]

Well I had three nieces and on nephew I helped raise from changing diapers to high school age, my three children, The only dealing I had with court was when my ex left and took the three children with her.

In later years I had them again in my care when they were in their teens. I also had one foster daughter and later, 6 years ago to be exact,  the last three I had under my roof was one girl and two boys, with consent of the mother and the approval of children's aid.

By then I was working as a social worker at the time and there was occasion when I crossed paths with children's aid during work routine. I had already transitioned to full time when I had the last three children in my care.

I do agree the courts were much more in favor of the mother back then. I was under the impression that this had much since changed.

Cindy     

[cindybc]

Hi Crystal I understand quite well what you mean. This was why I had those two words in my first post and wondered if anyone would catch on. (" Nurture and intuition.) I loved kids, always did. Besides the 11 children I helped raise I was also the Nannie for the res. When I lost my property and home  after divorcing my ex I moved to live with a friend on the reservation and from that time on until I left the res 5 years later I was babysitting for practically half the res on bingo nights.

I really miss not having children around the house especially during holidies and especially Christmas. I keep promising my beloved mate I won't cry this Christmas but I still do. Christmas eve I cry my eye balls out, miss children. Christmas just isn't Christmas without kids. Oh well it was pretty good this year my beloved bought me some trinkets, like one of those glass ball where you get snow when you shake it and it has Tinkerbell in it.

Got a dragon  stuffy with a doll to match it, I call them my toys. I guess it's not hard to tell who had just as much fun as the kids playing with the toys  She's learning fast on how my feelings and emotions work and sometimes I can also get quite excited over the little stuff.

Yea my youngest daughter did well to, she'd a child psychologist. 

Cindy

[mina.magpie]

emotional, irrational and irresponsible?

What aspects of "selling our bodies" exactly are emotional, irrational and irresponsible? Consenting adults should be free to do as they wish as long as they are not using coercive force or violence against the other.

Our society's poor relationship with prostitution, and with sex in general, is a direct result of a couple of thousand years worth of Abrahamic moral brainwashing. Beyond that argument, as long as the person providing such services is doing so of his or her own free will, what possible basis have we to prevent it? Perhaps instead of trying to stamp it out, if you find it so abhorrent, show people alternatives.

Mina.

[soldierjane]

Does being a women give us a license to be emotional, irrational and irresponsible?

If traditional expectations of stereotypes is acceptable why should women be considered equal? If indeed women can not live up to or expect to be afforded exceptions for their actions why should they be given equal rights as rights come with responsibilities?

You remind me of that Jack Nicholson quote from As Good as it Gets on how he created female characters: "I think of a man and I take away reason and accountability.". Being a woman doesn't mean you are excused being irresponsible or irrational, I don't know where you got that idea. I also think you are mistaken in measuring a woman using a male yardstick. Women have different ways of dealing with things, different workarounds. At the risk of sounding oh so 2nd wave, it seems the patriarchy colors your view of things.

About "selling one's body"... my body is mine to do what I want with it as long as I'm not harming others, don't you agree? Expression has nothing to do with it; it's cold, hard property.

You know you play an irritating game of chess, Mr. Spock?

[postoplesbian]

just perhaps in slightly different ways and different methods of expression.

Like selling our bodies?

AS YOU SAID ELSEWHERE:: You don't even like getting close to people at arms length due to their smell ,, let alone think about being intimate with them how can you even remark about others sexual life.

Yes i am a celibate 10 yr post op virgin but i do seek true love and would love to have sex one day and i would never judge peoples sexual lives as long as they weren't hurting children or other people by giving STDs without warnings and even then the other partner is responisble for their own protection. I was able to meet many street girls during my first few yrs opening trans safe homes so i got to meet others unlike me. I may not want to do what they do but i do not judge them i just try to help them.

Lisa i think your life working in the science field has put you way out away from real life. Yes your safe and yes you have your income to live off of and no you won't get others STDs but you need to know everyone is not like you nor should they be so. I say this because i do care for you and even like you but you need to step out of your past and try going out into the real world and seeing what you can do to bring some real life experiences in your life so you can see the other side of things. hugs Danielle

[lisagurl]

Believing in stereotypes is a self fulfilling prophesy. Marketing, the media and actions by some of the identified group reinforce and amplify the bigotry of the whole group. Then the community makes excuses for the behavior which also reinforces the stereotype. When does the view become objective and evaluation depend on measurement and not beliefs.

Yes this goes back thousands of years and is embedded in our very language. As children are trained to fit cultural stereotypes it is difficult to over come. The question is if people do really want to over come it?

Research has a huge amount of data that tells us that much of the perceived differences are learned and not biologically determined. Through practice people actually change their own brains to accept learned beliefs instead of exercising free will and becoming the best you can.

No two individuals are alike until they want to be alike.

[cindybc]

Hi Postoplesbian

Yes i am a celibate 10 yr post op virgin but i do seek true love and would love to have sex one day and i would never judge peoples sexual lives as long as they weren't hurting children or other people by giving STDs without warnings and even then the other partner is responisble for their own protection. I was able to meet many street girls during my first few yrs opening trans safe homes so i got to meet others unlike me. I may not want to do what they do but i do not judge them i just try to help them.

I can only say, my sentiment exactly. I find it a privilege and an honor to do what ever I can in my power to help anyone in need. I will be going back to work at the woman's shelter for a couple days of the week next Tuesday until I start working as a peer support worker where I may be putting in more days during the week.

Send me an email when you can Postoplesbian


Cindy

[lisagurl]

It seems that the majority culture in America is the bourgeois anyone outside that culture in this land of freedom is subject to problems as the majority has a fear of freedom. We live in this contradiction, a paradox. The more astute people will separate their identity from the virtual reality of life in public.