Are you socially isolated ?

[Hillary]

yeah I don't have any friends my age in real life :/

[AndrewLC]

No, not really.  I have tons of friends, and while there are days when I sit in my dorm rather than running off to hang out with friends, it's only because I want to sit around, not because I don't have stuff to do.

[Alyx.]

Not really, I love my friends.

I guess I'm just one of those magical social ->-bleeped-<-s... :\

[deviousxen]

I feel like most people avoid me, and I try to entertain people.. To be happy near them.

Apparently I'm not good enough to anyone geographically near me. I hate all of this crap...

[perfectisolation]

I'm extremely introverted and anxiety-ridden and it gets worse the more i isolate myself. i used to have friends but in my depression i lost them..
All the time i just focus on what people are thinking of me even if i dont want to, even if i wanna break free. i work myself up so bad, i get so extremely nervous that i slip up and just go blank when i speak.
it seems like a lot of TS/TG people are like this, i dunno maybe there's a corelation either genetically or with how we grew up feeling repressed.. im not sure i can blame all of this on my gender problems tho but its certainly played a part in this whole mess. even back as a kid, when my brain was on 'autopilot', i was still really shy and just kind of a weird kid, but i still made friends.
like you guys i wanna get out and meet people but its hard to get the courage, or to even know where to go or what to do or say. and yes its exhausting to socialize as well - especially being depressed, it just wears me out even imagining trying to keep friends..
i love having alone time but i think to a certain point it becomes unhealthy when you stay locked in your room all day and lose all your friends and have no relationship with your family members.. and then you do things like go on yahoo answers or youtube all day and just go bored out of your mind like i am now lol.. im pathetic..

[Nero]

I was socially isolated ( rejected by school mates )  not only because I was a very different little kid, but, also because my parents insisted and got a lawyer to back them, that I was to be isolated from the main body of the school...Therefore I began my early life with my parents, siblings and special educators. I was in a forced isolation. It wasn't until I became a teenager of 14ish and 15, that I was taken out into the larger more complex world.  It took nearly 20 years of therapy, to acclimate me enough to be able to venture around without total supervision...I am still edgy today. I am a split of extroverted/and introverted.  Depends on the situation.

It does not surprise me at all, that many or most MtF's/ FtM's grew up more or less isolated and friendless. Trans-gendered people have a vibe that we send off, that others pick upon, that we are not who we seem to be...it hurts us socially, very terribly I know. Enough sometimes, that it pushes TS's to the brink of ending their lives.  Knowing your not that different from the rest of us, young and old,  and have  a place to share some of the same mental pains and internalized loneliness...should be of some comfort to you. We are all here for the same reasons...to share our experiences, and learn within an environment of love and openness. Nobody should be here that wants to just create anarchy in the forums and posts.  Hugs and Love...

Too true.

[GnomeKid]

eh... a little Have 3 really good friends in a bit of a slump
I live with my best friend so I always have her...
My neighbor from my parents house lives 10 mins away still and we normally hang out quite a bit but with the intense load of school and varying work schedules not so much
My third lives a good bit away[30+ mins] so that is an issue

I don't have issues with being social once I start meeting people, but I am very slow at getting comfortable with new groups and people.  I hate large groups and would rather havea a couple really good friends than a lot of friends.  I had no trouble with social situations until I moved across the country and became a sort of hermit for almost a year.  I became comfortable at that school and then graduated.  I went to a school quite near my high school and as most of my friends were younger than me and still around I didn't bother getting myself out there to meet new people. Now I'm finally bothering to get myself out there and hang out with my peers.   

Approaching new people makes me extremely nervous and uncomfortable... If I'm only going to meet you once I'm absolutely insane but if I'm going to see you regularly I can never think of anything to say and just wish I could sink into the ground... I think that stems more from my ADHD and middle school friends calling me annoying due to my over enthusiasm and hyperactivity.  I don't really fear people rejecting me for the gender issues at least not the people I'm sort of starting to hang out with now... Theatre majors are generally very open minded...

I've told a couple about my top surgery and may be rooming with one of them next year...

[Shana A]

I've always been introverted, although I can be outgoing in my work. I have a few close friends and my partner, otherwise I tend to spend a lot of time alone by choice. Some of it is my nature, some of it is needing quiet time to compose and write, and some of it is hating to have to go out in the world being perceived as someone I'm not.

Z

[Reese]

I have friends; I've a great group of guys who include me in most of their activities, even though they know nothing of my desire to transition male. I worked hard to gain their approval, to get invited to the events that other girls don't go to; but I still feel lonely. It's said that any type of isolation is enough to drive men mad; leadership, or a secret that you can share with no one.

I'm surrounded by friends often, but I still feel isolated, because at the moment people see me as neither male nor female; they have a hard time relating with me, and I know somehow I'm missing out on so much.

[postoplesbian]

I'm curious has anyone ever been so introverted most of their life that they find it harder and harder to break free of this void of emptiness ? I know for a fact that I myself seem to be in this rut at 22 now , no friends , no social existance , but longing to be able to find a group of people just right for me !

I have a gang of 54 cows i hang with every day and 13 chickens and 7 goats and 2 cats and of course my horse buddy so am i aloneeeeee yesssssssssssssssssss helppppppppppppppp i need a paaaaarrrrrtttttnnnneeeerrrrrr

[Reese]

I'm curious has anyone ever been so introverted most of their life that they find it harder and harder to break free of this void of emptiness ? I know for a fact that I myself seem to be in this rut at 22 now , no friends , no social existance , but longing to be able to find a group of people just right for me !

I have a gang of 54 cows i hang with every day and 13 chickens and 7 goats and 2 cats and of course my horse buddy so am i aloneeeeee yesssssssssssssssssss helppppppppppppppp i need a paaaaarrrrrtttttnnnneeeerrrrrr

What? No sheep? I'm sorry, I can't be your friend. Sheep are required for my friendship.

[yvbwsf]

I'm curious has anyone ever been so introverted most of their life that they find it harder and harder to break free of this void of emptiness ? I know for a fact that I myself seem to be in this rut at 22 now , no friends , no social existance , but longing to be able to find a group of people just right for me !

I had to check your username just in case i posted this one and didnt remember!

Its a little different for me, i have friends, infact i have alot of friends and i know a hell of alot of people however from the age of about 13 i have hidden myself from all of them including family, i created a different me for people to see and to be friends with as i couldnt risk them finding out about the REAL me plus i dont even know who or what that is!

The place i have found my self in now is i have no one! i have people around me but i cant talk to any of them about why im so depressed, why i dont enjoy life and these crazy feelings i have. im completly alone even tho i have poeple around me. i cry myself to sleep almost every night and on the rare occasion that i dont i wake up in the middle of the night with tears in my eyes.

If god came to me and said i will give you any one thing that you want, most people would choose, money, love, house etc. All i want is...... someone to hold me, tell me everything is going to be alright and help me find out why i hate my life. someone to rest my head on watching tv, this isnt a sexual need, i need someone that i can show the real me to even if it will be incredibly hard and scary.

Just want you to know that you aint the only one, i have a void inside of me that i dont understand, want, or have a clue how to fill. it actually phyiscally hurts on occasion.

Anyway i've talked too much, i always do that!

[postoplesbian]

WHAT WE NEED IS A PLACE OF OUR OWN  where we can all be together and help one another.. I am thinking of traveling this spring thru the mounains of the west and living off the land. I would love to have a gang of us traveling with horses and animals and such planting foods in the summer and then traveling south for the winter but staying out of towns and cities and just being a nomadic TS group.. anyone want to join me

[tekla]

WHAT WE NEED IS A PLACE OF OUR OWN  where we can all be together and help one another.. I am thinking of traveling this spring thru the mounains of the west and living off the land. I would love to have a gang of us traveling with horses and animals and such planting foods in the summer and then traveling south for the winter but staying out of towns and cities and just being a nomadic TS group

One - 'Nomadic' vs. 'a place of our own' seem to be in conflict with each other.
Two - Most of the land in the US is owned.  Just 'planting stuff' from time to time is going to be seen as trespassing.
Three - The harder times get, the more people will welcome you with a gun.
Four - You need real skills, and I don't see many people in here with those.  I'll take Steph, a mechanic, a few others seem to have some real skills, but the bulk of people who get out of the house long enough to get a job, are doing 'art' or 'IT' or similar worthless things in a survival setting.

[postoplesbian]

WHAT WE NEED IS A PLACE OF OUR OWN  where we can all be together and help one another.. I am thinking of traveling this spring thru the mounains of the west and living off the land. I would love to have a gang of us traveling with horses and animals and such planting foods in the summer and then traveling south for the winter but staying out of towns and cities and just being a nomadic TS group

One - 'Nomadic' vs. 'a place of our own' seem to be in conflict with each other.
Two - Most of the land in the US is owned.  Just 'planting stuff' from time to time is going to be seen as trespassing.
Three - The harder times get, the more people will welcome you with a gun.
Four - You need real skills, and I don't see many people in here with those.  I'll take Steph, a mechanic, a few others seem to have some real skills, but the bulk of people who get out of the house long enough to get a job, are doing 'art' or 'IT' or similar worthless things in a survival setting.

1 a place of our own is with each other each day and night
2 there is lots of federal land we can use all over the USA in national forest etc
3 we will kill the people we meet with loveee
4 i have skills to make a sauna with hides and using rocks and herbs splashed on the rocks to provide a way to clean oneself and there are lots of wild foods like wild onions and lettuces and animals for the meat eaters and we can sleep in a teepee and move as a nomdaic unit doing some farm work to earn some etra funds well for those who don't have an income and we can use my buggy as a chuck wagon to carry lots of food and supplies its been done many times and there is right now a guy named lee the logger who is traveling the USA with his 3 horses across many roads and has his hay stored underneath his gypsy wagon http://www.leehorselogger.com/

Ye Haw! From Brook, Wyoming, 30 miles south of Douglas.

I am currently in winter quarters. The horses are settling down for a long
winter of work; we are going to spend the winter logging.

I got to Caspar, Wyoming, when I realized it was time to stop for the
winter. Two winters of traveling while sick was more than enough. So,
here we are.

Besides being exhausted, health issues have gotten to a point where I
have to deal with them. At this time, things are of a critical but minor
nature.

I had planned to go on to Salt Lake City, but because of the weather,
health issues, distance and economics, I decided to stay in Wyoming. I
have met many incredible people in this area and I feel as if I am home.

That having been said, next March I will begin to travel again. In the
meantime I will be taking pictures of my logging projects.

I hope everyone will keep coming back to this website and follow my trip
next Spring.

My sincere thanks to everyone for your kind words and help.

Ye Haw!
Lee the Horselogger

[Wendy C]

WHAT WE NEED IS A PLACE OF OUR OWN  where we can all be together and help one another.. I am thinking of traveling this spring thru the mounains of the west and living off the land. I would love to have a gang of us traveling with horses and animals and such planting foods in the summer and then traveling south for the winter but staying out of towns and cities and just being a nomadic TS group.. anyone want to join me

If it was'nt for my wife, daughter, four grandchildren, her two dogs and cat that I'm helping to support n my home right now, I'd consider it. I've considered it, when do we leave, lol.

Oh, excuse me, sorry, the thread topic, yes. I have felt like a loner my intire life, have no one I ever knew to be a close friend other than my wife, which is all she will be now anyway. I never felt right in my own skin to be comfortable with other people. The last couple of years I attended Church, I tried to involve myself in the mens club and Church offices but I always felt like a duck out of water and still never made close friends.

Since I have gotten to point where  I am FT except for my job and will be FT there next month I find myself coming out of my shell. I no longer hide myself, my feelings or my trans if the subject comes up. It is a freedom that is still new to me and I suspect it will be that way for awhile. Sixty-one years is a long time to be lonely which is why I rejoice with the young women and men here. Hugs

Wendy

[yvbwsf]

Four - You need real skills, and I don't see many people in here with those.  I'll take Steph, a mechanic, a few others seem to have some real skills, but the bulk of people who get out of the house long enough to get a job, are doing 'art' or 'IT' or similar worthless things in a survival setting.

When i was young about 10-14yrs all i ever did was play in my local woods with a few friends building dens etc. my dad (the only usefull thing he has ever done for me) hired a survival guy to come and show us a thing or two, the only good day i spent with my dad. Because of that i have basic survival skills....

Shelter construction (seems easy, tis not lol)
Fire building from man made ignitions (matches, lighter)
I can also make fire by 'playing the fiddle' is hard tho
i can also hunt both with a firearm or snaring & traps
I know that silver birch can be used as bandage and the sap if filtered is an antiseptic.

If i lived in the US id come along, i love the countryside. there aint a feeling in the world that can beat setting of in a morning with a small tent, a parang, flint kit and a knife and by night having a fire with food cooking and a camp organised.

I organise an event once a year for my friends where we go onto the Bronte Moors in Yorkshire with a few supplies, stop of at a trout farm on the way and pick up a couple then cook it in a coal and moss fire pit, i dont like fish but cooked that way its gorgues (i really cant spell!)

anyway i talk too much

[tekla]

If you dealt with the Art world and it's clientele, then you wouldn't be calling it useless work

I have, I do, and I am.  Art is a luxury in a survival environment.  And I've worked with lots of 'smart' people, and I'm often just as amazed as to how little they really understand about doing things. 

And the military goes to excessive lengths to test people and develop skills that they have within them.  I've had people who have no mechanical experience who caught on real quick, others, never get it.  You can't take the chance on having half the people do 95% of the work.  As often happens.

[Sophie90]

[ quote ] Four - "You need real skills, and I don't see many people in here with those.  I'll take Steph, a mechanic, a few others seem to have some real skills, but the bulk of people who get out of the house long enough to get a job, are doing 'art' or 'IT' or similar worthless things in a survival setting" .  [quote unquote]

I'm sorry; but this remark I have to respond to...In a survival situation; you'd be very surprised at how quickly someone will who has no experience can pick-up/learn in short order, the crucial knowledge that will help them and their group survive. The military does it all the time, with raw recruits.

If you dealt with the Art world and it's clientele, then you wouldn't be calling it useless work. I have painted murals that were 12' x 24', that earned me $38,000 for the one. I have sold other paintings and sculptures for many thousands of dollars a piece. The people with the money to contract and purchase such things, are not worried about an underground bunker out in the woods someplace...the wealthy will always survive no matter what.

The world needs ditch diggers, and it also wants Artisans... 

Is "art" not defined by its uselessness?
Art has no other purpose than being art.

A watercolour of a cat is not going to sow a field of corn.

[tekla]

A watercolour of a cat is not going to sow a field of corn.

Not to mention, "waiting for the inspiration" to sow that field of corn.