TORN BETWEEN TWO WORLDS

[postoplesbian]

TORN BETWEEN TWO WORLDS

ONE OF COMFORT WITH PEOPLE I NEVER GET

ONE WITH THE SPIRITS I ALWAYS FEEL

The following is a post i sent out to a group of rainbow people. Yes i know comfort in my shed but also i know or feel the spirits above calling me to walk.

Hello i am a Twospirit + my rainbow name is whitecloud from 1982 rainbow Boise Idaho.I was the delivery owner of the truck that brought the food from the co-op to the land. Before then i had started a recycling center in 1975 in southern Humboldt county Calif at the redway container site. I was the first person to monitor the site after the garberville burning dump was closed. Others took over what i started and its still running to this day. I have been serving above for many years trying to educate all about the need to conserve and preserve mother earth. I am presently living on a farm in central Pa and i travel by horse and buggy and help an elderly amish couple with their organic farm. Previously i had built green homes in delaware county Pa and helped recovering addicts with safe homes from 1986 to 1997. From 2001 to 2004 and have helped two spirit people to have safe homes around the USA. From 2004 to 2008 i helped two elders and planted many fruit trees and berries. From feb 2007 till today i have volunteered to get Barack Obama elected in hopes of stoping the warring. I have lived all over the USA doing many positive things to help educate people about the need to use less. In 2004 i gave away the balance of all i owned to be poor and be able to hear from the spirits above more clearly. I am preparing for the up coming days ahead where i will travel by walking and with my horse and leave the buggy behind and live off mother earth. I seek others who are so inspired to lead this life. I am of great health and ability to survive and do the spirits above bidding. Previous to this i had recycled newspaper in the 60's and had a 5 story treehouse where many gathered. I have walked the USA from 1970 to 1973 watching interstates being built. That made me cry. I had met wesmoreland an elder american indian from the mescularo tribe who was a botanist at the university of Texas yet he gave me a ride from misoula montana to the yakima valley in 1970 as he cried to me about many things over that couple of days. I am close friends with Mark creekwater who walks. I have camped out alone at the US Capital in 2002 for 23 days and nights by the reflecting pool over the plight of many two spirit people who suffer. I met the french woman who has camped out at the whitehouse protesting nuclear bombs for 30 yrs now. All i do is guided by the spirits above who are alive with me as i have one foot in this world and one in the next. When we die we only shed our shells our spirits live forever. I have planted many trees around the USA which i will watch grow from the next world from whence i came and to where i will return. I have two blood children but i also have two others in africa i support and neither child is more important than the others. I know my life here on earth is only half done even though i am past 50. I have much work to do. I do not hear well from people on earth. The spirits guide me and they are telling me to go to the wilds to be able to hear more clearly. The words i say are meant for me if they speak to another then so be it. If they do then they are from the spirits above and i am only the vehicle for their words. One day i hope to go back to a rainbow gathering with pride in my heart but until that day i have too much to do. So i end with a chant.

My Indian name is whitecloud. I am proud to be a world indian. I am always on the peacepath. Everyone is an indian from somewhere. However, not everyone acts like one. Be true to self and listen to the spirits above and let them be your guide.
HOKAHEY = http://www.native-languages.org/iaq21.htm


Wichi tai tai, timurai, Hura-nika, Hura-nika
Hey-ney, Hey-ney, Noh-wah

Wichi tai tai, timurai, Hura-nika, Hura-nika
Hey-ney, Hey-ney, Noh-wah



................................... ................................................... .......................................

Wichi Tai Tai - Spirit of the Wind
(Water spirits are running round inside my head. I'm so glad I'm alive!)

Wichi tai tai, timurai, Hura-nika, Hura-nika
Hey-ney, Hey-ney, Noh-wah

Wichi tai tai, timurai, Hura-nika, Hura-nika
Hey-ney, Hey-ney, Noh-wah

Spirit of the wind, carry me
Spirit of the wind, carry me home
Spirit of the wind, carry me home to myself

Behold, Behold, A sacred voice is calling us
Behold, Behold, All over the sky
A sacred voice is calling us
Behold, Behold, Behold


............................... .............................. ......................................



Water spirits springin', springin' round my head
Makes me feel glad that I'm not dead
(Singin') Water spirits springin', springin' round my head
Makes me feel glad that I'm not dead

Part 2:
Wichi tai-tai,
Nee-mo-wah
Wo-rah-neeka, wo-rah-neeka
Hey-nay, hey-nay, no-wah
Wichi tai-tai,
Nee-mo-wah
Wo-rah-neeka, wo-rah-neeka
Hey-nay, hey-nay, no-wah
Wichi tai-tai,
No-wah
A-wichi tai-tai,
No-wah



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"Inasmuch as you have done it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you have done it to me."




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Life here on earth is but a dream of the true spiritual world from whence we came and to where we will return

[aisha]

deep down, being a shaman is the desire to die, its not even the desire, you can't die if you have desire, its justs apathy

towards life, which is actually death
its when someone should have dead
but they didn't
so they have their feet in both worlds
in purgatory some would call it
they can hear echoes as if they were dead, of their past life
your neck hanging by a thread? why not end it completely?
ever go to a funeral? the truth.. seeps in slowly into your life
maybe you did actually die? maybe this is heaven
everything was explained, everything made so much sense
but in this world of life so much is refused, there are a lot of people with a lot of beliefs
and it could be anyway
but having died, everyone is set in their last thoughts
that is their absolute truth
but what is that even?
we are already dead, but the story goes on
is this hell? how many times has this happened? is desire the cause of it?
of life?
but then I see, everyone who dies, how they become a part of me, or a part of everything..
it is recognizable.
Sham'ans intoxicate themselves into a frenzy of divine inspiration to go into the nether realms where the hell gates and the

heaven gates stare wide open at us but we don't really go through either.
life is just a funeral and i see everybody at the end gates being like I wish it was me
so I just tried cross dressing and transgender because those were things i really wanted to do and things i hid in the world

for other people.. i was just wanting to die, but not wanting to hurt myself
so i guess this is the proverbial 3 blunts of the best weed ever and a bag of shrooms..
tell those ayahuasca dudes i didnt say anything
because thats what life is... life is like some dude is killing you
and he's like is there any >-bleeped-< you wanna do because you're about to die
and he's a good guy, he respects whats happening so you can say whatever you want
and he does it, thats why you get what you want truly and deeply inside, the honest truth
maybe some people would say not what you want but what you need
and then you move on, >-bleeped-<ing a

"thats why it always seems like people are talking about sex.. life is sex, on an acid trip.. i had thought that"

but I think there is a way to make life better, and that is stop judging between life and death and black and white and male and female and up and bown, and good and bad, and better and worse, this is the only way, but its always every way

and thats the thing, life is always gonna make you happy, that is its going to give you exactly what you want with no question because it is you and there is no difference, like you haven't even read more, you haven't even done anything more the words go on far beyond the page, thats what I wrote to my friend once, and he was like, you haven't done anything more,  you've just said that you did a bunch of >-bleeped-<. yeah.. that is the case.
and its like i look at people and myself of all ages and see childishness every action is premature and for no ultimate reason, you know what that is? that is stupid people. that is people who just want to do things and not think, those are the ghosts, the dead body that is still falling to the ground, the jnani, whatever. end that, be totally at peace.