Wow! I went back to the first page to read your first post Ashling, and I have on many occasions thought of the same thing. It would be very interesting to see how far this thread will evolve to.
Here is an essay I sent to a medical student, Dr Meghan, who was studying transsexuality. To a greater degree my essay is centered around preparation for SRS as well a transitioning from trance to becoming a woman.
Are you preparing for SRS? Then may I make a few more small points about why many post op TS-girls don't come back? It is not just because of pride, nor is it being just unwilling to admit they are hurting and need help in some way or another. This hurting can be from different living pains. Problems adjusting to daily life, isolating, inability to make friends, problems with family, boy friends, girl friends, difficulties at work, or difficulties finding a job, resulting in money problems, etc.
Yes, some of the problems before SRS may not change all that much and can be carried over after SRS, unless dealt with prior to SRS. This is why it is also important that you learn to adjust to the circumstances and work on resolving possible problems beforehand, even if the full time experience has to be extended in order to do so. Be prepared and conditioned to live in the preferred gender, female in this case. Some actually make the error and neglect or wait for the last moment to prepare for this and as a result they are at a loss or in the dark as to how to live like a woman when they come out at the other end of transitioning.
There is a lot more to becoming a woman then just looking good in the physical image and body. Evolving physically as a passable woman is wonderful for your self-image and will be a great asset to your credibility. But evolving within, the inner self, is also very important. This growth I believe is both psychological and spiritual in nature and in this respect we have only begun the journey into womanhood.
This learning and growing will continue for the rest of our lives. I am 9 years full time and I am still discovering and learning different facets about the growing inner self. A GG on the other hand has grown-up or evolved to be who she is from early childhood to wherever she finds herself in her present life, then followed by all the experiences from teenage puberty to womanhood, to conceiving a child and childbirth. But then, even a GG still undergoes and experiences growth within throughout her whole life. It's much like preparing for a new job, like it is wise to learn what all are the different aspects and responsibilities of your job going to be before just jumping in
blindfolded.
Do you know what being a woman is and what living as a woman is like? The feelings, thoughts, and how she perceives the environment around her and other people she interacts with everyday? To be sure, there are physical differences between women and men and contemporary society has managed to blur them to the point that they are not easily seen. Both genders can perform many of the same tasks and show little difference in other observable ways. But the greater difference between a woman and a man I believe would be inward. Now these ideas are only samples, not hard scientific fact. But it's not really as big a deal as it may seem. Just let instinct and intuition guide you. Estrogen will stimulate and awaken instinct and intuition to a fair degree.
I do know some post op TS-girls that have moved on with their lives and have done well for
themselves. They have good jobs and have even settled down with either a male or female partner. But unfortunately I have seen some end up alone and very lonely mostly because of fear of changing their circumstances for whatever their reason, real, imaginary, or self-imposed. That is something else about post ops. They are quite close-lipped about what is going on in their lives even if the return to the TS message boards to say something.
I will be back tomorrow and we can discuss more about after post op. Tomorrow is my day off so I will be here to check the boards. Sorry for getting back to you so late.
Part #2
Can transitioning have a happy end result? Can this really happen? It is possible for anyone to find contentment, peace, and happiness if they so desire and are willing to work and persevere for it. I mean if an old bat like me survived what I did and came out the other end smelling like roses, literally, anyone can do it.
Even regular people or cisgendered people, what ever, would be envious if not jealous of the way my apparent fairy tail life has progressed, from rags.....well not riches, reasonably well to do I suppose, I guess. Perhaps Cinderella and her glass slipper and her princess Wing Walker who came to the rescue. You know what? I deserve a good life after all the crap I had to bear getting here. If I had not chosen transition I may not be here to type out this story. I have only come here to try to share and impart what has been so freely given to me by Great Spirit.
I followed the call and found my journey to be filled with new discoveries and new things to learn about life and living.
So many wonderful things to see and experience, and so much beauty to enjoy. Like a young lady discovering her new role in life for the first time. If I would have stayed back there sitting on that fence I truly believe I would have stagnated and would have shriveled up into an empty dried out husk and blown away in the wind. But the shell was not empty, it was filled with the beautiful spirit of the girl child within. This beautiful child that would have been no more.
I gave her rebirth and allowed her to grow into her own being, the beautiful being that she has grown to be today. But the growth does not end, the girl child grows and matures into a lady and later she will become a wise, caring, and loving elder. It is the same process as any other genetic woman. The growth never ends, from child to crone. The growth and changes will continue until the time comes for me to relinquish the shell and take flight into the next existence.
Until then I will do what I can to continue to light the way for others to follow, The calling that has beckoned me since early childhood. This is what I *need* to do not want. I have overcome the disorder of GID, I have survived the streets and alcoholism and I am now at long last free to do what my heart desires most, to help those who were once the lot I was part of.
I do pray this was instrumental information for some
There are more of such ramblings in my Blog, Cindy's Rambling Blogs
With Love Cindy
