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How accepting is the area you live in?

Started by Natalie3174, February 21, 2009, 01:30:24 AM

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Steffi

I've no idea whereabouts you are, but there are a real lot of trans support groups around. If you make the correct inquiries, you can probably find one somewhere near you.
When you've been living alone with your secret, it can be very reassuring and comforting to go to such a group and meet up with others.

Just because you don't see them doesn't mean that there aren't any there  ;)
To those who understand, I extend my hand
To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am
Not under your command, I know where I stand
I won't change to fix your plan, Take me as I am (Dreamtheatre - As I Am)
I started out with nothing..... and I still have most of it left.
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Naturally Blonde

Re: How accepting is the area you live in?

They do not know my original origins therefor it's not a problem.
Living in the real world, not a fantasy
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Nikki

I'm in the same boat...very rural, economically depressed town.

Some may call us Rednecks? Actully, I'm sure many do.

Not exactly a warm and loving mecca for transexuals.
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Naturally Blonde

Quote from: Steffi on April 17, 2009, 09:40:02 PM
I've no idea whereabouts you are, but there are a real lot of trans support groups around. If you make the correct inquiries, you can probably find one somewhere near you.
When you've been living alone with your secret, it can be very reassuring and comforting to go to such a group and meet up with others.

Just because you don't see them doesn't mean that there aren't any there  ;)

I'm transsexual and do not want to know about transgendered support groups and does not relate to my RLT. My objective is and always has been to live as a female. So far I am percieved as female and not a transsexual which is comforting. Even long before transition I was usually percieved as female so people do not see any changes so it's not a problem to those around me.
Living in the real world, not a fantasy
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lisa_a

I dont think it as very good. Most people I've ever known have always made negative remarks about transsexuality. My maybe best friend that I thought was quite open minded suddenly complained angrily a while back ago that a woman in his close family brought up her son as a girl. And she did it only because she wanted a daughter and that she destroyed him and he guaranteed was to change sex when he was 16 start being with boys. I was struck dumb. Tried to explain that maybe this was what the boy wanted, and that the mother was extraordinary for not caring what other people think. This went on for a while, I tried to explain these things. Suddenly he just shut down. In the evening when we where together again, and some other people arrived. I brought this up again, since I had not been able to let it go. Then he just told me firmly while the other listened. That i'd been totally ->-bleeped-<-ed up again, and so(to fingers together)close to getting a fist in my face. Then I was really struck dumb. So I just said, yeah, whatever.

So I suppose that is what I have to look forward to. The strange thing is that we have talked about sex switching before. And I said that I would like to do it. I wonder if he was just joking around. This was also a serious family issue. So maybe something more behind-or finally showed his true feelings. So, I don't know, I seriously hope not all people are like this. Then it is very important to really pass I think.
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Jennywocky

I live in Central PA, in Harrisburg (state capital) about 45 minutes north of Lancaster.

Harrisburg city is actually very progressive, it was one of the first cities in the country to include transgender people under its sexual discrimination cause (waaaay back in 1983). Pretty much we are accepted anywhere in the city, and our support group is actually sponsored by some downtown restaurants, and we openly frequent them with our business. On meeting nights or for holiday dinners, usually one of them will take our 16-20 member party (many of who are noticeably trans) without any problems with anything at all, and they have bumped other groups in order to make room for us because they like us as people.

Which is hilarious, because we are surrounded by "red-state" thinking otherwise. Our elections before 2008 went Bush by at least 10% in our county. Lancaster is of course "Amish territory" and things are kinda hard down there for my trans brethren. The few trans people I know down there come up here for the support meetings.

Leaving the city and going into the suburbs, it gets a little weirder. I think how one is accepted depends on appearance, unfortunately. If you look good, even if you get read, then people just accept it; if you look bad, then they get testier. I've also seen transpeople working in various stores (Pennys, Lowe's, Home Depot, Pier One, etc.)

The one bad place is the churches. Individuals will accept you, if they know you; but I don't feel particuarly welcome in many churches. I attend MCC right now because I know I am accepted there with open arms. I left my old church because I knew it would cause a huge rift (I was prominent in the worship ministry). The few people I truly valued there are actually non-judging and have invited me over to see them, but other people I know would raise the roof if I showed up there. Disappointing.

I've actually had good experiences at the bank(s) and other places where I had to "come out" inadvertently (i.e., had to show my ID for some reason) -- I actually received words of encouragement from tellers and others, which I think is so positive.  And at my workplace, despite all the religious people there, only 3-5 out of 80 or so have been "weird" around me, the rest were so accepting. So I inclined to think it's a few bad apples screwing up the community churches, while even most of the religious people -- if they know you and know you to be a decent person -- will try to accept you.

All in all, it has been far BETTER than I had ever hoped it would be.
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tekla

In my village, although I haven't socialised much in 30 years I've lived here

Given that, what exactly do you lay claim to knowing?  Not much. I'm sure.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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K8

I live in a university town surrounded by a very conservative area in the American west.  I've found this place amazingly accepting.  I'm only on day four of living fulltime, but so far so good.

As an example, I got an email from a woman I barely know, asking for information related to some volunteer work.  I sent her the information and ended my email this way: I should have mentioned it when I was talking to you, but I am working on becoming a woman, which is what I've always wanted to be.  I have quite a ways to go, but I'm already starting to use the name Katherine (or Kate).  So...
Cheers,
Kate


Her reply: Thanks, Kate.

To me, those two words speak volumes.

- Kate
Life is a pilgrimage.
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Steffi

Quote from: teklaIn my village, although I haven't socialised much in 30 years I've lived here

Given that, what exactly do you lay claim to knowing?  Not much. I'm sure.
WTF is wrong with you and your attitude girl?
What makes you take one part of a line, quote it completely put of context and then make some smart assed remark???
Get a life.
Get an attitude adjustment.

The full line, even separated from the rest of the post was:-
In my village, although I haven't socialised much in 30 years I've lived here, most people knew me by sight at least.
The point being that "everybody" knew who I was as a male and now "everybody" sees me around the village presenting as female and they don't seem to have a problem with it.

Sheesh.....some people....... ::)
To those who understand, I extend my hand
To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am
Not under your command, I know where I stand
I won't change to fix your plan, Take me as I am (Dreamtheatre - As I Am)
I started out with nothing..... and I still have most of it left.
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K8

Quote from: Steffi on April 30, 2009, 12:07:01 AM
In my village, although I haven't socialised much in 30 years I've lived here, most people knew me by sight at least.

I'm transitioning in a small town, too.  I think it makes it harder and easier at the same time.  It is one thing to go where no one knows you and so assumes that what they see is what you've always been.  It's another to be where most of the people you see during the day recognize that you presented male last week or last month.  I certainly don't know everyone in town, but I have to assume that most people I see in town recognize me for what I am - someone who had been presenting male who is transitioning to being a woman.  There may be an awkwardness in it, but there is also a comfort in no longer having to lie to people.  :) 

I'm lucky to be here.

- Kate
Life is a pilgrimage.
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