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What If Your Parents "Knew Everything" When You Were Young?

Started by Julie Marie, February 27, 2009, 10:53:13 AM

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pretty pauline

If only my Mother knew sooner, I would have transition sooner, my parents didn't find out till I came out at 16, then they fully surpported me 100%
If they realized say when I was 5 or 6, they would have rared me as a girl, but they didn't know, when I was 16 my Mother was thrilled to bits I was to become her daughter, it was my Mother who suggested that I eventual have srs, which I did. My early childhood was so unhappy, if only my parents knew then, anyway fast forward all these years, with my parents 100% surpport, Im now really a woman at last.
p
If your going thru hell, just keep going.
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soldierjane

Much as my mom says now that she wishes she had known sooner, that she would have helped me and supported me, I doubt it. I'm glad things have changed since the early 90s in the world, in my family and in my body :)
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Alyx.

My parents would just ignore it.

They are good at that too...

Yeah, and you would think something was wrong with a boy who wanted long hair, wore his mother's shoes and pretended he was a cheerleader...  :o
If you do not agree to my demands... TOO LATE
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kytheragraves

"Reparative" therapy. Mood stabilizers. ECT. Nothing good.  :(
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Andrew

Wow. I guess my mom is rare. She always let me be who I was - the little girl with short hair and Star Wars-themed clothing. I know that she would have taken me to a good therapist and let me live as I wanted to. (Did I mention that she bought me a new shirt when I told her, then paid for my hormones and surgery?) My dad would've flipped, but she always got her way with parenting, and I'm sure this'd be no different.
Lock up yer daughters.
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cindianna_jones

My father would have beat me.  He liked to kick while he whipped with his belt.

My mother would have screamed at me non stop.

That's what would have happened.

As it was, my dad did say something to the effect that I'd better not show up in a dress or else.  Mom was out of her mind and pretty much wrote me off and told me to leave the state.

It was harsh.  So, I'm very glad that I didn't get caught when I was a child.

Cindi
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Sandy

It seems interesting.

This is a generalization, it's hardly scientific, nor can any statistics be gathered, but;

The older of us seem to have either expected or received very harsh treatment from their parents.

While the younger of us seem to have been met with less severe responses.

Could it be that there has been a change in the mental makeup of the populace between the older generation and the younger?

If so, could there be hope for us as a species?

-Sandy
Out of the darkness, into the light.
Following my bliss.
I am complete...
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mina.magpie

My dad back then was so wrapped up in work that I didn't get to know him all that well, so I don't know how he'd have reacted, though positively, I think. My mom would have blamed herself quietly, looking for what she did wrong or what happened for me to be like this (that's been kinda her reaction to it now). I think initially they'd have been opposed and tried to get me "fixed", but they're both understanding, rational people and I believe they'd have come around after not too long.

Mina.
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Kirin

Quote from: Sandy on March 01, 2009, 06:59:14 AM
It seems interesting.

This is a generalization, it's hardly scientific, nor can any statistics be gathered, but;

The older of us seem to have either expected or received very harsh treatment from their parents.

While the younger of us seem to have been met with less severe responses.

Could it be that there has been a change in the mental makeup of the populace between the older generation and the younger?

If so, could there be hope for us as a species?

-Sandy

I certainly hope so. From what I've seen, I'm optimistic; I even hope that most of the next generation of transgendered (and gay, etc.) individuals will only have to deal with mild discomfort from their parents, and no worse. Fingers crossed. ^-^
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Julie Marie

Quote from: Sandy on March 01, 2009, 06:59:14 AM
It seems interesting.

This is a generalization, it's hardly scientific, nor can any statistics be gathered, but;

The older of us seem to have either expected or received very harsh treatment from their parents.

While the younger of us seem to have been met with less severe responses.

Could it be that there has been a change in the mental makeup of the populace between the older generation and the younger?

-Sandy

There's no doubt this is the trend.  But consider the available information back when we were growing up to the information today. 

I was 16 when I first saw the word "->-bleeped-<-" in a TIME magazine article.  I calculated from that I was one in a million.  I had no hope of ever finding happiness.  And it took another 27 years before I met another TG person.

Prejudice is overcome through education.  Today's parents have some level of knowledge about LGBT people.  My parents only "knew" homos were perverts and a transsexual was that freak (Christine Jorgensen) who went to Sweden a man and came back a woman.  But no matter how you sliced it, they were all dregs of society.

While there are still plenty of parents stuck in the past, there are many more who won't stick their heads in the sand and pretend nothing is wrong.

To all you "younger" TGs, realize how lucky you are growing up in a time when ignorance isn't the order of the day.

Julie
When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.
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Sheila

I think they knew something was wrong. In fact I know they knew something was wrong, they were in complete denial. I had a couple of surgeries right after being born and I can explain one scar but not the other. When I had GRS, I had some scar tissue in places where it didn't go with the surgeries that I was suppose to have. I overheard my grandparents talking with my mom that I would be OK and that my grandfather would teach me things. My dad kind of disowned me and stayed away then divorced my mom or I should say she kicked him out. I was caught, not directly, by my mom, crossdressing. Was told to stop that. She has denied that she has ever said that. My sister caught me a few times. Mom overlooked it and then I needed to play football. They taught me how to kill animals, I got use to that then had a nevous breakdown at 45. My grandmother and other aunts all said I should have been a girl, but I was a big kid. Why would they say such a thing when I was big. They bought me weights and books on how to take motors apart. Everytime I got into a motor, I broke something or screwed something up. I hated oil and gas on my hands, let along dripping down my arm or it squirting into my face. I never understood how the whole motor worked but I did like the muscle cars of the 60's and early 70's. I love to drive fast and could drive and still like to drive fast and hard. It is like an orgasm to me.
So, I really think they knew something but didn't want to say anything. My mom was not surprised when I told her my transexual status and going for surgery. Either was my sister, she was a year younger.
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Nero

Quote from: Sandy on March 01, 2009, 06:59:14 AM
It seems interesting.

This is a generalization, it's hardly scientific, nor can any statistics be gathered, but;

The older of us seem to have either expected or received very harsh treatment from their parents.

While the younger of us seem to have been met with less severe responses.

Could it be that there has been a change in the mental makeup of the populace between the older generation and the younger?

If so, could there be hope for us as a species?

-Sandy

I hope so. It certainly looks that way. Of course, there will always be other factors at work such as religion and strictness of parents.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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Sheila

There are more religious groups that are accepting people on who they are. They are trying not to be judgemental anymore. They are letting "God" be their judge and not them.
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Nero

Quote from: Sheila on March 01, 2009, 05:18:01 PM
There are more religious groups that are accepting people on who they are. They are trying not to be judgemental anymore. They are letting "God" be their judge and not them.

that's good news.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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sd

I do a lot of work with people age 14-25, their attitudes are much different than they were when I was growing up in terms of how accepting they are and their parents are. There are still teh hard eggs, but it is much different. In just the 7 years I have been doing it there has been a changes even.
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Gracie Faise

My parents did know. They just didn't say or do anything = _= Which lead me to believe they'd hate me, so I let it boil until I was 18. Biggest mistake of my life.
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Ashley315

I think mine did know, ever though they say they had no clue.  I don't see how they couldn't have known.  I didn't hide things much when I was under the age of 10.
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glendagladwitch

#37
I used to think it would have made a difference.  But then my sister told me my parents confessed to her that they had two sexual specification surgeries perfomed on me when I was 3 months old and 6 months old.  So all that business about not recalling the conversations we had when I was 4 and 5 years old about how I felt more like a girl or wanted be a girl, that was all rubbish too.  Parents can be very strange.  I haven't seen or spoken to mine in about 17 years.
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Carolyn

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Genevieve Swann

Maybe my mother did know and just ignored it. Father was hardly ever sober long enough to notice. Someone must have seen there was something different when G.I. Joe and Barbie kept crossdressing.