so where do i fall in?

[stezzie]

i was born a boy.
i know i'm a girl.
but i like girls more than boys.
i'll find myself looking at girls wishing i could be as beautiful.
by like i mean i can never see myself dating a guy, only girls.
i've had a girlfriend for the past four years and i know i love her.
does this make us lesbians? considering she knows how i feel about myself.

does this happen?

ps, she finds me staring at her while she does her make up and jokes,"you want some?"

[cindybc]

There are those of us who go though the complete physical transition and our sexual orientation may not change, like M to F continue to seek a relationship with a female. which basically makes you lesbian by your own choice. I am.

Cindy

[Cindy]

There are lots of MtF lesbians, don't worry.
And you haven't take up her offer as yet?

Hun take up her offer and, if you are in an intimate relationship, make love as lesbians. Share, touch, feel, be partners. Forget that thing between your legs.

Make sure she enjoys and yo do too.

Cindy James.

[stezzie]

would i be transgender or transexual? i'm so confused...

[cindybc]

I think that is something you will have to decide on on your own hon, but usually if you are driven by gender identity dysphoria to the point where you are willing to go to any lengths to be a girl/woman including surgery then it would be safe to say you are transsexual. Transgender usually the person is not as driven to complete the physical transition, to the point of doing the real life test and the surgery. Ok that will probably mean an attack upon myself by a herd of flyswatter weilders, but hey.

Cindy

[placeholdername]

would i be transgender or transexual? i'm so confused...

First, definitely let her do your make up.  Wish I had someone to do for me.. hehe.

Second, what you are is a person and you feel the way you do.  Transgender and Transexual are words we can use to describe ourselves, but it's not something you *are*, it's a lbel you choose or choose not to apply.  Best place to start finding out more is probably the wiki on this site.

[stezzie]

i should check out the wiki. maybe it'll give me some insight on what i am.

but then again, can't i just be me?

[placeholdername]

but then again, can't i just be me?

Exactly!

[cindybc]

S'arrrright!!!!

Cindy

[Genevieve Swann]

If it is merely an opinion you're looking for, yes you are a lesbian. They always good people unless of course the partner starts liking you too much. Maybe you could try just being bi and cover all bases. Avoid confusing yourself. Now I'm very curious. How many TG/TS persons retain the same sexual attractions? For me sex falls way down on the list or priorities. Friendship is very important and good friends are always female. I'd even prefer a feminine fishing partner.
Post Merge: March 15, 2009, 03:34:34 AM
One more thing. I allowed a GG friend to do my makeup one day and it was a dissaster. I looked like a cheap harlot. But that's OK, sometimes harlot is good. Depends on the mood.
Post Merge: March 15, 2009, 06:12:55 AM
Info from rainbow@bgsu.edu. Most TG people consider themselves heterosexual. Many are perceived as gay. Also, being transgendered is neither a choice nor a "lifestyle" and thus cannot be considered immoral. The intrinsic difference is gender identity not sexual identity. Therefore you must come out twice. One, I'm transgender. Two, I'm a lesbian. That's easy enough. Sounds like a great life.

[chrysalis]

would i be transgender or transexual? i'm so confused...

Don't worry about a label, it's hard but trust me fretting over it won't help. Look at your feelings with only honesty, and without fear and the truth become apparent.

FYI though, gender refers to your mental state, and sex refers to your physical state. TS, as I understand it, tends more toward having issues with their anatomy, whereas TG has issues with the social roles they are required to fill.

[Osiris]

Number one thing to remember, sexuality has nothing to do with your gender.

And I wouldn't be too worried about labels, everyone seems to have their own definition of what they mean. You can do a little research and see which one describes you better.

[Ashley315]

I wouldn't worry about the sexuality part to much.. Get the gender issues figured out first.  Worry about the sex later on.  Just my opinion. 

Good luck.

[stezzie]

Don't worry about a label, it's hard but trust me fretting over it won't help. Look at your feelings with only honesty, and without fear and the truth become apparent.

FYI though, gender refers to your mental state, and sex refers to your physical state. TS, as I understand it, tends more toward having issues with their anatomy, whereas TG has issues with the social roles they are required to fill.

so i guess i'm both TG and TS?
i'm not to happy with parts i was born with.
and i kinda wanna start dressing girly...

[Ashley315]

Just be a you... Don't worry about the labels.. To much gets thrown into labels to be honest.  I'm done with them myself.  Once again.. just my opinion.   If you feel you are and have always been a woman, then that is what you are.

[heatherrose]

...can't i just be me?

That is exactly the point, in all parts of your life.
Why try to stuff yourself into a box?
Boxes are stuffy, dark, ill-fitting and are
usually made by someone else.
Labels are more portable but
they cover part of your beauty.

[Sandy]

so i guess i'm both TG and TS?
i'm not to happy with parts i was born with.
and i kinda wanna start dressing girly...

The precise definition of transsexual is a person who is uncomfortable with their born gender and wish to change to the opposite gender.

Transgender is an umbrella term that covers transsexuals, ->-bleeped-<-s, gender queer, androgynous and others.

Given what you have described so far, you sound like you are transsexual.

And as has been stated in other posts, gender identity and sexual orientation are two different things.  Were you to transition from male to female, and if your attraction to women did not change, then you would be a lesbian.

Bottom line, though is not to worry too much about labels.  Follow your instinct.  And if your partner stays with you, that is really fantastic.

If you are serious about pursuing transition, the first thing you should do is get to a gender therapist who will help you understand where you are and what steps you should follow.

And yes, if your girlfriend offers to help you with your makeup, take her up on it.  You're going to need the practice!

Best of luck to you, Stezzie.  And welcome to Susan's!

-Sandy