I'd prefer people be upfront and honest with what they think of me, but I don't feel the need to know what everyone thinks of me. Like it's not that important to me, I'd just rather people not lie to me, sugarcoat or walk on eggshells around me to spare me my feelings. Cause I already know I don't look/appear/sound much like my gender, and sometimes that's even intentionally nowadays.
Like I know I'm a woman, but I do like being genderally ambiguous with my deep voice, facial hair that I trim into a neat "fashion stubble" and combine with lots of makeup, big boobs and feminine clothing that accentuates my curves. Most people are gonna be mistaken about my gender, unless they make no assumption at all and just ask me.
But most people just take a guess and are totally wrong about it. Because most people do tell me what they think, even if mostly in very indirect and hinty ways. Like for example, people who express that they think I'm either weird, gross or brave (instead of just "normal") for dressing feminine, is quite a hint.
So I already know, but I'm also already fine with it, that people have opinions and that my appearance gets attention. I choose to look this way because I like it and it feels like me, at the expense of not passing. It's not a big deal to me, as long as I get met with politeness and a basic level of respect. But it was difficult to become confident enough to not be too bothered by the frequent misgendering. It only gets to me when it involves harrassment, being dehumanised, being fetishised, etc (and of course any kind of violence but that hasn't happened yet, luckily).
But ultimately it doesn't matter if people think I'm a man or woman or nonbinary or whatever. Sometimes I correct people, other times I just let it slide. But I'd much rather they'd just be honest.
