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So what excatly is girly behavior?

Started by lostandconfused, March 21, 2009, 11:02:49 AM

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lostandconfused

What do you think qualifies as girly? I always thought it was sorta a childish/playful and cute sorta thing (anime schoolgirl?), but I've been acting like that as a guy and everyone at school seems to find it perfectly fine. I guess it works since I get along with girls quite well - my cousin has said "I like how we can have girl-talks with you... unlike my brother."
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Vicky

I hate that term "girly" in regard to what it means when used against "T's".  GG's do discuss feelings and emotions as part of their social interactions more readily than men do.  GM's talk and relate better on the "things" side of life than women do.  Part of the reason I fit the "T" line, is because I think in the emotional channel more than the thing channel. 

By "things" I am referring to public affairs issues, sports, jobs, outward signs of success or failure etc.  Its a deal where thoughts and opinions are used instead of feelings.

You evidently can listen to your female friends talk about how something makes them feel, and enjoy it in a way validates their feeling.  "That dress is dreamy" describes the girl's feeling of pleasure at the thought of owning it or wearing it.  You can feel that pleasure and relate to it.  Enjoy it.

I was a single parent for years, and I had "feelings" toward what my children were going through more than other dad's had.  (It was my underground "T" self that came to the front.)  I behaved worse as a parent when I tried to be "all man", as my kids (now grown) remind me.

GIRLY does not have to be a BAD thing.   
I refuse to have a war of wits with a half armed opponent!!

Wiser now about Post Op reality!!
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Kaelin

"Girly" is a subjective construct, but it pertains to activities and expressions that are clearly or excessively feminine or female-related.  My advice is to just sort of take any references to it or thoughts of it in stride and focus on being you.  I am happy that it is working for you at school and with your friends, so keep embracing it.
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tekla

What do you think qualifies as girly?

What girls do, which these day includes Secretary of State, construction work and surfing the Banzai Pipeline.  So pretty much everything that's not a) getting some chic preggers, or b) peeing out the window of car moving at 65 mph down the 101.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Ashley315

anything and everything.

Gender and gender roles are, thankfully, a dieing idea from the stone age.
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Saraloop

Stereotypes:

    * Women are more emotionally expressive.
    * Women are more emotionally responsive.
    * Women are more empathetic.
    * Women are more sensitive to others' feelings.
    * Women are more obsessed with having children.
    * Women express their feelings without constraint, except for the emotion of anger.
    * Women pay more attention to body language.
    * Women judge emotions from nonverbal communication better than men do.
    * Women express more love, fear, and sadness.
    * Women laugh, gaze, and smile more.
    * Women anticipate negative consequences for expressing anger and aggression.
    * Women tend to have more interest in Aesthetics of things.
    * Men are overwhelmed by women's expressions of emotion.
    * Men express more anger.
    * Men control their feelings.
    * Men restrain from expressing their feelings.
    * Men are stoic.
    * Men show emotion to communicate dominance.

Clothing:

    * In Western societies, skirts and dresses and high-heeled shoes are usually seen as women's clothing, while neckties are usually seen as men's clothing. Trousers were once seen as exclusively male clothing, but are nowadays worn by both sexes. Male clothes are often more practical (that is, they can function well under a wide variety of situations), but a wider range of clothing styles is available for females. Males are typically allowed to bare their chests in a greater variety of public places. It is generally acceptable for a woman to wear traditionally male clothing, while the converse is unusual.
    * In some cultures, sumptuary laws regulate what men and women are required to wear.
    * Islam requires both sexes to wear hijab, or modest clothing. What qualifies as "modest" varies in different Muslim societies; however, women are usually required to cover more of their bodies than men are. Articles of clothing worn by Muslim women for purposes of modesty range from the headscarf to the burqa.
    * Scottish men may choose to wear kilts on ceremonial occasions. Kilts were previously worn as normal clothing by men. Men not of Scottish descent are increasingly wearing kilts today.
    * Compared to men's clothing, women's clothing tends to address being looked at[Fashion]. In the modern West, women are more likely to wear makeup, jewelry, and colorful clothing, while in very traditional cultures women are protected from men's gazes by modest dress.

Also: In general, women are more involved than men with children. In general, men are more likely to be accused of pedophilia, which may lead them to avoid children.
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imaz

Quote from: Saraloop on March 26, 2009, 09:52:30 AM

    * Islam requires both sexes to wear hijab, or modest clothing. What qualifies as "modest" varies in different Muslim societies; however, women are usually required to cover more of their bodies than men are. Articles of clothing worn by Muslim women for purposes of modesty range from the headscarf to the burqa.


Hijab can in my understanding refer to a simple mental state, there are varying opinions as to to what it means and to whom it refers in the Quran.

In World's largest Muslim country, Indonesia, it is common practice in Java at least, for both the bride and other female attendees at a Muslim wedding not to cover their hair. At my own wedding neither my bride nor any female members of her family on her mother's side covered their hair except with traditional jasmine flowers.

Unlike elsewhere in the Muslim world it is not required for a woman to cover their hair within the perimeter of a Mosque if they are not actually praying. Of course in Aceh none of this is the case and fundamentalists would like to see a crackdown nationwide.
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FairyGirl

my gg friends all used to tell me I was very "girly" (which to them was a good thing), and were not at all surprised to find out I was tg. Now I am pretty much a "girly-girl" altogether. I do think women tend to express themselves more when it comes to feelings and emotions. I have heard that men tend to be more left-brained (analytical and stoic) and women more right-brained (artistic and emotionally expressive). I was just commenting the other day to a friend that it seems like most men act the way they do because in hetero male society it is absolute anathema to be seen in any way as acting "girly". In the end they are all only labels and don't really convey who a person truly is inside.
Girls rule, boys drool.
If I keep a green bough in my heart, then the singing bird will come.
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Yasuko

#8

Girly behavior is when your not trying to act like a drama queen...lol just be yourself, and i bet its girly~


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xsocialworker

Compare Rachel Maddow to Ana Marie Cox on the Rachel Maddow show and you will see what is and isn't girly. Sarah Palin presents as 'Girlie" and Hillary Clinton doesn't. Both sets of behaviors play to different bases.
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xsocialworker

I would say that Nancy Pelosi is somewhere in the middle. She talks "not girlie", but then has the stereotypical smile after making a tough statement.
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Saraloop

Quote from: Yasuko on April 04, 2009, 06:16:05 AM

Girly behavior is when your not trying to act like a drama queen...lol just be yourself, and i bet its girly~


http://yasuko14.webs.com/

I really like the pics you have there, Yasuko. Very cute.   ^-^
Your website takes an eternity to load :S
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Ashley315

Oh please, there is no such thing as girly behavior.  What Americans consider "girly" isn't what someone is India thinks is "girly" and vice versa.  All we have is an idea based on what our society thinks.  The thing is, all those thoughts and ideas are ever changing thankfully because if the idea of what was girly stayed the same as it was say in the 1920s, I'd be one mad woman.
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FairyGirl

Quote from: Ashley315 on April 04, 2009, 11:44:12 AM
Oh please, there is no such thing as girly behavior.  What Americans consider "girly" isn't what someone is India thinks is "girly" and vice versa.  All we have is an idea based on what our society thinks.  The thing is, all those thoughts and ideas are ever changing thankfully because if the idea of what was girly stayed the same as it was say in the 1920s, I'd be one mad woman.

is that mad as in angry, or mad as in wacko? lol  :laugh: I did take it to mean our current western definition, but I agree with what you said.  ;)
Girls rule, boys drool.
If I keep a green bough in my heart, then the singing bird will come.
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Ashley315

Quote from: FairyGirl on April 04, 2009, 12:06:47 PM
is that mad as in angry, or mad as in wacko? lol  :laugh: I did take it to mean our current western definition, but I agree with what you said.  ;)

Both actually.  :)  1920s women were expected to do whatever men told them to do..  That just isn't something I'd ever do.
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FairyGirl

I have to agree... unfortunately there are women out there to this day that subscribe to that line of thinking.
Girls rule, boys drool.
If I keep a green bough in my heart, then the singing bird will come.
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Jaimey

Quote from: lostandconfused on March 21, 2009, 11:02:49 AM
but I've been acting like that as a guy and everyone at school seems to find it perfectly fine.

It's all about comfort levels.  If you act in a 'girly' manner and everyone is fine with it, then it's because you're natural, comfortable, and confident.  You're just being yourself and that's awesome. 

And while I agree that 'girly' and 'boyish' are defined within our societies, I think that's probably a topic for another thread.  I think LAC was asking us for support, not debate.  :)
If curiosity really killed the cat, I'd already be dead. :laugh:

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." GWC
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heatherrose



Quote from: FairyGirl on April 04, 2009, 12:46:53 PM... unfortunately there are women out there to this day that subscribe to that line of thinking.

...and it really is starting to pease meoff!
I know of several women who allow themselves
to be abused physically and/or mentally.
Damit, pick up something really sharp or blunt
and make sure they will never do it to anyone again.
Just my humble opinion.

"I have always wanted to have a neighbor just like you,
I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you.

So let's make the most of this beautiful day,
Since we're together, we might as well say,
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?" - Fred Rogers
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Miniar

A couple of girls walked ahead of me on my way between classes when I was in school in Sweden.
They were complaining amongst themselves about how they were being forced by their parents to educate themselves. They would much rather just marry a good man to take care of them.
I was so shocked I stopped in my tracks and just stared at them while they walked away.



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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