First time on susans forum. I'm a 28 m, straight but with an open mind. I am generally attracted to extremely intelligent, creative and empathetic humans. I'm emotionally attracted to both sexes, but sexually attracted to lady parts. I'm at a point in my life where I'm considering potential partners qualifications as a long term mate. My preference is to be with a fertile GG as my life plan includes having and raising kids.
I recently began a relationship with a woman in her thirties who is quite wonderful in many regards, but I am unsure if she is genetically a woman. She is very physically active and describes herself as a tomboy. I am quite sure that she is either a woman with some fairly masculine features, or perhaps a post-op with a good plastic surgeon. I have only anecdotal evidence that this might be the case. For instance, her hip-to-waist ratio is decidedly masculine, her voice is feminine but with a little bass to it, and her favorite musical is "Hedwig and the angry inch" about a post-op glam rocker. What sticks out in my mind the most is when I am fingering her, and I stretch my fingers wide, her pelvic bone feels much narrower than any other women I have been with. I remember my first thought was "there's no way a baby could fit through there". Make a peace sign with your fingers, that's about how wide it is.
Mind you, I am coming from a place of caring for her. I am not transphobic. How would I go about determining if she is a born woman, without directly asking her? Are there any tell-tale signs? I worry about hurting her feelings either way she answers by directly questioning her gender. I suppose it is a sign of lack of trust that I can't just make nice dinner conversation - "so, what are your thoughts on vaginoplasty?" Help!
