The past week all hell's broken loose in my life- All the people I like at my job quit, and the store next to mine is closing, so I need to find a real job for the summer until I go back to school to upgrade so that my transcript doesn't look like crap, my mother threatened to cut me off financially which was more alarming than I thought it would be, my girlfriend's acting strangely and talks about breaking up sometimes, and my roommate wants to move out on me leaving me with a two bedroom apartment and nowhere affordable to go.
And now my desires to be female are stronger than ever. I'm wondering if it's stress, but mostly I'm wishing it would subside because there's not a whole lot I can do right now. I find myself often thinking that keeping my secrets would be easier if I didn't have any people in the equation who aren't "safe" or in other words capable of exposing me by trying to be too genuinely close to me in some way. I find myself thinking of my other half as a passenger who wants to be the driver, and I've gotta set aside time to let my passenger do what she wants. I, honestly, can't tell if I'm driven to turn things into a narrative, or if I'm a little off my nut.
