Anxiety before surgery

[taru]

Has anyone had anxiety issues before surgery? How did you deal with them?

I have two weeks till surgery and getting anxious. What if I am just totally crazy and delusional about everything?

I have faith in the surgeon and that the surgery will go fine, but I keep doubting myself. Being anxious over the surgery seems stupid, but still I am full of anxiety. Any tips for dealing with this?

[Sandy]

Anxiety is normal.  This is a serious thing you are entering into.

You didn't mention what surgery you were going in for, but, regardless, it is normal.

I dealt with it by trying to identify specifically what was making me anxious about the surgery.  By identifying my fears, I was able to control them.  Perhaps you can do something similar.

If you have a specific question or concern, perhaps you can discuss it with the doctor.  And of course, you can bring it here and I'm sure we can find someone with an opinion!   

[Nero]

Echoing Sandy, tell us what you're anxious about. I know I was nervous about the anesthesia and the actual cutting that was going to happen, but they put me out without my even knowing they were doing it, through an IV. I never even saw the operating room or gas mask. I woke up and it was all over. I felt like I missed something. But my chest sure hadn't. 

[taru]

SRS.

I'm kind of afraid of hospitals, blood and gore. I trust the doctors not to mess things up, but thinking about a messy wound just leaves me vomitting.

Then I keep doubting myself, which is weird since I never had much doubt about the process before. I keep thinking "what if I have been completely lunatic for the last 10 years and come to my senses after surgery" and other such scenarios.

[Sandy]

SRS.

I'm kind of afraid of hospitals, blood and gore. I trust the doctors not to mess things up, but thinking about a messy wound just leaves me vomitting.

Then I keep doubting myself, which is weird since I never had much doubt about the process before. I keep thinking "what if I have been completely lunatic for the last 10 years and come to my senses after surgery" and other such scenarios.

You won't see much blood and only on the dressings when they change them.  So just close your eyes.  And there will be no gore.  You will see the inside of the hospital, I'm afraid, they can't do this as a drive through, yet. 

As to the doubting yourself, try this:

Flip a coin.

Heads, you go ahead and have the SRS.

Tails, you don't.

Now, look at the coin.

How do you feel about the result?

It isn't leaving the decision up to chance, it's using a method to help identify your feelings.

Also, you cannot see tomorrow.  Anything can happen.  I think all of us who have walked this path have had these nagging doubts.  Christ!  We're taking our entire lives and turning them upside down!  Who wouldn't second guess this?

But many, if not most, who have been driven to this extreme feel that this is a life or death decision.

Also, if you have been through enough therapy to satisfy the WPATH requirements, you probably have a good grasp of your feelings and your needs.

It is a white knuckle ride, to be sure.  But one that almost everyone has said that it is the proper thing to do.

-Sandy

[ArleneTgirl]

Sandy, I just love your replies.  I was anxious before the first surgery I had some years ago (vasectomy/lol).  Have had a few procedures since then, and am looking forward to my Gender Confirming Surgery, although not scheduled yet.  Pre-surgery drugs are fun, lol. And, as I said, I totally agree with Sandy.

[Janet_Girl]

I have had two surgeries and both were nerve racking.  One was a bypass between the two arteries in the legs.  The other was when they went into my carotid artery to remove plaque.  Just knowing that they would make me feel better was all I focused on.

It is the same for SRS.  It will make me feel better about myself.

Janet

[Michelle.]

One word as far as 'script drugs go... Lexapro !!!

[Julie Marie]

You probably should determine the source of your anxiety.  If it's the fear of surgery you have little to fear, based on GRS history.  If you're afraid you'll regret having the surgery, it's time to do some serious soul searching because you can't undo GRS.

Before I had mine I had this gut feeling that I wasn't going to make it through the surgery.  It seemed silly but that's what my gut was telling me.  I've learned certain gut feelings should be taken seriously but I talked to people close to me and was reassured I'd be just fine. 

When the day came I had no worries about having the surgery.  And when I came to I felt no pain at all.  In fact, I went over nine hours before I asked for a pain med and that was only because I didn't want to wake up in the middle of the night in pain.  Most people sleep a lot after surgery.  I was up all day and didn't go to sleep until almost midnight.  The surgery was the easiest I've ever had.

Talk to your doctor and share your concerns.

Julie

[taru]

My therapist is saying that I shouldn't worry about the feelings and that everything will go fine.

He is also giving me benzos to deal with the anxiety but I don't take them unless things get bad. I'm having the surgery in Thailand and my spoken english is quite bad, so not much communication possible there.

I think the anxiety may be related to "icky large wound". Since I didn't have any such doubts before hrt or vocal chord surgery.

[Witch of Hope]

1994 I had it, and I was scared about it. My blood pressure went high (240/120) and I come to as hospital, a week before my surgery. It was the "final cut" and my fear what would be next to me.
Well, my surgery was past away, I'm still alive and happy. Look at your inner demon. Maybe you're not ready for it, maybe you make to much fear about your future, maybe...
The answer is in you.

[pretty pauline]

Lexshue your therapist is right and everything will go fine, srs is so much better these days, I had mine in 1985, I remember the days leading up to my surgery I had a lot of anxiety, then to add to the pressure my parents where very anxious that I had srs to complete my transition.
But when my big day came, it seemed over very quick, I remember going under, then coming around, seemed only minutes asleep, but of course hours had passed, felt pain and the packing down below, my Dad was there, all I remember saying ''am I done'' he just hugged me and replyed ''Daddy's princess girl is now complete'' it was all over, my throat was sore from the trach shave, the lead up was stressful, but then it was all over with, I slept a good bit, the nurses who where the best, use to call me ''the sleepy girl'' lol
My throat healed fine, got rid of my dreadful adam's apple, the nurse just said ''be a good girl and don't speak'' nurses never get credit, all worth the effort, because  I love being a woman after all these years.
p

[Mister]

Lex, I would be more worried if you weren't anxious.  it's totally normal.

[Audrey]

my doc gave me hydroxyzine, which is actually a pill for allergies to so i guess it works out as I have bad allergies in the spring/summer and it helps calm me so I can make it through the flight.

[DarkLady]

My anxiety before surgery was relating to possibility of not getting the surgery. However dilations cause me anxiety when I have to start doing them.

[gothique11]

They gave me ativan.