Leigh Ann Sparks

[Melissa]

Leigh was a person I thought about often.  She helped me so much with transition that a lot of her information and/or her opinions were thought about.  We had met in a coffee shop several times and had the most wonderful chats that lasted for hours.  She gave me one of the books I used for coming out at work.  On one of the last occasions I had to see her, I brought along my daughter, so Leigh got a chance to meet her.  I felt like I was a her little sister. *Pauses to wipe tears away* We always got along.  I think we liked each other because neither of us liked dealing with BS and fluffing up stuff.  We hugged after each of our meetings and she told me she could see I'll do well as a woman.  I will miss her dearly.

Melissa

[Mario]

Leigh. I had breif incounters with her when I first came here. I would PM her, and she would get right back to be. That I appreciated since at the time I myself was looking for so many answers still. I have to admit I steered clear of her after reading some of her posts, seeing just how maybe sometimes she was overly blunt, but you know what? That was Leigh, and that is why I respected her and really was hoping to met her in Portland, so I would have been able to see for myself there was a softer side to her. Rest In Peace Leigh.

                                            Marco

[stephanie_craxford]

I think that I have recovered enough from the shock of Leigh's passing to comment.  I have to say that I went to pieces when I received the email from Cyd, Leigh's leather dad, telling me of Leigh's passing, I had just been chatting with her last week.

How do you comment on a person such as Leigh...  I've know Leigh for quite a while now and like many here I looked to her as my big sister.  We spent many an hour chatting, sorting out the worlds problems passing advice back and forth, although the advice often passed was from Leigh to me.

We spoke in depth on her battle with cancer and she honestly thought that she had it licked, but then she went so fast.  She was a breath of fresh air, there was no BS from her or about her, she said what she meant and meant what she said, and I truly admired her for that.  I guess I would like to think that we were kindred spirits and we often joked about the spirit world, we poked fun at many things as she did have a very subtle sense of humor.

I'll miss her greeting to me on IM when she buzzed me to chat - "hey girly girl, want a cookie".  And I would always joke with her that I'm coming down to visit her and let her take me to the bars as her date, and how heads would turn when they saw her hanging with me.  But you know it wouldn't have phased her one bit, cause that was the type of woman she was.  , We had begun to plan getting together in January sometime, after my surgery in Dec, so we could "compare results" (her words) .

People often thought that she was an opinionated, strong willed, rough around the edges type of girl, but to me she will always be my "nut bar", one of the sweetest women I have known, a friend and soul mate, my chocolate chip cookie.

Steph

[umop ap!sdn]

Oh no!!!!
Posted on: 2006-September-11, 11:46:23 AM

I'll miss her greeting to me on IM when she buzzed me to chat - "hey girly girl, want a cookie".

Heh, that's good! I'm really sorry now that I didn't get to know her better.

All that time I was waiting for her to get back to me when I asked about the dark side icon and I never even realized that she was battling terminal illness.

[Melissa]

Yeah, I believe it was throat cancer if I remember correctly what she told me.

Melissa

[stephanie_craxford]

Yeah, I believe it was throat cancer if I remember correctly what she told me.

Melissa

It started out as cancer of the lymph nodes, and after the operation and many chemo treatments they though that they had it all and that she was in remission but cancer is one tough nut to beat.

Steph

[Melissa]

Ok, according to the Wikipedia:

The term throat cancer is sometimes used as a layman's term for a cancer of the larynx or pharynx, a cancer that has metastasized to the lymph nodes of the neck, or even esophageal cancer.

So I guess I was right, but in a general sort of way.  Thanks for the specifics Steph.

Melissa

[Jessica]

Rest In Peace Leigh.

May Flights of Angels Sing Thee to Thy Rest.

Jessica.

[Chaunte]

Dear, Lord...  I had no idea about the battle she fought.

I know, deep inside, that her spirit is reading what we are saying.  So excuse me for writing present tense.

Leigh, I have not always agreed with you, but I have always respected  and listened to what you had to say.  When you spoke, I tried to hear the meaning behind your words, not just the words themselves.

I have met a lot of tough, determined people in my life - several of them here at Susan's - but never anyone tougher and more determined.  I know that you met death with your eyes wide open.

Rest in peace here, Leigh.  I know that you are already creating a ruckus and whipping everyone into shape in the next life.

Qa'pla!

Chaunte

[molly]

I am saddened to hear of Leigh's passing.  My memory will be of a strong willed woman who spoke her mind and I admired her for it.  Leigh lives in each of us in some manner I believe.

I'm reminded of a poem by T.S. Eliot, "Getting older, you refuse to fritter away your time on nonsense, you drop your masks, your little vanities and false ambitions."  This poem reminds me of Leigh.

Maya

[Bdnewgirl]

It is a great loss that can never be filled. I will truly miss Leigh. It also makes me more sad to learn  that we had a lot of things in commend. I just wish we would have had a chance to meet in person.

Brandi

[nonie]

AH!  I wondered where all her posts were too!  I'm new here, but I thought she was hilarious and had that confidence and openness that always kinda makes me feel a bit reverential, like "That's the way to be"...  She reminded me a lot of someone I knew in person who died a couple years ago, also of widespread cancer.

*sigh* People always go before you realize how much you will miss them when they do.  I barely knew her but I will definitely miss her posts.

[Susan]

A friend of hers logged into the forum and deleted her account. they may have also deleted her posts. I do not know.

[Brianna]

I must admit - I never knew Leigh. So I won't pretend to have any special insight into her life.

The think that strikes me about her story is that she lived 60 years, with all but two of them in the correct gender. And to me, that is very sad.

Let this be a lesson to all of us. Tommorow, you could be hit by a bus, or get cancer, or any number of things. Would you look back and say that you had wanted to live? Would you consider your life a success?

Or fears limit us so, and yet they are such a fickle thing.

Bree

[Kate]

Let this be a lesson to all of us. Tommorow, you could be hit by a bus, or get cancer, or any number of things. Would you look back and say that you had wanted to live? Would you consider your life a success?

Or fears limit us so, and yet they are such a fickle thing.

So very, VERY true.

Leigh's "never apologize" attitude and unwavering integrity keep reminding me of "Valerie's Note" from the movie "V for Vendetta":

It seems strange that my life should end in such a terrible place, but for three years I had roses, and apologized to no one.

I'd only told them the truth. Was that so selfish? Our integrity sells for so little, but it's all that we really have. It is the very last inch of us, but within that inch, we are free.

I shall die here. Every last inch of me shall perish. Except one. An inch. It's small and it's fragile and it's the only thing in the world worth having. We must never lose it, or sell it, or give it away. We must never let them take it from us.

What I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that though I do not know you and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you... I love you.

[Melissa]

Kate, you seem to always post profound things like this at just the right times.

Melissa

[unicorn]

I'm shocked. I haven't been around for a long time and had no idea what was going on, no idea that Leigh passed away.

Though I didn't talk to her much, I will miss her and her attitude. Her name still figures on my yahoo friends list, also already silent for a long time...

but the mere presence of Leigh, her uncompromising realness ...the kind of thing I would look to and draw courage from whenever society tries to push me into compromise of whatever sort.

People like Leigh challenge and therefore change the world, simply by being in it.

even the notice of her passing seems to raise the bar for me... to stay in touch better than I have with people who matter to me in whatever way, here and irl.

Leigh, rest in peace.

should I write that? one of her fav lines was 'no rest for the wicked', and I bet she's causing a riot up there!


Alex

PS: Thanks to Susan for the reference to the newspaper article.

[Nero]

i am so sorry for her friends and family
i didnt know her well
but her posts often made laugh
rest in peace leigh

[stephanie_craxford]

Though I didn't talk to her much, I will miss her and her attitude. Her name still figures on my yahoo friends list, also already silent for a long time...

I know what you mean Alex.  Her name is still listed in my Yahoo, and other IM's, I just don't want to delete it.  I was staring at her name yesterday and for some reason I double clicked on it.  A window popped open and I "buzzed" her with "I miss you hon" half expecting that I would get a reply, but...  I don't know why I did it really, silly I know but she was special to me.

Silly humans

Steph

[Melissa]

Yeah, I still had her name in my yahoo list as well.  I just removed it.  I felt it was a way of letting her go, because she was a wild horse and she was never meant to be captured.  I will always hold her in my heart and it will be a while before I find the strength to remove her from my phone as well.

Melissa