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How Do I Tell My Friends That I...

Started by Juggalo, December 28, 2006, 04:58:25 PM

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Juggalo

How do I tell my friends that I am a Crossdresser? I am 22 and have been CD'ing for as long as I remember, but it has always been a secret. I have decided recently that I would prefer to be a little more open, at least around the people that care about me. I am currently living with my best friend of 10 years and his girlfriend. They are both very open minded and I am sure they would understand. I just don't know how to get the words out of my mouth. Or am I afraid of what might happen after I tell them? I don't really know, but I would appreciate some advise. And Thank You.
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beckster

Hi Juggalo and welcome !!

Telling other people for the first time is always a tough one.  When I decided I wanted to start talking to people about how I felt I picked the two people I thought would be okay, two friends who were husband and wife.  It sounds like you have a similiar sort of option with the friends you have mentioned.  Best thing I can suggest is probably what worked for me ...

Arrange a time to talk to them, keep in mind that this isn't something you want to rush, there might be questions from them so try and pick a quiet time when you are all free for a while and make it in a location you are comfy with !!  I understand about it feeling difficult to get the words out - there is always the fear of what might happen after you tell them.  Try and focus on the postive side of things, explain you value them both as friends and that you have something you would like to tell them that you hope will not effect the relationship you have with them.  Ask them to just take a moment to listen to what you are going to say, to think about it and by all means ask questions if they want to do so.  Take it slowly, be honest and just be yourself.  Spend a little time before hand just thinking through the wording you will use.  They might have concerns about this impacting on their own lives, you might also need to be ready to educate them both about what crossdressing is.  I hate labelling people but in my own personal experiences friends/family often aren't sure of the differences between crossdressers/transvestites/transsexuals and if this means you are gay ?  So be ready to talk them through where you fit in with things.  Try and put yourself in their shoes and think what you would want to know or what concerns you would have if they were telling you ?

Having the courage to decide you want to tell people is a huge thing, actually telling them is something else but you just need to tap in to that same courage you already have !!  Yes, people can sometimes take things badly, you would be suprised at how open minded people can be though and to what they may already think/know about you.  Both the friends I mentioned thought I was going to tell them I was gay !!  I had been single for ages and had kinda resisted attempts from them to hook me up with girls they knew.  When I explained my feelings to them though it was as if I was just giving them the missing piece to a jigsaw puzzle as they kinda knew that there was something wrong in my life.

Dont rush in to it though hon, take a little while and see what other replies you get. There are so many people on here who can give you advice, non of it is right or wrong, you just need to find what works best for you.

And good luck with it, you will be fine !!

Becky
xx
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