A question in general....

[sheila18]

 
  My question is to all of you..."Have you ever recalled a previously repressed traumatic experience in your past because of something that you have read here and if so did it scare you to the point that you considered backing away from this site?".  Don't get me wrong ...I totally believe in this site and the good it does and I am proud to be a part of it but right now I'm wondering if it's the best thing for me.

BrandiOK
The best thing 4 you is to CHOOSE on your own. That is where your power and self healing come. This I know cold and hot. Please forgive me if the statement sounds too self assured.
Yes I have recalled a traumatic experience while reading one of the posts and felt like backing away .  I felt disappointed, the disappointment part was not that I recalled the experience but that the responses and way of thinking of the members I was reading did not relate to me ( concerning that traumatic incident) other than the fact that we are trans gendered.
As loving as some of the members here at Susan's are still my mind seeks a degree of identification in opinions that is not realistically possible (I think is part of the disassociative factor or survival mechanism of any Post-traumatic stress disorder PTSD)
  Helping others or the sense that I can assist with any of  that helped me invaluably, I stayed so far because it felt important to help my sisters and brothers and when done that paradoxically helps me.
sheila18   love no matter what.

[Rana]

There are a lot of posts that I read that affect me in all sorts of ways, but which I dont respond to.  Often I don't know what to say, or dont think that I can put my feelings into words properly.  Or, even it could be a subject that worries or distresses, and I dont know how to respond.

Brandi don't feel bad if you don't get replies - is not that people are not listening or not caring.   Sadly I am not gifted as others here are.  I do feel for you however, and hope things go well for you

Love
Rana

[BrandiOK]

Thanks everybody  

  Day 2 on the anxiety meds:  Woke up and despite the normal back pain and gorilla breath I actually smiled.
Seems like a pretty minor thing but trust me....thats a huge deal for me LOL.  I'm sitting here enjoying my coffee (even though I'm not supposed to be drinking coffee until everything is back to normal).  The way I figure it NOT drinking my morning coffee would cause me to stress heh heh.  Not sure what else to say....I feel pretty good right now.  Not sure if it's the medicine or me just thinking its the medicine but either way I'll take it.

[Kim]

Glad to hear you're bouncing back Brandi. We're still praying for you and hoping you'll be back to yourself in no time. Hold in there girl, this is just a speedbump, you'll pass over it slowly but it'll be behind you before you know it. 

[Buffy]

Thanks everybody  

  Day 2 on the anxiety meds:  Woke up and despite the normal back pain and gorilla breath I actually smiled.
Seems like a pretty minor thing but trust me....thats a huge deal for me LOL.  I'm sitting here enjoying my coffee (even though I'm not supposed to be drinking coffee until everything is back to normal).  The way I figure it NOT drinking my morning coffee would cause me to stress heh heh.  Not sure what else to say....I feel pretty good right now.  Not sure if it's the medicine or me just thinking its the medicine but either way I'll take it.

You have a cute smile...lets see more of it.

Becky

[TheBattler]

Brandi,

I am glad you are felling better. I can so relate to your storing as I am now on anti-depressents and will be on them for a while and I have a friend who was recently diagnosed with a heart condidtion and now (at 25) has a nice pace maker to ensure she stays alive.  So pills and the heart is somehting I can relate to.

Alice

[Julie_in_MT]

Brandi,

First off I wish to convey my sadness over you possibly leaving. This is purely a selfish reaction because I do find your posts both intreaging and thoughtful.
I do sometimes feel a bit of aprehension of sorts when I see a post that hit's a little too close to home.
I do understand your feelings of trebedation but please stay, I would miss you alot!!

Julie

[BrandiOK]

I'm staying Julie, thanks.

  It's a tough thing to deal with I believe.  When you see a post of someone who is suffering through something that you yourself suffered with and survived you want to help.  You help by sharing your story which, ultimately, can lead to you having to live through your own pain again.

  I think however, that if we go into the situations anticipating some emotional repurcussions than we will be better prepared.  I didn't do that.....I thought that I was over something, when in fact, I was just past it.  It came back and bit me because I wasn't prepared.  I will be from now on though.  It's either that or not read/answer posts and that's not an option.  We are here to share and support and support by sharing.  I'll be much better prepared next time.

[Jillieann Rose]

Oh Brandi I just found this posting.
I'm so sorry for your anxiety attack.
It sounds so dreadful. And I am glad that you are doing better now.
I think we need to encourage each other to post more good news and funny stories.
That is what often helps me to keep going even when thinks get rough.
Jillieann

[veronica06]

I am not going to start listing my own meds here............


but I give brandi 2 thumbs up.............

and anyone else strong enough to find help and help themselves.
those whom are not able to...........I give you my full support here...speak up so we can talk.

[sheila18]

BrandiOK:
you are correct in tht is the function of a community to share and speak up.
  It takes courage to do so just like you have demonstrated. 

  Also another function of the members of the community is to listen and try most suitable advice.  Problems occur when someone takes it personally when the advice they gave is not taken or when they take it personaly when the advice they receive is perceive as an insult or admonition.


  We al grow byTHIS PROCESS also WE GROW STRONGER EACH OF US.

Please do not be discouraged by anmyone's words especially mine 

We belong to a segment of society that has been marginalized and therefore we are constantly devising ways to survive, this reinforces habits centered aound ourselves, just my opinion,  adn makes us hyper vigilant and more sensitive that we otherwise would be.

Again post away girl!   we lve the drama  just kidding!!   
we love to be part of this new sisterhood that fills a whole that for so  long has gone empty.   Not that!  get your mind out of the gutter! 

  BrandiOK you are ereally cool
sheila19