“They Could Smell the Girl On Me”

[Shana A]

"They Could Smell the Girl On Me"
Posted by catkisser on August 12, 2009

http://cathrynp.wordpress.com/2009/08/12/they-could-smell-the-girl-on-me/

One of the ways women like me are dismissed is "socialization" as males rather than females.  The response to this is often to deny any participation in male privilege as a child.  That's nonsense but the truth is a little harder to put your finger on.

My childhood was during the fifties and sixties, a time long before a kid unaccounted for more than 24 hours found their picture on a milk carton.....if you were male, or considered male.  I've addressed elsewhere exactly how rigid the gender roles were during this time, if you didn't grow up during this period of history, you'd be shocked.  But while I would not deny I benefited from the greater freedom granted males during my childhood, it's far from a complete picture on the other hand.  With that greater freedom came all the problems of not fitting in with boys and the costs of that.

[sd]

Really a good read.
I could not agree more with the author, just because we were raised in that role doesn't mean we benefited from it or that it was easy.

[MaggieB]

I liked the piece very much. I was raised back east during that time and had experiences almost the same. I too felt that my life was in danger most of the time.  I would run home from school to avoid being beaten up.  I think there is something to the title.  They could smell the girl on me.   I wrote lots of these events down in my unpublished autobiography and also in my book, Dorothy's Boy.  I am amazed that I managed to survive those days.

Maggie

[Janet_Girl]

Very good piece.  I was never sent away to be "made a man".  Dad was more underground in his approach,  comments here about people,  remarks there about a story about gays.  And then there was the whole pushing me toward male oriented activities. Sports, shop.  Things like that.

I have often wondered if they, my parents, saw some thing in me.  Mom would take me under her wing and teach me as if I were her daughter.  But she always use the phrase, "Boys need to know these things too".


Janet

[transheretic]

My reception here was pretty underwhelming in the past.....but I am glad some of you found something of merit in this piece.

[Shana A]

My reception here was pretty underwhelming in the past.....but I am glad some of you found something of merit in this piece.

What you wrote resonates for many of us! My own experience of growing up gender variant was quite different from that of the males who thought it reasonable to harass me due to not being one of them or like them. There was no hiding who I was, even though I didn't have a word for it as a child.

Z