Knocked back down again

[MRH]

So over the past few days ive been really thinking about taking things a step further. I have always worn males clothing and it doesnt really help me to look like a male. Sometimes it does but i've noticed that people think i'm a lot younger. They usually guess that i'm about 15 which really annoys me. I was thinking about getting the hair cut. I think it could help but im not binding yet and my voice is still quite high. I have passed with my voice sometimes. I remember when I would answer the phone and it was my mums boss she would always say to my mum "I've just spoken with your son" lol.

Im slowly getting the courage to break the news to my mum but the other day I was knocked back on the snakes and ladders board of coming out (Did you like my metaphor? Coz I know I didnt lol)
My mums best friend and daughter came over the other night and all was well when my mums friend told us about this boy who is getting a sex change who lives near my old house and how he/she was gonna be in the daily mirror. Both of them couldnt help but giggle over the situation and when we saw pictures of her they proceeded to laugh further. I tried to stick up for her saying how brave she was for wearing make up at school (especially with the school she went to) but they kinda just seemed to ignore me. And I could feel myself getting a little annoyed when they kept calling him "him" instead of "her". He had gone through the whole hormone treatment and everything yet they stilled viewed her as male. I know things are different when its happening to you or your family but I get the sense that behind closed doors my mum and her friend are gonna laugh at me and theyre the people to gossip to others. Also I fear that if everything works out and I go ahead with my plans that even when i've got muscles, a beard and a deep voice i'll still be a she to them.

[Rosa]

It is easier to laugh at others, but when it involves your own child, attitudes sometimes change.  When I was a kid I remember watching the evening news with my dad when a report about a gay pride parade came on.  The news only featured footage of a couple guys in pink tootoos wearing dog collars and my dad's remark was that "they should all be shot."  Suffice to say, that left a lasting impression on me and I didn't tell my dad about my sexual orientation for a couple decades.  Now we don't have a close relationship and the list of things we can't talk about is long, but he never shot me!

Something else.  It is easier to make fun of people when you are in a group that is making fun of them together.  You might try asking your mom privately if she really thought it was that bad, or if maybe she had some sympathy for that kid.  That might be a way to feel out her true feelings.

Best wishes, and don't be discouraged 

[spacial]

Have to agree. Two mates, having a giggle over someone else's problems.

Wait till her friend leaves then try telling her.

[confused]

It is easier to make fun of people when you are in a group that is making fun of them together.  You might try asking your mom privately if she really thought it was that bad, or if maybe she had some sympathy for that kid.  That might be a way to feel out her true feelings.

So true . i don't think that she'd laugh at you , most likely that she would be worried about that friend laughing at you . i'm not the one to speak about courage , but , if you believe in something , it will give you power to proceed because..well..you need power as the way to anything we want is never easy nor free of people laughing at you, mistreating you ,etc
transition depends alot on one's financial state and/or independence . so i say this incident is a good thing , because now you can know what your mother think about transition before actually coming out to her , then whatever she thinks don't let that discourage you , it might just change the way you would come out . but sooner or later you would have to come out imho

[Sarah_aus]

Hi MRH,

I have to agree with Spacial and Robertina on this one, though, I don't speak from experience.
Also, to Hijack, Robertina, my Dad said the same thing, still does on a regular basis, which has left a lasting impression on me and is most of the reason I said nothing growing up, your comment gives me some hope

Hugs,

Tali