name change or not?

[Al James]

ok so i have something i'm a bit unsure about. my partner knows what name i want to be called by as does my son. now, do i tell anyone else that i'm changing my name. haven't had my 1st assessment yet so might possibly get turned down for everything so do i wait or change my name anyway after all it could be a female name it just might raise some questions at work

[fluffy jorgen]

Firstly, do they actually call you by this name or do they just know you want to be called that?

[Al James]

sometimes my partner calls me it my son cant decide whether to carry on calling me mum alex or dad

[fluffy jorgen]

Well, if Alex is what you want to be called, then you should go ahead anyway.

However, I think, you need a substancial amount of proof and reason why and how long you've been called by this name.
Also, it might depend on where you live.

[FairyGirl]

Legally changing your name is a pretty big step, most people don't do that until they are ready to come out and live full time in their proper gender role. There's nothing that says you can't start using "Alex" as your nickname though, and get everyone used to referring to you by that name, including yourself. It varies state to state or if you live outside the US, but where I am there was no proof required at all. For the "reason" on the name change form I simply put "common usage" since everyone already called me Chloe anyways.

Alex is one of those names that could be either gender- I knew a girl in high school whose name was Alexandra but she went by Alex to everyone, including her teachers. If you like the name there's no reason you can't start using it now, unofficially. Later if you decide it's what you want you can get it legally changed then.

[Al James]

thank you all. my partner is worried that if i change my name now then it will prejudice the psychiatrist against me. think she's also worried that if i'm being called two different names i'm going to come across as scyzo

[Flameboy]

thank you all. my partner is worried that if i change my name now then it will prejudice the psychiatrist against me. think she's also worried that if i'm being called two different names i'm going to come across as scyzo

I'd have thought that if you change your name now it'll demonstrate to the psych that you're serious about transitioning rather than prejudicing them against you. And as for people thinking you're schizophrenic, plenty of people use different names in different situations - it's just like having a nickname really.

[myles]

I told my kids when I was about to start T and had the funds for Top surgery in the bank, so I was totally committed. They  had a hard  time remembering when they were allowed to call me dad or Myles and when they were suppose to call me Mom. Parents on the playground at the school were a little confused. So I then  told everyone else a few weeks later. I have to agree with flameboy on the psy thinking it's a positive step. Shows you are serious about transitioning.
Cheers,
Myles

[Janet_Girl]

I had changed my name just prior to going full time.  Only a few knew me by it, most it was still the old male name.  But my D/L was changed to reflex the new name.

If you are getting close to full time, go for it.  Otherwise you may wish to wait.


Janet

[sneakersjay]

I waited until I started T and was about to come out at work.  I wanted to change the gender marker and my name on my DL at the same time, and that way I was legal at work.  I did the name change and gender marker at SS after top surgery.

So, it depends.

I didn't ask anyone to call me by my new name until it was legal and I was out everywhere.


Jay

[jesse]

i have an androginist name anyway so i just changed the spelling to and applied the more formal one as well jesse=jessie=jessica lol

[Radar]

thank you all. my partner is worried that if i change my name now then it will prejudice the psychiatrist against me. think she's also worried that if i'm being called two different names i'm going to come across as scyzo

I don't think you should legally change your name for awhile. Start using your preferred name and make sure you really like it. Don't worry about what the psychiatrist thinks. You can be dead serious about transitioning whether your name is legally changed or not. A psychiatrist who doesn't take a transperson seriously because they haven't legally changed their name is a bad doctor anyway. Most likely he'll ask if you prefer to go by another name besides your birth name (especially if it's very feminine).