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How do I explain this?

Started by Brier, October 03, 2009, 05:48:30 PM

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Brier

   
Ok, I'm out as transgender at my school and just about everyone knows except the teachers. One day the substitute teacher asked me for my name with a 'sir' since I missed role call. Before I could say anything one of my best friends said "um, that's a girl" and the whole class started laughing. I told the teacher I was in fact a guy and my friend continued to insist that I'm not a guy until I get surgery. I wasn't even planning on going any farther than T anyway. After that everyone started referring to me as female again and if corrected they make the same point my friend did. How do I explain that gender Is not just about what's between your legs, and that referring to me as female on purpose really hurts my feelings. Or should I just back off and keep to myself for a while. (keep in mind these aren't the most mature 14-16 year olds)
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Dennis

I often find that the less explaining you do in life, the better things go. I assert my position and if people don't agree, shrug and move on. That'll get em thinking more than explaining does. Explaining sounds like making excuses more often than not.

Also usually, when it comes to matters of this nature, people just aren't gonna get it unless they're trying. So, unless you really need them to get it, say "I'm a guy". If they contradict you, look at 'em like they're crazy, shrug, and leave it at that.

Dennis
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Alex_C

Plus, starting in young, the T will deepen your voice, make your muscles grow, etc etc you'll smell like a guy and so on, and the hard part will be anyone believing you were anything but a guy. Just give it a couple of years.
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Kevin

Quote from: Brier on October 03, 2009, 05:48:30 PM
   
Before I could say anything one of my best friends said "um, that's a girl" and the whole class started laughing. I told the teacher I was in fact a guy and my friend continued to insist that I'm not a guy until I get surgery.

I'm sorry that happened, it's ridiculous, and I'm not sure what advice to give other than I'm not sure if someone doing this kind of stuff would fall into a 'best friend' category for most people.
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tekla

I'm down with Dennis on this one.  Explaining stuff just makes people think of other arguments.  Just let it stand - it is what it is.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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V M

I'd have to go with Dennis on this one also.

You know who you are. You don't need to explain it all to someone else's kid.
Just be yourself and don't worry on it. Like a guy would  ;)

Alex made some good comments also IMO
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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Cindy

I'm another with Dennis et al. You are never going to 'win' a class room discussion like this with 14-16 yr olds. It's too much for so many young minds to take in, they will end up egging each other on. You be the mature one and move on. Time is on your sude. And so are the teachers BTW.

Cindy
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