Pulling the Plug

[Shana A]

A reminder, no personal attacks please! Everyone's lives and experiences are different, people transition when it is right for them to do it, not before.

Z

[Flan]

as i see it, it comes down to attitude

"us" vs "them"
"young" vs "old"
"male" vs "female"
"beauty" vs "beast"

Walton Simons: You take another step forward and here I am again, like your own reflection in a hall of mirrors.
JC Denton: That makes me one ugly son of a bitch.

some just get it when it comes to managing their lives, others don't, some cope better pre-transition, others aren't. in the end it isn't when it (transition) happened, when it ends and how, or why, but the integration of mind, body and spirit into harmony

JC Denton: We... are... one.

before i thought of it like a path everyone took which was similar but unique to each person, but now i think of transition as more like navigating ones way through an unfamiliar city. many make it to their destination, some don't and get lost and either loop around until they get guidance, return back where they came from, or crash.

not being able to go forwards sucks, but the only "car" i can "drive" is my own, i may sigh at the thought of turning back, but i have to wish you (Maddie Suzumiya) good luck to wherever life takes you

[K8]

This:

in the end it isn't when it (transition) happened, when it ends and how, or why, but the integration of mind, body and spirit into harmony

Maddie,

I'm sorry if I hijacked your thread.  This is a difficult road to walk, and it is a different road for each of us.  I too often have needed reassurance from others to get over doubts and problems. 

I hope that you find what you need to become the person you need to be – whoever that person may be.

*hugs, Maddie*
Kate

[Maddie Secutura]

Its alright and apparently I'm just not photogenic.  Apparently the closeness to my face combined with the crappy quality of the camera phone causes parallax error and makes everything out of proportion. 

I'm feeling a lot better about transition and have full confidence that given enough time I can assimilate fully. 

[jesse]

From what I can tell assimiliation doesn't happen.  There is a big difference between passing, and assimilation.  From what I can tell is most older women are seen as trans women, but never natal women.  This is what assimilation is, being seen as natal. 

These are the questions you should ask...are they seeing a woman or a trans woman.  With older trans women, they always see the trans woman.  I don't get that. 

How often do people ask you about your relationships...about marrying a guy, having kids.  How often can you speak about your past, and not lie, and still have it seem like you have always been a woman.  I can do that, can you?  That is what assimilation is about.  Its not having much baggage from ones past.  Which means no marriage, no kids before transition, and a visual appearance that is consistently female...without makeup.  It means working in a profession and having a resume that does not deviate much from the norm for women.  This means no overtly masculine professions.  It means to blend in completely. 

How good is your voice?    Most older trans women I have met its horrid.  I offer you something else.  Older trans women don't assimilate, they are humored, but still seen as trans, not natal women.

If you want to be seen as a trans women that is fine.  Just please don't consider it the same as the assimilation that those of us who transitioned younger experience.

I can't relate to older trans women for a reason.  The way I live my life is very very different, my past is very different.  I didn't make the stupid mistakes older trans women did.

[Tyler]

Maddie, Girl you look great! All I would suggest is laser! 
Janet, you look awesome! I hope my transition to treat me well as it has to you 

[Alex_C]

Maddie I just see a GIRL ..... with 5 o'clock shadow for some strange reason.

More time on hormones and yeah I guess it's some kind of electrolysis for the el-beardo, and you should be set.

All aboard the cute train to Cuteville!

[Maddie Secutura]

The strange thing is that I had just pulled out all the hairs on my face which are already sparse due to the laser I've had done (6 treatments).  Under normal lighting conditions there isn't any shadow (well maybe a bit on my upper lip where the skin itself seems to be a shade darker).  I think it's due to the bad lighting where I took the picture since my entire neck seems to have the same shadow color.  OK, I'm through with excuses. 

[Teena89]

gurl i knw wat u mean maybe get some hair extensions and more make up! no offense or anything! ur face isn't obvious ur pretty lucky!

Teena