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I want to confess but I don't know what to write

Started by Matthew J. F, October 06, 2009, 03:09:53 AM

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Matthew J. F

I'm desperately wanting to confess to my father about me being a FTM and that I want to take hormonal treatment and possible surgery in the future (to see if I am who I am). I don't know what to say. Theirs so many things that I want to tell him but I can't seem to put together a good single sentence that is understandable. I don't want to make it too emotional, other wise he will view it as me being overly emotional.
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Silver

One sentence?

"I'm a transsexual and want to start treatment."

Quite understandable.

SilverFang
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Asfsd4214

Quote from: SilverFang on October 06, 2009, 03:56:44 AM
One sentence?

"I'm a transsexual and want to start treatment."

Quite understandable.

SilverFang

God I wish it were that easy.

My coming out to my mum was borderline hilarious. I literally couldn't get the words out, it took hours for her to get the answers out of me (not including my half a year of depression she desperately wanted to help me with). I wanted to tell her, to just spit it out. I couldn't do it, I just couldn't get out the words.

I really don't have any advice, when I did it (and lucky me I only had one person close to me to come out too) my mum ended up just spelling out the alphabet and me telling her when to stop until it spelled out G.I.D.

Crazy I know, but I just couldn't spit it out.
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Benjamin

Wanting to "confess" makes it sound as though you've done something wrong.  As though you've committed a terrible act you're ashamed of.  Of course, nothing could be further from the truth. 

So, my only advice would be that, to start with, let your dad know you need to tell him something, or that you need to share something with him.
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PolarBear

What Benjamin said, plus that if you really think that you can't get the words out, write a letter beforehand.
You can either read the letter to him, or let him read it himself if that makes things easier for you.

Either way, it's scary as heck.


Good luck.
Vincent
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Miniar

Quote from: SilverFang on October 06, 2009, 03:56:44 AM
One sentence?

"I'm a transsexual and want to start treatment."

Quite understandable.

SilverFang

That's sort of what I did,.. in writing.. over email.. from a safe distance



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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Ryuu

Quote from: asfsd4214 on October 06, 2009, 04:58:47 AM
I really don't have any advice, when I did it (and lucky me I only had one person close to me to come out too) my mum ended up just spelling out the alphabet and me telling her when to stop until it spelled out G.I.D.

Crazy I know, but I just couldn't spit it out.

LOL...my mom had to play 20 questions with me. Both when I told her I was bisexual and when I told her I was trans. xD
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Myself

:D

Did we all ask them to come for a conversation to tell them and then have a hard time?

I told mom I need to tell her something, we sat on my bed in my room and I couldn't say, my mom isn't the playful type and I am not sure if I could desribe her as gentle so she would just say "you can tell me" until I did it :D

It's hard! even if it's not something bad, we imagine they'd freak..

Good luck! :)
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Radar

Quote from: Myself on October 06, 2009, 11:54:14 PMIt's hard! even if it's not something bad, we imagine they'd freak..
Because most of the time people do.
"In this one of many possible worlds, all for the best, or some bizarre test?
It is what it is—and whatever.
Time is still the infinite jest."
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Lachlann

Quote from: Aaron22 on October 06, 2009, 11:06:33 PM
LOL...my mom had to play 20 questions with me. Both when I told her I was bisexual and when I told her I was trans. xD

You could make it family game!  :D

I don't know what advice I can give you. I told my mom nonchalantly and it worked.
Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own
Love will open every door it's in your hands, the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold
What are you waiting for, spread your wings and soar
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Al James

i told my mum i was changing my name: then statrted the converstion with ' you know for the last twenty years you've thought i was a lesbian? well actually i'm not i'm a straight male and i'm trying to get surgery' After I'd helped her into a chair and made her a cup of tea she was sort of ok-as in she totally changexd the subject which i took as a hint she didn't want to carry on the conversation just yet ;D
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